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Hi i don't even know where to start, the last 6 months has been hell for me and my partner. I guess it would be best to start at the beginning.
My partner went on a night out and halfway through the night we met up and had a really big argument where a lot of hurtful things were said including me telling him I didn't want to be with him anymore and he wouldn't be able to get into our house. Anyway he ended up being on his own after his brother left him in town after a lot of heavy drinking and because of our argument my partner didn't want to come home and decided to walk towards our house. On his way he bumped into a woman he knew and they had a conversation and it came out that she was now a prostitute and she asked him if he wanted oral sex. Stupidly my partner agreed however he says almost immediately he knew it was wrong and pushed her off him, then for some unknown reason that even he can't understand he decided to take her money from her and run off. She then called the police and said she had been raped. The law has now changed and oral sex is also now classed as rape. Obviously with her knowing my partner she knew his name and was able to describe him and he was arrested on his way home. She then told the police in her statement she was dragged over a fence and forced and he was really threatening towards her although she had no marks on her to prove it. Because of this he was refused bail the next day and had to be held on remand at prison until his next court appearance for bail.
My partner did everything he could to be able to get bail even willing to stay only in our town and not go north of the motorway but because she lived over 15 miles away and frequently visited our town and there was a chance she could bump into him he was refused bail again and was sent to prison. He was named in our local paper as a rapist and our home address was printed. I thought the law was innocent until proven guilty ut in his case he was guilty from the moment she made her statement. Obviously the whole situation took its toll on me, I was put on anti-depressants, tranquilisers and had to be assessed by a psychiatrist and I had to move out of our home because I didn't feel safe living on my own and knowing people thought he had done what was described in the paper. It was never once mentioned how the law had changed or that it was oral sex and so people have said he was a monster etc which has been really hard as I know he isn't like that and he just made a silly druken mistake which we are both now paying for.
He was only given a duty solicitor and nobody would speak to me because he is over the age of 18 and we didn't know how to go about getting him a better solicitor. He was told if he pleaded guilty he would be given 6 years but if he pleaded not guilty but was found guilty he could get 8-9 years. While he was in prison he met a lot of people who had all been in a similar situation and tried to fight it and lost. He even admitted he robbed this woman but she never mentioned this to the police and they didn't decide to pursue it either.
Anyway at his plea hearing my partner pleaded guilty because he couldn't face doing 9 years in prison and he felt guilty for robbing the woman and for cheating on me. He was eventually sentenced to 4 years which the judge said was based on robbery and even the judge said he accepted that it was out of character and his regret from his pre-sentencing report. Even his probabtion officer made a report to say he was deeply ashamed and sorry for what he did and he didn't pose a risk. He is now in a prison a hundred miles away and only allowed 2 visits a month and shares a cell with a guy who was accused of the same thing and tried to fight it and lost and is now doing 7 years.
What I can't understand is why we didn't have any help or support from anyone and why the police didn't do their job properly as in checking this woman's background because obviously being a prostitute it would be on her record and it is apparently known that a lot of prostitutes are now doing this to get the compensation. It makes me so angry because there are genuine women out there who have actually had to go through this awful experience and don't report it and the woman who admit to to falsely accuse men of rape are not even punished themselves. There is never an apology printed in a newspaper to say that it was a false accusation but the man's reputation is ruined forever and his family is also put through unnecessary hurt and pain.
Sorry for it being so long but i've just had to get it off my chest.
J x
My partner went on a night out and halfway through the night we met up and had a really big argument where a lot of hurtful things were said including me telling him I didn't want to be with him anymore and he wouldn't be able to get into our house. Anyway he ended up being on his own after his brother left him in town after a lot of heavy drinking and because of our argument my partner didn't want to come home and decided to walk towards our house. On his way he bumped into a woman he knew and they had a conversation and it came out that she was now a prostitute and she asked him if he wanted oral sex. Stupidly my partner agreed however he says almost immediately he knew it was wrong and pushed her off him, then for some unknown reason that even he can't understand he decided to take her money from her and run off. She then called the police and said she had been raped. The law has now changed and oral sex is also now classed as rape. Obviously with her knowing my partner she knew his name and was able to describe him and he was arrested on his way home. She then told the police in her statement she was dragged over a fence and forced and he was really threatening towards her although she had no marks on her to prove it. Because of this he was refused bail the next day and had to be held on remand at prison until his next court appearance for bail.
My partner did everything he could to be able to get bail even willing to stay only in our town and not go north of the motorway but because she lived over 15 miles away and frequently visited our town and there was a chance she could bump into him he was refused bail again and was sent to prison. He was named in our local paper as a rapist and our home address was printed. I thought the law was innocent until proven guilty ut in his case he was guilty from the moment she made her statement. Obviously the whole situation took its toll on me, I was put on anti-depressants, tranquilisers and had to be assessed by a psychiatrist and I had to move out of our home because I didn't feel safe living on my own and knowing people thought he had done what was described in the paper. It was never once mentioned how the law had changed or that it was oral sex and so people have said he was a monster etc which has been really hard as I know he isn't like that and he just made a silly druken mistake which we are both now paying for.
He was only given a duty solicitor and nobody would speak to me because he is over the age of 18 and we didn't know how to go about getting him a better solicitor. He was told if he pleaded guilty he would be given 6 years but if he pleaded not guilty but was found guilty he could get 8-9 years. While he was in prison he met a lot of people who had all been in a similar situation and tried to fight it and lost. He even admitted he robbed this woman but she never mentioned this to the police and they didn't decide to pursue it either.
Anyway at his plea hearing my partner pleaded guilty because he couldn't face doing 9 years in prison and he felt guilty for robbing the woman and for cheating on me. He was eventually sentenced to 4 years which the judge said was based on robbery and even the judge said he accepted that it was out of character and his regret from his pre-sentencing report. Even his probabtion officer made a report to say he was deeply ashamed and sorry for what he did and he didn't pose a risk. He is now in a prison a hundred miles away and only allowed 2 visits a month and shares a cell with a guy who was accused of the same thing and tried to fight it and lost and is now doing 7 years.
What I can't understand is why we didn't have any help or support from anyone and why the police didn't do their job properly as in checking this woman's background because obviously being a prostitute it would be on her record and it is apparently known that a lot of prostitutes are now doing this to get the compensation. It makes me so angry because there are genuine women out there who have actually had to go through this awful experience and don't report it and the woman who admit to to falsely accuse men of rape are not even punished themselves. There is never an apology printed in a newspaper to say that it was a false accusation but the man's reputation is ruined forever and his family is also put through unnecessary hurt and pain.
Sorry for it being so long but i've just had to get it off my chest.
J x
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