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**Franticwithworry** · 26 October 2018, 04:30 PM

Hello lifeinruins. First off, I've edited your post to add some paragraphs so that it's easier to read and your experience is easier to follow. I hope you don't mind.

Next, I'm so glad you've found the site. There is lots of support here.

Now - as to what to do. Please don't panic. You've got yourself in a tangle here and it's made more difficult because you are married, your wife is pregnant and has difficulties but there are certain things you need to do in order to get through this. And get through it you will.

Of course I can't tell you how to handle your marriage or make any comment on what got you into this situation, but you need to do certain things so that you don't make the situation worse for yourself. Please DO NOT meet with the police officer without having a solicitor with you. Representation at a police station is always covered by legal aid so it won't cost you anything. You need to find a solicitor who is experienced in this kind of thing too, so ring around a few and get a feel for someone you feel comfortable with. There's a 'specialist solicitor recommendation' thread on the forum to guide you but come back and ask if you need pointing in the right direction for your area. You only need to give a broad idea of where you are. The county for instance.

Next, write down everything that you can think of from the moment you met this woman until today. Every little detail, and leave it to the solicitor to decide what's important and what's not.

I don't know why the police are changing the interview dates on you, but it's a good thing that they have done if it means that you have learned that going with a solicitor really matters.

Unfortunately, it's probably going to take quite a long time to get resolved. Don't even think of doing anything to harm yourself. Please, go to see your doctor if those thoughts keep recurring. It's not worth it; it really isn't. Yes, you've done something that you would be ashamed for your family to know about and it would hurt your wife, but you wouldn't be the first or last man who has done something similar, It really need not be the end of the world.

Panic is stopping you going to work and that's understandable but don't let the panic take over. You know that you haven't done anything close to what you have been accused of, so hold your head high, know that you are not alone in being falsely accused of something and you WILL get to the other end of this horrible experience. Take a deep breath and start sorting out a solicitor for yourself. And come back here as often as you need for continued support.

**lifeinruins** · 26 October 2018, 07:31 PM

Hi Franticwithworry,
Thanks for your kind reply to my post and I appreciate your help. I sorted the solicitor straight away when I got the call from the police officer and briefly told them what happened. I don't have any advance disclosure statement so that I can tell what exactly she told police but I do believe that she has no proof to back up her story and neither do I. I tried different recovery software to see if I can recover any deleted data from my phone to give as evidence but no satisfactory results achieved. Only there are couple messages I am 100% sure that she sent me very first time she tricked me into paying her without doing anything. downside is the recovery software didn't show the number of the sender but just unknown13. Messages go like this: I am tired and going sleep now otherwise would let you free my house is freezing, gutted we couldn't have fund, Night. These messages doesn't explicitly show that she is lying and especially when her number is not showing but these messages at least show her concerns for money when she said I would let you free. If police have got means to do a professional recovery of deleted data on both of our phones it will make it crystal clear for them that I am innocent and she is lying but I am not sure if police would accept these kind of requests. Anybody else have similar experience and would like to share their stories and any help advice will be highly appreciated as my life is in torment because of this ****. Also I would like to thank you for the creator of this forum and anyone who contribute to this site that you are doing a great work to help people.
Thank you.
Regards.

**Pond31** · 26 October 2018, 08:22 PM

Originally posted by lifeinruins View Post

Hi Franticwithworry,
Thanks for your kind reply to my post and I appreciate your help. I sorted the solicitor straight away when I got the call from the police officer and briefly told them what happened. I don't have any advance disclosure statement so that I can tell what exactly she told police but I do believe that she has no proof to back up her story and neither do I. I tried different recovery software to see if I can recover any deleted data from my phone to give as evidence but no satisfactory results achieved. Only there are couple messages I am 100% sure that she sent me very first time she tricked me into paying her without doing anything. downside is the recovery software didn't show the number of the sender but just unknown13. Messages go like this: I am tired and going sleep now otherwise would let you free my house is freezing, gutted we couldn't have fund, Night. These messages doesn't explicitly show that she is lying and especially when her number is not showing but these messages at least show her concerns for money when she said I would let you free. If police have got means to do a professional recovery of deleted data on both of our phones it will make it crystal clear for them that I am innocent and she is lying but I am not sure if police would accept these kind of requests. Anybody else have similar experience and would like to share their stories and any help advice will be highly appreciated as my life is in torment because of this ****. Also I would like to thank you for the creator of this forum and anyone who contribute to this site that you are doing a great work to help people.
Thank you.
Regards.

