Taken a step backwards... Is this normal?

[Louise1989]

Hi everyone,

This is my first time posting here. Wanted to seek some advice as I have some counselling booked but not for a few weeks and I am feeling pretty awful. I was raped about 7 months ago... I felt horrible for about 2 months afterwards. Very stressed and anxious all the time... I was irritable and depressed and found it difficult to talk to people or even look them in the eyes. But I started to feel better and have made some changes, I went away for a little while and I have now relocated. I was feeling a lot better and back to my normal self. But the past couple of weeks, for no reason that I can see, I have started to feel the way I felt initially after the assault again. I'm very irritable with people, I get frustrated and can't concentrate and I am teary all the time. I have also had thoughts of self harming for the first time in my life, which is really scary for me as I am normally such a happy and in control person. Is this sort of regression normal? And is it likely to be related to the rape or is this likely to be something seperate?

Any advice on how to cope would be really appreciated.

Thank you.

[RFLH]

Have you been to your GP or GUM clinic or talked to one of the Rape Crisis Centres? They are really helpful in explaining that what you are feeling is normal. You can't have something traumatic happen to you and think you can brush it away - it will come back to bite you.

Try to resist self harming - if you feel the urge, try snapping an elastic band on your wrist - it sounds mad but its a distraction technique that can help.

Have you reported the attack to the police?

[Louise1989]

Have you been to your GP or GUM clinic or talked to one of the Rape Crisis Centres? They are really helpful in explaining that what you are feeling is normal. You can't have something traumatic happen to you and think you can brush it away - it will come back to bite you.

Try to resist self harming - if you feel the urge, try snapping an elastic band on your wrist - it sounds mad but its a distraction technique that can help.

Have you reported the attack to the police?

Yes I reported it a few days after it happened. Went through the whole procedure but it didn't end up going to court. Lack of evidence regarding consent.

Thanks for the advice.

[RFLH]

Have you talked to any one about this?

[Louise1989]

I told a couple of my friends, and I have had one counselling session. But it's difficult to bring up after so long.

[RFLH]

yes it is very difficult when you've tried to bury it deep inside for so lot - but you really do need to talk it out. You will benefit for it even though it will be incredibly difficult.

Please do consider http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/ - they are fully trained to be able to help you far better than I can on here - which isn't to say, stop posting - I just want you to get the best help available for you, so you can lead a happier life.

[Louise1989]

Thank you, I will have a look. I think my problem is really that I just want someone to tell me I'm normal for feeling this way! Don't want to make a big deal out of it but just would like to know that I'm not being melodramatic!

[RFLH]

No, you're correct - it is normal and you will have flashbacks. You can't have something this traumatic happen to you and imagine that you won't suffer from it. That's why talking about it helps. Please don't bottle it up, because although you may think you're coping alright with it - at some point it will bubble to the surface. It is a big deal and should be treated as such.