What happens next?

[Stressed out mother]

So after waiting since september son has now been charged with two counts of rape and one of sexual assault. With date set for may 3 at magistrates court.
What can we expect, what can we do in the interim, and how do we keep it all together without breaking into little pieces?

[YearsOfHell]

Hi Hun.
Sorry to hear this.
It's a nightmare but you and he will get through this.
There's a sticky at the top of this page or click here:

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...wn-experience)

This is member "itsnotallbad"s experiences and may be helpful?

There's no magic potion to get through this but you will all pull together and will get through.
Remember, her lies haven't been questioned before and she will find that court is not a nice place to be when you're lying!
Stay strong - you're doing amazing!

YoH

[Franticwithworry]

So after waiting since september son has now been charged with two counts of rape and one of sexual assault. With date set for may 3 at magistrates court.
What can we expect, what can we do in the interim, and how do we keep it all together without breaking into little pieces?

Last things first - you'll keep it all together and not break into little pieces because that's what you've been doing up to now. You CAN do it and you can CONTINUE to do it. This is just the next step for you in the sorry saga, and it's your son's opportunity to state his case. As YearsofHell said, the accuser hasn't been questioned yet and this is the start of the lies showing holes.

Hopefully, you've been creating a timeline and getting bits and pieces of information together for a defence, but when you get to see the accuser's statement is when the real work starts and when your son knows for sure what the details of the accusation against him are. The link YearsofHell hell mentioned and a good lawyer will give guidance as to what kinds of evidence will help too. Continue browsing the forum too.

The magistrates date is a formality and a sort of rehearsal for court dates to come. It will be short and formal, because the magistrate will simply refer the case to the Crown Court. All your son has to do is dress smartly, be respectful and confirm his name and address at this first hearing.

It's all hellishly frightening, but you will get through it and your son's solicitor should keep him appraised of the process. If in doubt - ask - the solicitor or here or both. I hope you've chosen a solicitor with experience of false accusations. There are good ones who work both privately and legally aided.

Come back here often - the coming weeks and months are an emotional roller coaster but there are many here who will help as much as they can.

[Stressed out mother]

I understand the need to produce a timeline, but one accusation is just a time between dates dates, so vague its unreal. Plus how can you prove anything when all it comes down to is he said she said?
We grew up believing it was always innocent until proven guilty with the onus for prosecution to prove guilt. Everything I read here flips that around. How can one person be called the victim before proof of the event is even made?
Before I am able to fully help my son i have to be able to sort myself out. I know it cannot help when all I do is think about what's happened and what can happen if we fail to prove his innocence..
At dark times the thought did he do this aweful thing rears its head. I know this act is not something he would do, but even the definition of the word rape seems to have changed. From taking by force against a persons will to a meaning far more vague!
Once we meet with the solicitor hopefully the way to fight this will become clearer. Considering when this all started the then duty solicitor said there was no case, as did police who questioned him. How it then gets to this point is something we find hard to ccomprehend.
Thank god for here, at least there is hope and support. I see the successes, but how many fail to prove their innocence against these malicious ffenales?

[Staystrong1]

I understand the need to produce a timeline, but one accusation is just a time between dates dates, so vague its unreal. Plus how can you prove anything when all it comes down to is he said she said?
We grew up believing it was always innocent until proven guilty with the onus for prosecution to prove guilt. Everything I read here flips that around. How can one person be called the victim before proof of the event is even made?
Before I am able to fully help my son i have to be able to sort myself out. I know it cannot help when all I do is think about what's happened and what can happen if we fail to prove his innocence..
At dark times the thought did he do this aweful thing rears its head. I know this act is not something he would do, but even the definition of the word rape seems to have changed. From taking by force against a persons will to a meaning far more vague!
Once we meet with the solicitor hopefully the way to fight this will become clearer. Considering when this all started the then duty solicitor said there was no case, as did police who questioned him. How it then gets to this point is something we find hard to ccomprehend.
Thank god for here, at least there is hope and support. I see the successes, but how many fail to prove their innocence against these malicious ffenales?

