Falsely accused of rape... I’m so scared

[Chalky]

Yesterday morning I was arrested and accused of rape, ive never been so shocked and scared in all my life. I would never and have never done anything like this in my life and I’ve got so much to loose...

All I’m thinking is about all the bad scenario’s and I haven’t eat for 2 days and honestly would end it all of it wasn’t for my little boy. I’m so scared and i need help.

The situation was, we all went on a staff night out (which I didn’t want to go on), we all got drunk and I brought my staff 2 vodka bottle served and vip booth. We had drinks and one of the girls got drunk and was sick in the toilet, another girl said she would take her home and my duty manager suggested I go with them cause I had to be up early. We got her in the taxi and me and the girl in question fell asleep in the back, we were both drunk. I woke up outside my apartment in the taxi with her and woke her up and asked if she was ok, she said yes and I said do you want to stay in the apartment and I’ll sleep on the couch, she said yeh and we got upstairs and I put her into bed fully clothed and got her some water, she drank it and I said I’ll be in the living room if you need me, she then said will you spoon me so I got on top of the covers fully clothed and she grabbed my arm and wrapped it around her. I asked how she was feeling and she said better now, we then started talking about my ex who also works there and half way through she turned and started kissing me, I asked if she was sure she wanted to do this and she carried on kissing me. This led to her starting four play with me and all the time I asked if she wanted to do this, even when we started having sex I kept asking and she kept saying yes. I couldn’t carry on and after we finished she started worrying about her boyfriend, I don’t know what to say so I said we will talk in the morning. We both fell straight to sleep and in the morning she mentioned her boyfriend and my ex saying that she is gonna have to tell them and she was worried about it. After she left she messaged me saying sorry about the night and we had a convo about drinking and she was being friendly with me. We didn’t speak until 3 days later when she said she didn’t concent to what happened and that she was too drunk to and I said I would never do that and I asked loads of times is she wanted to, we were both drunk but not too drunk to concent...

Help me please.

[Casehardened]

Hello and welcome to the forum,

I can fully understand your shock at being arrested but you may take some comfort in that similar scenarios crop up on the forum very regularly; it's usually an attempt to deflect the wrath of parents/boyfriend/partner/husband when they find out about the 'playing away from home' by making the accusation that they didn't consent to the encounter.

Hopefully Peter will see your post as he recently posted some relevant information (which I can't now recall!) regarding the validity of consent while under the influence.

The justice system, whilst slow and long-winded, mostly sees through these sort of false accusations. However, if you didn't have your phone taken, it would still be worth saving the messages you've had from her.

There is some general advice in this link:

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...at-happens-now

[Peter1975]

I’m afraid that I’m away from my computer right now and have no bookmarks on my phone but I’ll do my best before my battery dies.

I agree with CH that this seems a classic case of guilt or regret on her behalf, we all do things under the influence of drink that we wouldn’t otherwise.

Drunken consent is still consent, it is up to any prosecution to first prove that there was no consent and then you must raise the defence that your belief in her consent was reasonable, which clearly it was from your description of events.

You don’t say whether you had a solicitor present when you were interviewed ?

If you didn’t then I would urge you to seek some legal advice as soon as possible.

If you tell us the rough area that you are in we might be able to recommend one or you can consult the thread in the useful information section.

Write everything down while it is fresh in your memory, details can be important,keep all messages

As CH says, the vast majority of these cases go nowhere but it is always wise to be proactive in your defence.

Hang in there.

[Chalky]

Thank you so much for replying,

I did have a solicitor present, it was the one I got through the police free. They also sieved my phone on the Saturday morning. The area I’m in is in the north west between Liverpool and Manchester, the girl in question told the police that all she remember is being in the last bar we were in and passing out, waking up with me on top of her, then she said she passed out again and then woke up next to me both naked and asked what she was doing there, this didn’t happen because She honestly spoke to me through the night about my ex and about how bad she felt about her boyfriend.

I’m scared that they are going to side with her because she is a woman and training to join the police.

My head keeps thinking of every possible worse situation and I’m tired of not being myself and always being scared.

Thank you for helping me.

[Peter1975]

What did the duty solicitor say? Do you feel you gave a good account of yourself?

There is no legal aid for advice unless you are charged but most solicitors will give you ten minutes of their time for an opinion. I think there are a couple of sols recommended in the Manchester area.. one is harry boodloo, they are plotted on a google map in the useful information section. Another legal opinion might give you some reassurance.

Was the other woman still in the taxi when you asked the accuser if she wanted to stay at yours? She might be an important witness. The messages she sent afterward will hopefully count in your favour once the police get around to examining your phone. ( this may take some time)

I read somewhere that blacking out under the influence of drink is the brain temporarily being unable to create new memories rather than forgetting anything and so you can perhaps sympathise with someone having no memory, putting two and two together and making five ... although of course, she may remember more than she claims, perhaps her boyfriend called the police. We have seen it many times here.