Hi Lifeinruins

Sorry you are on here but you are doing the right things. The police have good software which can recover messages from both your phone and the FA's phone. They can also match up times and dates of calls even if numbers are gone. Depending on your provider you nay also be able to get a record of times of all your incoming calls and texts including those from your FA. It will not be the content of the message just the time and date of you getting one. You can restore whatsapp from backups. The simple thing is to delete the app from your phone and reinstall it, the app will restore from the last saved backup which may restore messages as well. There is a possibility that your FA may not co-operate with the police if she is worried that they will find out she is having sex for money. Just hold on, it may take a while to sort things out.

Pond31

**Peter1975** · 26 October 2018, 09:09 PM

Welcome to DM LIR,

I'm sorry to see your predicament but all is not lost yet.

I can't add much to the excellent advice above but just work closely with your solicitor, from your posts it seems the police don't have your phone (or a copy of it ) already? - something you should seek your solicitors advice about, as should you regarding the CCTV and making sure it is secured if it hasn't been already.

I'm not sure what the police can recover tbh but if you have told them about the deleted messages then they should follow it up as a reasonable line of enquiry.

Take heart from the fact that most of these cases do not go beyond an investigation

**soulbug** · 28 October 2018, 12:58 AM

One thing that stands out for me, Is the police officer canceling the meetings...... Crazy question, but are you certain you have been speaking with a police officer? , did they call you, did you call the police station.? Do you have the a landlines number or just a mobile contact number for the police officer.?

Just remember this could be an attempt at blackmail.... If it is don't call them out, if it turns out to be a form of extortion, then you should report it to the police, as possibly they may of previously scammed many others in the past.

**lifeinruins** · 2 November 2018, 02:35 AM

Thanks for your kind replies.

I actually have spoken to the police officer about the matter. And I have a landline numbers and especially when they given the references that it looks legit that the real police officer contacting me regarding the serious matter. Now schedule a new interview date on this coming Monday, 5th of November 2018.

One more thing I would like to add that I didn't give my FA my real name but just a nick name which my our common friend used to call me with and I hope this will not be an issue for the police to consider me guilty of the crime. I can swear on my life that I have not commit such a horrible crime but I simply don't understand that the my FA could go this far just because she couldn't got away with my getting some money.

I have read about legislation and new caution which could narrow my chances of proving my innocence if I give a no comment interview. All I have concluded from online information and understood that I should prepare a written statement to give detailed my side of the story and then go no comment on all the questions police officer ask me in the interview. I didn't got involved with her as a paid for sex service type of thing but she was so good with me that I actually liked her and when she asked for financial help then I couldn't resist and helped her out but then she was misusing that help in order to get more money out of me.

I really don't know what's gonna happen especially when I have no proof to back up my story except if police go ahead and try to do a professional recovery of my deleted messages then it will be evident that FA's claim is false. Also I am sure that she has also deleted the call logs and messages on her phone to eliminate the chances of police finding out the truth. My phone bills that I have downloaded clearly shows the times of calls and text messages without the contents and I hope that can be an acceptable form of proof that I could give.

Also I have read about police interviews and investigations that no matter how innocent you are police's job is to charge you and arrest you and which makes me more worried as it will bring the story out to my family and everybody I know and surely will be detrimental to my life and future as well as my job. I just pray that the police do their best to first find the truth and then decide who to charge. Once again I am wholeheartedly grateful to all of you guys and the advice you have given me.
Regards.

**Casehardened** · 2 November 2018, 07:19 AM

Hi, I've split your post into paragraphs for easier comprehension but not changed any wording.

You mentioned that it is the police's job to arrest and charge you and in a sense you are correct but do remember it is in no-ones interest to bring an innocent person to court only for them to be then acquitted by a jury.