Hi there
So sorry to hear of this awful ordeal for you your son and your family. Totally get where you are coming from as to he said , she said. But reading your posts there seems to be loads of discrepancies you can hi lite. This is where a timeline is key. It will draw any details of note out. Facebook, photos, whereabouts anything that will help as the Barrister in my OH dase said the devil is in in the detail. I hope you have a solicitor who is experienced in FA of this nature as this is imperative. Also,keep,in mind that the FA has not been doubted or questioned yet, she sounds a truly awful,individual it's all been one sided so far that's why you feel so helpless. You must look after yourself though as you need to be strong to support your son. I had the same thoughts as you and the whole thing made me very ill initially but you can get through this. Go through the prosecution disclosure with a fine tooth comb and high light every lie, no matter how small and do the time line to help prove the lies this was key at OH
trial.
Sending you strength to get through this.x

[Stressed out mother]

I understand the need to produce a timeline, but one accusation is just a time between dates dates, so vague its unreal. Plus how can you prove anything when all it comes down to is he said she said?
We grew up believing it was always innocent until proven guilty with the onus for prosecution to prove guilt. Everything I read here flips that around. How can one person be called the victim before proof of the event is even made?
Before I am able to fully help my son inhave to be able to sort myself out. I know it cannot help when all I do is think about what's happened and what can happen if we fail to prove his innocence..
At dark times the thought did he do this aweful thing rears its head. I know this act is not something he would do, but even the definition of the word rape seems to have changed. From taking by force against a persons will to a meaning far more vague!
Once we meet with the solicitor hopefully the way to fight this will become clearer. Considering when this all started the then duty solicitor said there was no case, as did police who questioned him. How it then gets to this point is something we find hard to c comprehend.
Thank god for here, at least there is hope and support. I see the successes, but how many fail to prove their innocence against these malicious females?

[Peter1975]

There is a certain amount of truth in the perception that you are guilty until proven innocent but in a court of law the prosecution do indeed still have to prove their case, beyond a reasonable doubt. The defence only has to undermine the prosecution case rather than prove innocence.

SS and FWW give excellent advice on how to do this.

Most sexual acts (consensual or not ) take place in private and there is often no other evidence than the first hand witness accounts, so even a genuine case will come down to just one word against another and the jury will have to decide on who is telling the truth.

Your son will be consistent because he is telling the truth. Liars are often exposed in the witness box.

If the jury is not sure which one is telling the truth, they must acquit.

Statistically the odds are always in favour of an acquittal and being well prepared will increase those odds.

Hang in there, we are all on your side.

[Franticwithworry]

Hi again,

Please don't fret about statistics; just know that, overall, with good preparation and a good solicitor,the odds are in your favour.

The timeline thing is a puzzle and confusing, especially when accusations are vague, but it might help to understand how useful it can be if I give you some examples. Before you know the full details of the accusation, you're gathering stuff on an 'in case' basis. So, for example, if you screenshot things on facebook showing her partying and having a good time, it's saved in case she later claims in her statement that the trauma of the rapes/assaults is turning her into a recluse who can't have fun anymore. It could be that she claims any manner and number of things that social media or your own experience can demonstrate otherwise.

Equally, if she is claiming assaults in a long, vague timespan, having a clear recollection of where you were living, what the relationship was like at that time, etc can be very helpful. Liars often have very poor memories. I can think of examples where accusers have claimed that the assaults happened at a particular address where it can be shown that the defendant didn't live at the address until months/years later or moved out months/years before. Or they describe the interior of the building where assaults supposedly took place totally inaccurately. Or the furnishings inaccurately where the defendant has dated photographs to show the discrepancies. Or that it happened on dates when it can be shown that the defendant was out of the country. Those are really obvious examples, and I doubt any apply to you, but every case of false accusations has its own nuances that a good solicitor and barrister can make good use of.

