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My 16yr old son has been falsely accused of rape by an 18yr old girl. He has Aspergers and ADHD and met her by chance at a specialist college where he was attending for his taster day.
She was also attending a taster week.
At the end of the day, when we picked him up he asked to meet her later on, which he did and although there was an issue where he was harrassed by some boys he came home and all was quiet.
I got a text message from a work colleague who asked that I give her a ring, it transpired she had been working with this girl and her family. She suggested that I give the Mum a ring as it may be useful for me to talk to her. I aksed her why and she said that this girl was very vulnerable and that she had a history of fantasising. This girl also has Aspergers. I duly spoke with the Mother, who warned me that she did indeed have a history of making false allegations and of fantasising about sex. Completely at a loss as to what to do, I suggested to her that it probably wouldn't be advisable to stop their budding friendship, but instead to police/supervise their contact as much as possible. She answered that yes, we would need to do that.
Consequently, when my son told me he was going to meet this girl on Saturday morning I ensured it was in a public place and insisited he phone another friend of his to meet up with him first. Believing I had every avenue covered, I let him go off with his friend to meet this girl.
Later that day, he returned home, then went out to meet another friend and I asked him if everything was okay. He said it was, but that this girl had experienced a hypo whilst they were in the town and he had gone to Tesco's to buy her some sweets with the friend she had turned up with. I asked if anything had happened between them and he said no. I asked him more directly and he asked why I needed to know. I did try to explain that she was very vulnerable and that as we didn't know her she could accuse him of anything and he answered, 'why would she do that, she's my girlfriend?'
At 1.20am the Police hammered on our door and cautioned him for Rape, although we didn't know that at the time. We got to the Police Station and were told very little.
He underwent forensic testing, including swabbing etc. and was utttily traumatised by the whole situation. The next day we got a duty solicitor to be with him whilst he was interviewed and his story didn't change. He openly admitted to having consential sex with her.
I then found out that the boy she had taken with her to meet my son was also accused of rape. His mother asked me who I was in the waiting room. Completely shocked, I just said that I was sure that neither of them had done anything.
After 17hrs in Police custody he was bailed to return next month. We don't know if my son's friend was also accused. And obviously we are not allowed to talk to anyone. The Officer in charge of the case said that she hopes to have it cleared up as quickly as possible.
I've found a solicitor who specialises in these types of cases, but the aftermath is enormous and I'm watching my child push his self-destruct button. To make matters worse, I got a phone call from the lady who runs the specialist college placement explaining that she had been trying to get hold of me since my son visited to warn me to keep him away from this girl. She was unaware of the rape allegation but seemed certain that it would all amount to nothing.
Nothing? I am in absolute pieces and can't do my job, can't sleep, eat or anything. All the while, I'm dealing with my special needs child who in complete frustration has torn my house apart. Even if this comes to nothing, which is not looking likely as they clearly believe her, it is me and my family who will be left to pick up the pieces of a very broken young man.
Any suggestions or help would be appreciated.
Thank you
Robin
She was also attending a taster week.
At the end of the day, when we picked him up he asked to meet her later on, which he did and although there was an issue where he was harrassed by some boys he came home and all was quiet.
I got a text message from a work colleague who asked that I give her a ring, it transpired she had been working with this girl and her family. She suggested that I give the Mum a ring as it may be useful for me to talk to her. I aksed her why and she said that this girl was very vulnerable and that she had a history of fantasising. This girl also has Aspergers. I duly spoke with the Mother, who warned me that she did indeed have a history of making false allegations and of fantasising about sex. Completely at a loss as to what to do, I suggested to her that it probably wouldn't be advisable to stop their budding friendship, but instead to police/supervise their contact as much as possible. She answered that yes, we would need to do that.
Consequently, when my son told me he was going to meet this girl on Saturday morning I ensured it was in a public place and insisited he phone another friend of his to meet up with him first. Believing I had every avenue covered, I let him go off with his friend to meet this girl.
Later that day, he returned home, then went out to meet another friend and I asked him if everything was okay. He said it was, but that this girl had experienced a hypo whilst they were in the town and he had gone to Tesco's to buy her some sweets with the friend she had turned up with. I asked if anything had happened between them and he said no. I asked him more directly and he asked why I needed to know. I did try to explain that she was very vulnerable and that as we didn't know her she could accuse him of anything and he answered, 'why would she do that, she's my girlfriend?'
At 1.20am the Police hammered on our door and cautioned him for Rape, although we didn't know that at the time. We got to the Police Station and were told very little.
He underwent forensic testing, including swabbing etc. and was utttily traumatised by the whole situation. The next day we got a duty solicitor to be with him whilst he was interviewed and his story didn't change. He openly admitted to having consential sex with her.
I then found out that the boy she had taken with her to meet my son was also accused of rape. His mother asked me who I was in the waiting room. Completely shocked, I just said that I was sure that neither of them had done anything.
After 17hrs in Police custody he was bailed to return next month. We don't know if my son's friend was also accused. And obviously we are not allowed to talk to anyone. The Officer in charge of the case said that she hopes to have it cleared up as quickly as possible.
I've found a solicitor who specialises in these types of cases, but the aftermath is enormous and I'm watching my child push his self-destruct button. To make matters worse, I got a phone call from the lady who runs the specialist college placement explaining that she had been trying to get hold of me since my son visited to warn me to keep him away from this girl. She was unaware of the rape allegation but seemed certain that it would all amount to nothing.
Nothing? I am in absolute pieces and can't do my job, can't sleep, eat or anything. All the while, I'm dealing with my special needs child who in complete frustration has torn my house apart. Even if this comes to nothing, which is not looking likely as they clearly believe her, it is me and my family who will be left to pick up the pieces of a very broken young man.
Any suggestions or help would be appreciated.
Thank you
Robin
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