I have always been better at giving advice than receiving advice and I guess thats why its hard to take some positive steps to overcome this mental state I am in right now.
If I could curl up and die right now I would. I feel worthless. I would never kill myself but I would not mind if I died right now. I think all the abuse I have put up with has finally got me. Its like all the time I was pretending it was not that bad and it was normal I seemed to be able to carry on with life at a rapid speed. Too fast in fact and now it is my time to crash and lick my wounds. Its just everything feels so hard. I love my house to be very clean and I have not wahed the pots today, the washing machine has broken and the vacuum cleaner and in a way I dont give a damn and dont have the energy to go about getting them fixed. I am really fed up. I have started a new med that has not kicked in yet, I have tried to stay well away from meds but this time I think I need them or I might go off the rails.
Sorry for moaning I just needed to offload...
If I could curl up and die right now I would. I feel worthless. I would never kill myself but I would not mind if I died right now. I think all the abuse I have put up with has finally got me. Its like all the time I was pretending it was not that bad and it was normal I seemed to be able to carry on with life at a rapid speed. Too fast in fact and now it is my time to crash and lick my wounds. Its just everything feels so hard. I love my house to be very clean and I have not wahed the pots today, the washing machine has broken and the vacuum cleaner and in a way I dont give a damn and dont have the energy to go about getting them fixed. I am really fed up. I have started a new med that has not kicked in yet, I have tried to stay well away from meds but this time I think I need them or I might go off the rails.
Sorry for moaning I just needed to offload...
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