All sorts of discrepancies can show up when you get to read the accuser's statement and if you've done much of the work of refreshing your memory those discrepancies will jump out at you.

It's awful when it ends up being one person's word against another, I know, but your son is telling the truth and his story will not vary. It's the defence job to cast doubt on the prosecution's version of events and thats not always as difficult as it seems.

Unfortunately many people get told by the police that the case will go nowhere, and later find themselves in court. The police have no business saying that, because they don't make the decision. It gives people false hope and I think it's cruel. In my more cynical moments, I think they hope people will incriminate themselves, but that's just me. :-)

[Stressed out mother]

I have to agree about the police pllaying friendly to try to get the guard down to incriminate yourself. I have also sadly come to the conclusion that CPS drag their feet in order to rattle the accussed, to the point of them questioning themselves not to mention forgetting what happened the dates in question. Heck i am at the point in life when i go upstairs and cant rembember why!
I would like to thank everyone who has replied to my posts for their help and support. Its thanks to you and you alone that i am getting to the point of being able to once again be the steadt supporter that my son needs!
When he came out from being charged he was saying how he was repeatedly being asked if he was suicidal or depressed... Duh!!! They were saying are you sure you arent suicidal? There are help if you are!! Like they care after putting him through the stress of so many cancelled appointments! As he said..its none of their damned business how i feel!! Think they were hoping he would say yes i want to kill myself!!
Thanks for the suggestion of screen shots of her having a good time, have seen her posts on fb at parties and just thought...lucky you getting on with your life!! Of course typical the further you go back on fb the more times it crashes out!!
Once again thank you all so much, i hope to one day be able to repay by helping someone else get through this horrible experience. Not that anyone should ever have to go through this!! Hopefully one day the justice system will srart looking at ways to prevent these accusers being able to get away scott free as they do at present.

[KB19]

Hi Stressed out mother
I am a Mum too and can only imagine how this must be effecting you , as mums we just want to cuddle them and make it all no matter how old they are , I agree the whole system needs sorting and think I read somewhere here if they stopped compensation as they have in other countries which saw a high percentage drop in cases it may help a little .
Important to keep talking or finding out how your son is feeling too . Remember to take a few minutes you time too , as I know with my OH it does completely drain and consume you at times . Take care .

[Stressed out mother]

Well we have now seen the solicitor again. He said he just cannot understand why CPS have decided to convict as in his opinion there is no case to be answered!! He explained the magistrates on 3/5 is a formality. Then we will be a crown court 28 days later once again to put in the not guilty plea. But then the bad news because he told us it will be months before the case is heard and could in fact be next year!! He fully expects not guilty/ acquittal result.
We will be having a meeting with barrister in next month. He has told us to remain positive.
I just hope that this will go as he expects at this moment.

[Franticwithworry]

We had two FA's to deal with and the first one came to the court date and fell at the first hurdle when the judge and prosecution agreed that no crime had been committed - a complete waste of time, effort and money, but 'policy' to take the matter before a court because a minor was involved. The system is broken.

It was also very quick from charge to trial. I hope it isn't months and months for you. It depends on time available in the court in question, but you do need some time to prepare properly. The solicitor sounds to be on the ball, and I hope the meeting with the barrister is fruitful.

Hang in there - we're here as long as needed.

[Stressed out mother]

Next steps

So have now done the magistrates court. As everyone has said, the waiting and the unknown was far worse than the actual event.
Solicitor has received copy of FA interview!!! It is like a fairy story. She now says in the past that she had to attend hospital due to having a chair thrown at her! Considering the type of chairs we have at the property my son must have been working out as they are all to big and heavy to lift, let alone throw.
Her now partner was also interviewed and said she had told him about being preciously attacked and raped by my son. He then goes on to say he didn't know she was going to spend the night at my sons but at her mothers. But then says in next sentence that my son was supposed to takes her to her mothers!!
Have to admit to feeling more confident as all these comments can be proven as fiction.
Yet again solicitor tells us to remain confident.
Son appears at crown court for plea on may31.

