Accused of raping a male

[Marish]

4 months ago, I invited a guy into my home. we are both gay. I believed this was a long term partner.
After only 24 hours, he turned crazy so eventually and reluctantly, I asked him to leave.
He attacked me and hurt me badly. Blood was pouring out of one eye and I am now blind in one eye.
He had no injuries.
He pleaded guilty, but, 3 months later has changed his plea to not guilty.
He claims I was raping him.
This has destroyed me. I have lost all confidence and am terrified of everything.
I cant work as I'm a computer technician.
I hardly go out now and so scared that others will think I'm capable of rape.
The Police give the allegation no credence.

[Casehardened]

He pleaded guilty, but, 3 months later has changed his plea to not guilty.

Hello and welcome to the forum,

To help members offer relevant advice, is your accuser currently in the process of undergoing a trial for the assault on yourself (but not yet sentenced?) and has put forward the accusation of rape as a defence?

Also have you been interviewed by the police in relation to this accusation against yourself?

[Marish]

False accusation

He is in Jail as the Police objected to bail. The Police have not taken a further statement from me as they simply do not believe him. This was the first mention of this allegation. Nothing when arrested or interviewed.
He is charged with ABH.
I am not worried about being charged, as I did not do it and the Police know that. But the stigma of being accused !! It will no doubt be in the papers and some people will think there is no smoke without fire.
This has destroyed me. For someone to be so evil.
Before this allegation, I had forgiven him. I even wrote a victim statement urging them not to Jail him, but to force him to have treatment as he is clearly mentally unwell.
He tried to gouge both my eyes out with his thumbs. He bit me and took a chunk out of my arm.
I don't sleep now. The odd hour or so, but no more.

I am so frightened, I never answer the door.
His trial is 7th December. 72 Days.
And Thank you.

[Casehardened]

Thank you for your reply and clarification and I surmise that your distress is due to the worry of having to give evidence at the forthcoming trial.

It may be that his legal team will be able to advise him against making this false accusation of rape in court but just in case you should be prepared for questioning from his barrister. The fact that he has caused you loss of sight will indicate to the court and any journalists present that he is indeed deranged and the accusation is false. Obviously it will become public knowledge that you are gay but presumably this is of less concern than the suggestion that you are capable of rape?

Many members on here will identify with the initial shock and horror of such an accusation, but believe me, these feelings do diminish with time. Of more concern is the lack of sleep and I would suggest a visit to your GP. If you explain the situation they may be able to prescribe something to help you through the next couple of weeks.

[Marish]

Thank you

Thank you.

I am not ashamed of being gay but obviously, would prefer it not plastered over the papers.

I feel for each and every individual wrongly accused of this heinous crime.

The sentences for false allegations should be much stiffer as they destroy lives.

Thank you again for your kind support.

Marish

[Casehardened]

Do keep reading and posting on the basis that a problem shared......most folks don't realise until it occurs how common these misguided accusations are.

NB. don't post anything identifying as the forum is open to view.

[Marish]

Have to forgive

The hatred is destroying me

[Franticwithworry]

Anger, even hatred, is a normal and reasonable reaction to this kind of experience, but you don't :have to focus on it exclusively or let the feelings destroy you.

It's important that you have other things to do and to focus on and it takes (hard) work to survive this, but survive it you can. These intense feelings will subside over time, though you may need some help from your doctor or some counselling.

Hang in there! It does get easier, it really does.

[Marish]

A little better

I feel a little less hatred today. Ive been to the cathedral two days running, and though not religious, have found some spiritual peace

[Franticwithworry]

I feel a little less hatred today. Ive been to the cathedral two days running, and though not religious, have found some spiritual peace

That's good to hear. We all need peace and it can be surprising where we find it.

[Marish]

A weight lifted

The lady vicar put her hand on my back and prayed. It was like a weight lifted.

Maybe there is someone upstairs.

[lazy lass]

What ever brings you peace, solice and comfort will help you through this ordeal, what ever it takes grasp it with both hands and believe in it.
There will be light at the end of the tunnel

[Marish]

I now believe it.

Before my past career, I was a successful Private Investigator.

I specialised in criminal defence.

Happy to share any skills I have with your members.