The CPS will make this decision and as they won't actually be present at the interview you they can only go on the transcript and it is therefore important to get this right.

I'm a bit worried that you were considering a no-comment interview and are considering not replying to questioning. Do consider the inference a CPS lawyer may take from this when considering whether to prosecute or not.

Please be guided by your solicitor as how you handle the interview as if they do in fact recommend a no-comment interview then no adverse inference should be taken from this.

**Pond31** · 2 November 2018, 11:07 AM

Just out of interest there is 11,000 reason for her doing this. £11,000 is the minimum amount she can claim from criminal injuries compensation even if you are not charged or even convicted. FA's have been motivated by this many times before and they don't really care who they accuse to get it.

Pond31

**lifeinruins** · 3 November 2018, 08:26 PM

Hi everyone,
Have nothing new to post on my thread but the usual anxiety and stress making me read through posts on this forum and would like to post something just to ease the pain I am going through for the past few weeks. As I mentioned earlier I have a scheduled interview on coming Monday, 05 November 2018 at 09:00 AM at the local police station. I have no physical proof in hand to prove my innocence but a picture taken by me holding her and she covered her face while she was only wearing a bra. Also I have downloaded my phone bills clearly show we exchanged text messages and call records.
There is nothing else that I can think of which might be given as an evidence to prove my innocence. My only hope that police will go through my and FA's phone to recover deleted data and eventually find out the truth before they turn me into a living dead. Every time I see my wife and kids I feel like crying but God knows how I am faking it for past 20 days or so. Having laugh in front of them and in tears in isolation.
Reading through different posts here and on the internet I can't believe how dumb the justice system is as if people given NFAs still have issues with employment and society and more importantly family and friends forget about convicted and found guilty. God forbid these kind of people who just for the pleasure either emotional or monetary destroy innocent lives.
Contrary to as everybody describes as police not being your friend especially when they call themselves 'crime stoppers' I really hope that they really do investigate properly and go through the deleted phone data to decide who is telling the truth. I will update this post and forum as I go along with this allegation.
Big thanks to creator and all members of this amazing forum.
Regards.

**Peter1975** · 4 November 2018, 09:16 AM

Good luck with your interview tomorrow.

I’ve heard of a couple of recent cases where the duty solicitor has spent all of 5 minutes with a client pre interview so make sure that you make the most of your time with the solicitor, tell them everything and follow their advice.

I’m no solicitor but I would suggest The deleted texts should be mentioned on tape, it’s no guarantee that they will follow them up or even if they can be recovered but it will be there.

You should make a back up of any devices you might hand over for forensic examination as you are unlikely to see them again for a few months, although it’s worth asking nicely if they will just clone it while you are the station.

There is one thing I should mention, which is the age of this girl. If she was under 18 then you have committed an offence by paying her, which is ridiculous considering the age of consent is 16 but worth mentioning.

**lifeinruins** · 4 November 2018, 01:43 PM

Hi Peter1975,
I have arranged a solicitor and he is not the duty solicitor which I have been advised. Also the age of the girl is definitely over 18 and likely to be nearly or over 30 and she has 3 children with her husband and claimed she is separated from him and gave away the custody of her children. She is a drug addict and only met me when she needed the money.

I truly understand the meaning of consent which can be broken at any time during the activity or if a person is underage or under the influence of drugs or alcohol. I am 100% sure she was in non of the mentioned situations and was sound, healthy and aware of what is she agreeing to.

I am unaware of what she has said in her statement but If she didn't make the complaint straight away after we had intercourse and mistakenly mentioned a date when I was somewhere else then that could possible a way for me to defend myself better.

For example last time we did it was on **** 2018 and police called me on *****, 2018. If She mentioned any day of **** 2018 the alleged incident took place then I can proof that I was home, with my family or friends as three of our family houses got CCTV cameras and can give footage to show I was home. Also I do part time security job and there are weekdays when I start work at 1600 and finish at 0800 in the morning. So any date that could linked to my shifts or when I was home can be proved as CCTV operating at my work place and home.