[Stressed out mother]

Update of case - looking for others experiences

Well as everyone has said the Magistrates court was no more than a formality. Have to wonder at the respect that some people give the place as the way so many people were dressed to attend court was unbelievable!!
Son has now seen the Barrister and we have passed him all the information regarding timelines of when the poisoned dwarf was around!! He said that we had found far more information than they would have been able to, although a large proportion of it would not be used.
Our legal team is still waiting to receive transcripts of all the interviews undertaken by the police. At present we are pleading on a case that doesnt even fully state the exact nature of the charges. Yes it specifies two cases of rape and one sexual assault, but there is no dates on at least one of the accusations.
The barrister like the solicitor says that there is no case and he expects it to be thrown out. The one transcript they have received is from her present boyfriend and within two sentences he changes his story!!
Apparently on being re-interviwed she also accuses another ex of sexual assault!! Our barrister wants to know if this accusation has been looked into with a charge. As he said if not, why not and if it has then both legal teams will be working together to prove that she is lying. One way or another, someone else is soon to have their luves ruined by this female!!
Part of me feels happy and confident due to the comments made by our legal team, but on the other hand I feel worried that we and they might become too complacent and it all blw up in ur faces with the worst possible outcome!
What has been the experiences of people here in this situation?
We go to the crown ourt for the plea on May 31 but have been warned that it will be a long wait until the case is heard.

[liars on fire]

Well as everyone has said the Magistrates court was no more than a formality. Have to wonder at the respect that some people give the place as the way so many people were dressed to attend court was unbelievable!!
Son has now seen the Barrister and we have passed him all the information regarding timelines of when the poisoned dwarf was around!! He said that we had found far more information than they would have been able to, although a large proportion of it would not be used.
Our legal team is still waiting to receive transcripts of all the interviews undertaken by the police. At present we are pleading on a case that doesnt even fully state the exact nature of the charges. Yes it specifies two cases of rape and one sexual assault, but there is no dates on at least one of the accusations.
The barrister like the solicitor says that there is no case and he expects it to be thrown out. The one transcript they have received is from her present boyfriend and within two sentences he changes his story!!
Apparently on being re-interviwed she also accuses another ex of sexual assault!! Our barrister wants to know if this accusation has been looked into with a charge. As he said if not, why not and if it has then both legal teams will be working together to prove that she is lying. One way or another, someone else is soon to have their luves ruined by this female!!
Part of me feels happy and confident due to the comments made by our legal team, but on the other hand I feel worried that we and they might become too complacent and it all blw up in ur faces with the worst possible outcome!
What has been the experiences of people here in this situation?
We go to the crown ourt for the plea on May 31 but have been warned that it will be a long wait until the case is heard.

From my experience it is an emotional roller coaster, some days are better than others. I would advise to continue to gather information if you can particularly when you receive the statements from the complainant and other witnesses. It is important not to let your mind wander into a dark place but that is only natural in the circumstances.

In our situation the allegations made were clearly nonsense and that was the frustrating part. It seemed that the authorities applied no logic to the circumstances. There will be times when you are likely to feel that you are going mad, but you are not it is simply trying to adapt to a mad illogical situation.

As the trial date approaches if there is a trial, I believe it is best to expect one, tensions will mount, just keep talking. As a family you need trusted friends around you that you can talk to as and when. You never know when you are going to have a bad day. I found that often news on the television about sexual crimes caused a lot of anxiety particularly if the person was found guilty.

The problem with allegations of sexual crimes are that they have such stigma attached so you are not able to discuss your feelings outside of those you trust.

It is a life changing experience as a family our trial was in six weeks ago so we are still in the recovery process which is an emotional roller coaster as well. What this experience does drum home is that relationships and standing together are the most important aspects in life.
I would add that if you have other children in your family don't forget them. They too are facing a traumatic experience. They would have seen the adults in their lives crumble before their eyes which would be so traumatic for them.