help!!!

[Oscar_Halpin]

Ive just been acused of raping a girl i had concentual sex with, I have just got out of the police station after having been there for 20hours and am really strugling to come to terms with what has happened. I have not been charged and the date for my next apperance at the police station is at the end of january which leaves me 2months of been unsure as to what will happen! also due to the fact that its someone I work with i have been suspended from my job indefinetly leaving me sat in my house constantly worrying. I have looked at every aspect of the law but my innocence still dosnt give me peace of mind. I feel that I cant tell anyone because of the stigma and am really just hoping for someone who has had the same expirence to talk to.
thanks

[Rights Fighter]

Hi Oscar

One thing you shouldn't really do is to leave your real name (I take it that is your name?) on an open forum.

I might be able to advise you further depending on which part of the UK you live in. Feel free to PM or email me from this site and hopefully I can help you from there.

Kind regards

RF

[utterlydestroyed]

Hi Oscar

I have personally been through the same hell of False Allegation.

I DO understand completely how you must be feeling right now. It is so completely overwhelming, traumatic and soul destroying.

Some thoughts you may like to consider.

1. Ensure that ANY witness information to your defence is gathered in writing and provided for your solicitor. In particular any leading up to or following the encounter.
2. Be aware the police DO NOT bother to interview witnesses to the defence or gather other material evidence which may assist you in your defence. (That is my personal experience) Do what ever you can to strengthen your case, DO NOT RELY on honesty or integrity of police, in my experience honest police officers are all but a myth!
3. Keep an ear to the ground via friends at work to any information which may help your case. (In my case there were both phone calls & text messeges sent by my accuser ADMITTING it was a FALSE allegation, I asked the recipient of one of the phone calls for a statement which they gave me in writing which I passed to my solicitor, I also gathered details about the text messeges, time sent, time recieved, on what numbers, err, ...and quite important, the content of the messages)
4. Say NOTHING to police, provide all your information only to your solicitor! Police will twist, fabricate, and misinform on ANY information you give them. Believe me, there is NO honesty, NO integrity, No Impartiality & No transparency of conduct amongst the MAJORITY of police officers I have personally had dealings with in these circumstances. You are now, as the accussed, the means for police to meet targets in trying to obtain a conviction...by fair means or foul on their part in my experience.
5. DO NOT under any circumstances have ANY contact with your accuser (mine tried ringing and texting me a number of times after they had made the allegation, I answered none of the calls, but kept the texts, as they were an actual ADMISSION of false allegation).

Have you looked up on the internet the Sexual Offences Act 2003 and the definition of RAPE. It is quite scary, but I personally felt it better to know what it was the police were trying to twist to enable them to try to obtain a prosecution.

The issue of consent is really tricky now and wide open to abuse by false accusers and corrupt police, to the point my house mate (incredibly supportive and one of the witnesses to consent that the police REFUSED to interview) now makes sure I have sexual consent forms in my bedside drawer (I kid you not!)..and whats more... I have since used them!

If I were you I'd re-register on this site, but with a non-de-plume, made up name. I happen to know through a police officer that police DO trawl these sites.

...and I know it sounds daft but, if you start feeling depressed, go for a walk, (physical excersie of just walking helps overcome depression) take yourself on a date with yourself and treat yourself to a cappachino in the most expensive coffee shop in town. (I would sometimes go to a local posh hotel £3.50/cup, but I just told myself I was worth treating).

Keep a day book/diary of where you go and with whom. Who calls you or you call, just in case you need to refer to it. If you have supportive friends, let them support you, it is traumatic!

good luck