Ultimately, the truth is on your side and you will be consistent because you are telling the truth, it’s natural to think of worst case scenarios but there is no reason for you to despair.

If you have a good root around the forum you will find many stories similar to yours, the majority of which go no further than an interview. Fingers crossed, you will be another one.

Look after yourself

[Chalky]

He just took down my account of what happened and took interest in the text she sent in the morning after the incident, the text said.. I’m such an idiot, I’m sorry about last night. I told the truth about what happened and I know it was concentual, I’m positive that she mentioned sleeping at the apartment to her. I haven’t spoke to anyone about it just my close friend who works with me. I’m unsure whether to speak to the girl in the taxi who is a positive witness, what do I do?

I have had a look and there is so many it’s hard to find one like mine. I’ve also looked at solicitors in my area who specialise in defence of things like this and I’m still unsure of who to speak to, I’m in the north west and all the ones that are highly recommended are in London

Thank you for replying, it’s helping me a lot. Constantly thinking the worst.

[Chalky]

I was also thinking that the morning after it happened when she was texting me as normal, she apparently went to the please that same day (the day after it happened) and she messaged me again on the Sunday saying that she was too drunk to concent and she didn’t want to sleep with me. (This was 3 days after she spoke to the police) could this be entrapment? Because she is trying to get me to admit to it and shouldn’t the police of said not to contact me?

I’m thinking over everything

[Peter1975]

The fact that she was texting you as normal the next day and apologising can only undermine the account she gave to police.

She shouldn't have been texting you after speaking to police but there is nothing legally preventing her, I would say you are right, she was trying to get you say something incriminating. If she contacts you again, do not respond but take screenshots and keep the messages safe.

Who knows what happened the next day between her texting you and her calling police, perhaps her boyfriend was suspicious.. perhaps she remembers more than she has claimed... it doesn't pay to speculate, you can't see into her mind no matter how hard you try.

Concentrate on what you know, writing everything down in a timeline is a good thing to do, keep adding to it if things spring to mind - it's often advised to keep a notebook with you in case you remember anything.

If you have given your account as you have here then the texts she sent the next day would tend to corroborate your version of events - if she really had little memory apart from you waking up on top of her, why on earth would she apologise?

Around 80% of cases like yours won't go to court, take heart from that and try to look after yourself. Eat well and exercise. There really is no sense in making yourself ill over this. There is no shame in going to see your doctor if you feel depressed.

You are going to get through this.

The most recommended solicitors in the north is Jordans in Doncaster, if that's not too far. Speak to Hollie Allcock.

http://www.qualitysolicitors.com/jor.../hollie-alcock

Harry Boodhoo in Manchester comes highly recommended by PAFAA's legal advisor

http://www.harryboodhoo.co.uk/

There are one or two others recommended on the map:

https://www.google.com/maps/d/viewer...7929129385&z=7

[298]

If your still looking for a solicitor..

http://www.olliers.com/ in Manchester (near the Science Museum)

These things progress slowly so while life is on hold, keep sane, eat, exercise, walk, it helps.

[Peter1975]

http://www.olliers.com/ in Manchester (near the Science Museum)

These things progress slowly so while life is on hold, keep sane, eat, exercise, walk, it helps.

Thanks 298,

this is good advice.

It is always recommended here that it is the solicitor and not the firm they work for that is important; just think of your own work and how many incompetents seem to get away with winging it!

Also, sols can annoyingly move firms...

Do you have a name? Perhaps you could add them to the recommended sols thread in the useful information section.

Many thanks.

[298]

Thanks 298,

this is good advice.

It is always recommended here that it is the solicitor and not the firm they work for that is important; just think of your own work and how many incompetents seem to get away with winging it!

Also, sols can annoyingly move firms...

Do you have a name? Perhaps you could add them to the recommended sols thread in the useful information section.

Many thanks.

Matthew Claughton https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tn5trZBWQ4k

[Bob1234]

Hi Chalky,

sorry to see you on this forum. Your story is similar to mine (to some extent). If you can please try to find it (on my mobile so i cannot search as well), and have a read.

please write down everything from the night out and keep it safe. don't show anyone just yet. also the texts, any follow up messages etc don't show them to the police. they do not help you and can use it against you. wait till (if you are charged) and then you can build your case.

I know the feeling you are going through - its the worst and in all honesty doesn't get better anytime soon. Keep strong and have a support network of people you can trust. if you need to open up to someone, i found talking to a shrink somewhat helpful.

its a long road from here - NFA or further action. keep checking in and reading stories and updating us on here, the people on this forum got me through the worst time of my life.

Bob