Most traumatic thing for me is that I am married with children and on top of it my wife is pregnant and going through a very problematic pregnancy and which makes me worry even further and I regret the day I met this horrible girl. But as people say whats gone is gone.

Looking forward to going through tomorrow's interview as best as it can be for me.

**Peter1975** · 5 November 2018, 09:18 PM

[ I've removed the specific dates from your post, "just in case" - remember this is a public forum and accusers do change dates! ]

I hope you got on ok at your interview today and were well guided by your solicitor.

Hang in there

**lifeinruins** · 8 November 2018, 08:13 PM

Hi everyone,
This is an update regarding my interview at the police station. After getting to the police station police officer spoke to my solicitor and gave him the disclosure statement. Afterwards me and my solicitor had a detailed talk about what happened. I explained to him in detail how I met the FA and how things progressed till the last meeting and allegation.

FA's statement says exactly how things happen except she said when we got to her house we ate and she didn't feel like doing it so she told me to either leave or go sleep in other room. According to her when she woke up she found me on top of her penetrating her. Also she said that I told her not to scream or I will kill her.

I explain everything to my solicitor in great detail and told him both of us never slept that time and everything was consensual. Solicitor said to me that her statement is complete fabricated story and police most likely know by the statement that there is nothing in this case and he advised me to answer the questions in interview. Also he said when advise you at any time during the interview to go no comment then do no comment.

Police officer came she explains a few things and before interview started she asked me the same thing to explain how I met her and what exactly happened. I told her the whole story as I did to solicitor. Then she began the interview which was only audio without any video recording. She asked me the questions and I answered them honestly and with due diligence.

Police officer tried a tricky question saying when you guys woke up I straight away interfere saying to police officer that none of us fell asleep that time. I replied we were only in bed talking to each other before doing it.
Then she started to reveal the petty proofs that FA has given her in the forms of photocopies. One particular text message she showed me saying " Do you think you are gonna get away with raping me? I am reporting you to the police".

Police officer asked me that did you receive this text message and I replied no, I have not, and I explained that that text message doesn't show it has been sent from her number to my number and it is just that she typed the message showing my number and then took a screenshot of it and given as a proof.

Police officer then ask do you think that she is just doing all this for nothing like going through all this, doing DNA sampling, interview, statement etc. I said I am not sure why she is going this far as I can see no reason for it. It is only that she didn't got her way with me getting the money so she decided to do this.

Then I have been asked a few questions about contacting her afterwards where I am offering her money and I replied that I didn't know that she is accusing me of rape and I just wanted to meet her until you called me saying that she has alleged me of rape. My solicitor advised me not to answer any more questions and and interview ended after a couple more questions.

After the interview my solicitor ask the police officer that are you bothered taking this to even CPS and she replied yes I am as this is a serious offence. Then she replied I don't think that this is gonna go the court but I am not promising anything.

I was a bit relieved but still worried that police now have my address and just worried that it could be any time they are knocking on my door and that will be the time I will consider myself a dead man.

As I was leaving police station I asked the police officer for a favor that please don't send letters or anything to my house and If you guys need me to report to you just call me and I will come. This is pretty much everything happened in the interview.

Thanks for all of you for your support.
Regards.

**lifeinruins** · 9 November 2018, 06:42 PM

Hi everyone,
Just to let you guys know that I am a free man now. Got a call from police this morning saying that they can't prove the allegation against me so they have now decided to take it no further. I can't explain how happy I am now. Feels like I am alive again. I will do my best to stay miles away from these life threatening situations in future.

I would like to give big thumbs up to all of you guys who are contributing to get people their lives back and give them courage to go through this terrible ordeal. This forum and its contributors have provided me with valuable information which was imperative regarding my case and most importantly the encouragement from you guys.

I honestly understand everyone on this forum going through difficult time for falsely accused of rape and I wish you good luck and quick resolution of your cases.

All of you have a joyful weekend.
Thank you all,
Regards.

Announcement

I am falsely accused of rape by someone who had consensual sex with me for money.

I am falsely accused of rape by someone who had consensual sex with me for money.

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