Please help

[MrB]

Hi ,I left my ex partner in Aug 2016 who was an alcoholic and violent and abusive towards me. She was also under the mental health services.After 2 years of her abuse I finally got out of the relationship and she didn't want me to leave ,she would send me gifts for at least a month after I left her and beg me to move back in.I refused and she told me I had ruined her life. She wanted me to give her money towards the upkeep of our dogs which I was happy to do and I thought I could move on. I then went on the same dating website that I had met her and soon realised she was making fake profiles to talk to me and mess with my mind. it became so obvious it was her that I told her I would report her to the police if she didn't leave me alone and then blocked her on my mobile so she couldn't contact me.That was a couple of months ago and I have now met someone else.
Then on Tuesday last week the police came to my house and arrested me for rape and I spent the night in a police cell. I then spoke to the duty solicitor and after telling him what I had been through with this woman he advised me to tell the police everything which I did in interview.She has alleged that on a couple of occasions in 2016 when she was drunk or had taken sleeping tablets I had undressed her and had sex with her without her consent and taken video and pictures of the act. The police have my cell phone and laptop for forensic investigation which could take 2 months and I know there is some stuff on there of us having sex but its obvious that she knows whats happening and is enjoying it.
What I need to know is should I wait before contacting a solicitor until I hear from the police again and if so would I get legal aid for something like this? I have never been in trouble with the police before and do not earn a lot of money .
The duty solicitor also told me he didn't think it would go to court but I do not know if I should believe him.
As you can imagine I am extremely worried and I barely sleep and eat.
I have told my new partner what has happened and luckily she is very understanding.
Thanks for reading, I would be grateful for any help or advice .

[hello88]

Hi ,I left my ex partner in Aug 2016 who was an alcoholic and violent and abusive towards me. She was also under the mental health services.After 2 years of her abuse I finally got out of the relationship and she didn't want me to leave ,she would send me gifts for at least a month after I left her and beg me to move back in.I refused and she told me I had ruined her life. She wanted me to give her money towards the upkeep of our dogs which I was happy to do and I thought I could move on. I then went on the same dating website that I had met her and soon realised she was making fake profiles to talk to me and mess with my mind. it became so obvious it was her that I told her I would report her to the police if she didn't leave me alone and then blocked her on my mobile so she couldn't contact me.That was a couple of months ago and I have now met someone else.
Then on Tuesday last week the police came to my house and arrested me for rape and I spent the night in a police cell. I then spoke to the duty solicitor and after telling him what I had been through with this woman he advised me to tell the police everything which I did in interview.She has alleged that on a couple of occasions in 2016 when she was drunk or had taken sleeping tablets I had undressed her and had sex with her without her consent and taken video and pictures of the act. The police have my cell phone and laptop for forensic investigation which could take 2 months and I know there is some stuff on there of us having sex but its obvious that she knows whats happening and is enjoying it.
What I need to know is should I wait before contacting a solicitor until I hear from the police again and if so would I get legal aid for something like this? I have never been in trouble with the police before and do not earn a lot of money .
The duty solicitor also told me he didn't think it would go to court but I do not know if I should believe him.
As you can imagine I am extremely worried and I barely sleep and eat.
I have told my new partner what has happened and luckily she is very understanding.
Thanks for reading, I would be grateful for any help or advice .

Hi Mr B

Sorry to see you here

I don't know if you have spent some time reading through other people's experiences. It is very hard to tell exactly what will happen, or how long. I see that you were arrested, which means you (should) have a bail date. On this bail date three things will happen rebail, nfa (no furthur action) or charge. When hubby and I went through the ordeal there seemed no point in contacting the solicitor unless you heard anymore from them or the police. In the meantime it is worth gathering as much 'stuff' as you can to prove your story. Look all through social media, your messages from the dating website and screenshot everything. Then store on a memory stick and ask someone you trust to look after a copy. Many people advise on here not to give any of the proof of your innocence to the police as they can get the accuser to change the date of the accusation or change certain aspects of it (this is much more common than you think)

I cannot advise if you get legal aid ect... but i can advise for you too keep strong and gather as much as you can, just in case. If you hear anything from the accuser, just try and keep the proof and never contact/speak back.

Keep Strong xx

[Rights Fighter]

It's at a very early stage - easy for me to say I know, but please try not to panic.

[MrB]

Thank you.
As of yet I haven't been given a bail date and the evidence I had of the dating website I kept on my phone which the police have.
Just don't know what to think but from what you have said and from what else I have read on here the police are always on the accusing side which I find very worrying .

[Rights Fighter]

Hold on to ALL evidence you have. Best not to give to the police as they could go back to the complainant, who will then change her story.

If they ask you in for a further interview, which area will it be in? I might be able to refer you to a recommended solicitor in the area.

[MrB]

I'm in Kent and that would be great thank you.

[Rights Fighter]

The person who can help is Harvey Fox http://www.freemanssolicitors.net/si...ile/harvey_fox

[hello88]

just a thought, could you log onto your dating accounts through another computer to download the messages (or maybe you have copies on email). If you can i suggest you do this sooner than later??

Keep strong xx

[Witchypoo69]

help

You can go to the library and log into your account Might be worth giving it a try

Witchypoo

[joebloggs]

This sounds exceptionally similar to a case I just came out the other side of.

First thing, as RF said. Try not to panic. When the police say two months they could take many more to come to a decision. Keep in contact with your duty solicitor. They will be able to chase the OIC for you if it begins tk take some time.

Again, as RF has said, withold as much evidence as you can at the moment. It is a known trick for the police to either take the evidence back to the accuser and allow them to make an addendunum to their statement or just flat out ignore it.

I spent the last two years of my life dreading the thought of prison for something I had not done. You will have highs and lows but do not be afraid to ask the solicitor to contact the police for an update. They forget their is two humans in this.

Compile a timeline of events, most phones back up texts and messenger service apps to a cloud storage such as icloud, have a look to see if there are conversations backed up their and whilst you can get into your dating site and see if there is a record of the conversations that you said have happened. Print all of those things off and highlight what is relevant to your defence.

If need be you can then fall back on this as a pre prepared defence and also solice in the knowledge that you have evidence to support you.

The police aren't your friends in this. No matter how many times they call you "mate"

Keep strong, jb