Hi, All
STORY
Back in 2018 during March, I went clubbing with a group of friends to a night club in my local town just your average Saturday night out. I was in the night club dancing with my friends having a great time, fast forward 1 hour later we are on the bottom floor of the night club. All my guy and female friends are dancing together. I began to dance with a female friend who’s [18 years old] and 4 months away from been [19 years old] at the time I was [20 years old] and 5 months from been [21 years old].
I and my female friend start to dance together then suddenly we just looked at each other and began kissing. All of our friends were surprised but cheering us on and we both carried on. We spent the night together with my friends and continued to dance together for the night and kissing and all over each other. Fast forward 2 hours later, we all leave the night club early as it’s not lively enough for us. I leave the club with the girl and we are holding hands and kissing down the street. Then we went somewhere quiet and carried on kissing and nearly had sexual intercourse in public place but we didn’t. We catch up with the rest of our friends and all catch a taxi together to my friend's house.
We arrive at my friend's house, everyone is in good spat laughing joking about playing card games etc. I’m in the toilet with a girl further kissing and nearly have sexual intercourse in my friend's bathroom. But we don’t and go into the lounge and hang out with others and play the games and just chat the night away. Later on, we all go to bed, I’m sleeping on my friend's bedroom on the floor. I and the girl start having a conversation and saying to each other let’s ****. She asks me so I want to have sex I said yes and she does as well. We then have sexual intercourse for 5 minutes our friends could hear us and we’re laughing and one of our friends was close to us who was drunk said you are dirty freaks and laughs then sleeps. I asked her to go on top during sexual intercourse and she said no, so I carried on but I told I couldn’t I was struggling and then stopped and went to sleep.
I’m the morning after me and the girl agreed to never speak of what happened because we were ashamed. But she was more embarrassed because I used to be friends with her ex-boyfriend and she didn’t want him to know. She then left and went downstairs and cuddled my friend and tried it on with the morning after. Then later on she left and was just moody and embarrassed and upset and got dropped home.
My Relationship With The Female
•Known each other for years
•Hanged around together with friends
•Spoke regularly
•Went to similar social events
•Booked up with friends
•She dated my ex-best friend
- At the time I slept with her we weren’t in contact much just a little bit every so often
Instagram Message -
Two weeks later I get a message via Instagram direct messenger from her saying the following “Do you have any STD or AIDS” I reply no I get myself checked out regularly then she’s alright with that and we stay having a normal conversation and we speak about normal things.
5 months later -
I’m out with a friend on Saturday night enjoying my evening in a night club. I and my friend go into the smoking area to have a cigarette. Then 2 minutes later a guy who I know who regularly goes out asks to speak to me in private. He asks me if I had Raped the girl ************ I say no and get extremely upset and angry by remaining calm and have the conversation. I tell him this the first I’ve heard this information and why would be our clubbing if I did such a thing. I then ask him who told him and he tells me all the information about what he was told.
The person who told this guy is an old friend of mine who I used to hang out with but lost contact. This person is the guy who was extremely drunk at my friend's house and laughed at me and the girl *********. [He began sleeping around eight female for short period of time] I called him on the phone and questioned him why he was making such rumours go around and he explained that’s how the made it seem when he asked her about sleeping with myself. He also told the girl said to him “why didn’t you stop him”. I believe she told him this because she’s embarrassed for sleeping with me and I’m not exactly top looking lad. I’ve had my ex ask me if I slept with this girl in question and I told her yes I did and I asked her how she found. She told me the girl ********** I slept with told her so she’s told others I’ve slept with then told someone else different thing.
I have been very sad and depressed due to this whole situation my mental health has exploded I’m constantly thinking and losing the plot. A week ago I nearly crashed twice while driving due to stress and not in control of my mind. I’ve lost a huge amount of weight and my work performance is down extremely and it’s concerning my management. I have had thoughts about suicide frequently and just feeling so low. Been accused of something like this is horrible even if you aren’t charged or investigated people make there own judgement.
People Around Me -
I haven’t had the girl contact me at all or any contact since
I haven’t had any person come up to me and asks me questions about the girl
I haven’t had any of her friends contact me or family members
I haven’t heard anything on social media about me I have friends keeping an eye out
I haven’t had a police interview or been questioned at all
I haven’t had any messages from anyone
Things I’ve done so far -
•Blocked the female on all social media platforms and blocked her friends and family.
•Removed my self ok social media platforms
•Stopped going out so I do not bump into her
•Stopped going out in local places or anywhere where I could potentially see her
•Written down all events and things that happen on the evening
•Spoke to my friend who let us stay at his house and explained everything [ He said that’s not true and would back me up if needed]
•Read information on what to do if arrested and questioned etc.
Plus her ex-boyfriend works there and he doesn’t like me so I think it’s best I leave just to be on the safe side of things. I'm leaving my job soon because I get the bus and there's a chance I could see the girl, I’ve seen her since we had sexual intercourse clubbing and she hasn’t said anything she just looked at me this before I knew what she had told that person.
Sorry for the massive amount of text. If anyone has any general or more specific advice then I'll appreciate it a lot. Thanks for everything.
STORY
Back in 2018 during March, I went clubbing with a group of friends to a night club in my local town just your average Saturday night out. I was in the night club dancing with my friends having a great time, fast forward 1 hour later we are on the bottom floor of the night club. All my guy and female friends are dancing together. I began to dance with a female friend who’s [18 years old] and 4 months away from been [19 years old] at the time I was [20 years old] and 5 months from been [21 years old].
I and my female friend start to dance together then suddenly we just looked at each other and began kissing. All of our friends were surprised but cheering us on and we both carried on. We spent the night together with my friends and continued to dance together for the night and kissing and all over each other. Fast forward 2 hours later, we all leave the night club early as it’s not lively enough for us. I leave the club with the girl and we are holding hands and kissing down the street. Then we went somewhere quiet and carried on kissing and nearly had sexual intercourse in public place but we didn’t. We catch up with the rest of our friends and all catch a taxi together to my friend's house.
We arrive at my friend's house, everyone is in good spat laughing joking about playing card games etc. I’m in the toilet with a girl further kissing and nearly have sexual intercourse in my friend's bathroom. But we don’t and go into the lounge and hang out with others and play the games and just chat the night away. Later on, we all go to bed, I’m sleeping on my friend's bedroom on the floor. I and the girl start having a conversation and saying to each other let’s ****. She asks me so I want to have sex I said yes and she does as well. We then have sexual intercourse for 5 minutes our friends could hear us and we’re laughing and one of our friends was close to us who was drunk said you are dirty freaks and laughs then sleeps. I asked her to go on top during sexual intercourse and she said no, so I carried on but I told I couldn’t I was struggling and then stopped and went to sleep.
I’m the morning after me and the girl agreed to never speak of what happened because we were ashamed. But she was more embarrassed because I used to be friends with her ex-boyfriend and she didn’t want him to know. She then left and went downstairs and cuddled my friend and tried it on with the morning after. Then later on she left and was just moody and embarrassed and upset and got dropped home.
My Relationship With The Female
•Known each other for years
•Hanged around together with friends
•Spoke regularly
•Went to similar social events
•Booked up with friends
•She dated my ex-best friend
- At the time I slept with her we weren’t in contact much just a little bit every so often
Instagram Message -
Two weeks later I get a message via Instagram direct messenger from her saying the following “Do you have any STD or AIDS” I reply no I get myself checked out regularly then she’s alright with that and we stay having a normal conversation and we speak about normal things.
5 months later -
I’m out with a friend on Saturday night enjoying my evening in a night club. I and my friend go into the smoking area to have a cigarette. Then 2 minutes later a guy who I know who regularly goes out asks to speak to me in private. He asks me if I had Raped the girl ************ I say no and get extremely upset and angry by remaining calm and have the conversation. I tell him this the first I’ve heard this information and why would be our clubbing if I did such a thing. I then ask him who told him and he tells me all the information about what he was told.
The person who told this guy is an old friend of mine who I used to hang out with but lost contact. This person is the guy who was extremely drunk at my friend's house and laughed at me and the girl *********. [He began sleeping around eight female for short period of time] I called him on the phone and questioned him why he was making such rumours go around and he explained that’s how the made it seem when he asked her about sleeping with myself. He also told the girl said to him “why didn’t you stop him”. I believe she told him this because she’s embarrassed for sleeping with me and I’m not exactly top looking lad. I’ve had my ex ask me if I slept with this girl in question and I told her yes I did and I asked her how she found. She told me the girl ********** I slept with told her so she’s told others I’ve slept with then told someone else different thing.
I have been very sad and depressed due to this whole situation my mental health has exploded I’m constantly thinking and losing the plot. A week ago I nearly crashed twice while driving due to stress and not in control of my mind. I’ve lost a huge amount of weight and my work performance is down extremely and it’s concerning my management. I have had thoughts about suicide frequently and just feeling so low. Been accused of something like this is horrible even if you aren’t charged or investigated people make there own judgement.
People Around Me -
I haven’t had the girl contact me at all or any contact since
I haven’t had any person come up to me and asks me questions about the girl
I haven’t had any of her friends contact me or family members
I haven’t heard anything on social media about me I have friends keeping an eye out
I haven’t had a police interview or been questioned at all
I haven’t had any messages from anyone
Things I’ve done so far -
•Blocked the female on all social media platforms and blocked her friends and family.
•Removed my self ok social media platforms
•Stopped going out so I do not bump into her
•Stopped going out in local places or anywhere where I could potentially see her
•Written down all events and things that happen on the evening
•Spoke to my friend who let us stay at his house and explained everything [ He said that’s not true and would back me up if needed]
•Read information on what to do if arrested and questioned etc.
Plus her ex-boyfriend works there and he doesn’t like me so I think it’s best I leave just to be on the safe side of things. I'm leaving my job soon because I get the bus and there's a chance I could see the girl, I’ve seen her since we had sexual intercourse clubbing and she hasn’t said anything she just looked at me this before I knew what she had told that person.
Sorry for the massive amount of text. If anyone has any general or more specific advice then I'll appreciate it a lot. Thanks for everything.
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