How do I help my son?

[worried mom]

Before I start I would like to say Thank you for reading this,and although I know you cant solve my problem, I would be grateful for some understanding of what the worst case sinario is for my son.

My son has been accused of sexual assult? His cousin has said that he touched her and made her touch him (dont want to go into details)
This apparently happened from 2005-2012 . Making my son 11-18 and her 7-14 years old.
It was supposed to of taken place when my ex took him to see his family,so I was not there.

My son is now 23 and expecting his 1st child in July.

My son has severe dyslexia and word understanding issues( he dont understand big words( dont know if that is relivant))

He went to the police station for an interview,being told by the police he didnt need a solisitor (but could have one if he wanted ),as it would just make this longer to sort out.
Hes very trustworthy so took their word ,big mistake I know.

They told him it was his word against hers and would probably be dropped. Fast forward 6 weeks and the CPS have decided that he must go to court.

I have now sorted him a solisitor,so that part is covered.Apparently the only evidence they need is her statement.

As you can imagine this is devistating to all of us.He is so confused as he didnt do any of this....he didnt even have a girlfriend till he was 17,he wasnt interested in girls.

As a mother I am desperate to help him. He has anxiety and depression issues already,Im so worried for him.

He is convinced that even though he has not done anything(and the though sickens him) that because she was so young and being female,that he will be found guilty because of her statement. He has no clue how he can prove this all to be wrong.

Nobody is telling him anything at the moment....like will he be charged as an adult? what is the worst case sinario? How long could he get in prison? ( He wouldnt last 5 mins in prison)

He has to go to court april 10th and will see his solisiter the week before,once they have all the transcripts from his and her statements.

Please help me, im desprate for information on how to prepare for the worst.

Sorry for my bad spelling and thank you for reading x

I posted this in introducting also,but I think I posted in the wrong place,sorry

[YearsOfHell]

Hi Worried Mom
Sorry to hear this.
Your son needs two things.
His mental health is vital so please get him to get some help.
First stop GP.
This is happening and he needs to be in tip top form.
Next thing he needs right now is a specialist solicitor, one who has a proven record of helping in these kinds of allegations.
There's a thread here:

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...ist-solicitors


Also, although I don't know much about the legality of these cases, due to the age he was when this allegedly took place, this may help:

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...0-Doli-Incapax

There's no escaping the nightmare that these allegations are, so take a deep breath and prepare for battle!

YoH

[worried mom]

Thank you for your reply.
Ive told him to go and see his doctor again,so hopefully that will help him a little.
I have a solisitor in place for him who deals with these type of cases a lot.
He can already prove that he was never alone with the girl after the age of 17 ,as his girlfriend went everywhere with him at that time and his father can verify.
Although we have not been asked to provide anything at this time.
So so worried that he will not get the chance to prove himself.

So thankful for your reply,I think im in panic mode at the moment.

[YearsOfHell]

The police won't be interested in anything that helps prove your sons innocence.
Their job is to build a case against him.
Although there are some police officers who have been fair, it seems that the vast majority will not be helpful in making a defence.
Some have even been known to "lose" evidence that has been provided when it doesn't support the prosecution.
Be guided by your solicitor.
It's up to your son how to proceed but it often is the case that if you've got something that puts doubt in the case, its best to hit the prosecution with it at trial.
If it's offered now, the police can go back to the complainant and they can change their story in order to fit the new information, then you have nothing for defence and their case against him is stronger.
Your son, in contrast, will be told very little detail about the allegation, often until the first day of court!
It's good that he has your support,
This will make a big difference to him getting through this.
Try not to panic, you'll get through it.
YoH

[worried mom]

Thank you yoh.
Its so frustrating not being able to do anything to help.
Im wondering does anybody know the worst case sinario for him if he is charged?Sentence time?
Will this get discussed with him at any point?
Sorry for so many questions,just want to be ready for the worst and hope for the best.

[Peter1975]

Hello worried mom,

I'm so sorry that you find yourself here and I am angered that the cps have decided to take this case forward. sadly, it is far too common these days.

The fact is that often in even genuine sexual assault cases, there is little to no supporting or corroborating evidence and the word of a complainant is first hand witness testimony, which is a vital part of our justice system. This means that it is open to abuse by those that are wicked or deluded enough to lie and the political situation of our "victims rights" culture means that cases that would not have got to court in the past, such as your sons, are all too often turning lives upside down.

You should retain every hope that this will result in a NG verdict. You do not specify the charges or the dates on the indictment, but I am supposing that the earlier ones would be excluded and they would be dealt with as juvenile offences anyway.

Being interviewed without a solicitor present was unwise but does show a certain amount of innocence and demonstrates his trusting nature and that he had nothing to hide. . The police, sadly can never be trusted.

Experience tells us that court, although daunting, can often be a place of truth and if the false accuser has been given an easy ride in making the accusations, they will not get one in court. many lies unravel completely in the witness box.

As for worst case scenarios, no one can possibly say. I recommend you try not to look too far ahead.I would neither wish to give you false hope or fill you with dread. We do recommend here that you prepare for the worst and hope for the best and so, yes, a custodial sentence is possible, depending on the charges, but by no means a certainty and should be considered a remote possibility at this stage. . It's important that you maintain a sense of perspective and remember that you will have a good chance to defend this.

Standard advice is that you stalk the FA social media and take screenshots of their posts. Do not make contact with the FA. Write down everything you can remember about this girl and keep a notebook with you in case anything else pops into your mind. You will know more once you get the prosecution papers. Do not worry about the initial court appearances in themselves. They are formalities and will give you and your son a chance to speak to your lawyers.

Come back as often as you need for support and advice. Someone will be here to listen.

[myheartisbroken]

My heart aches for you, sorry you have had to find this site but it is a godsend so much information and advice.

Our case is very similar to yours, my son being fasley acussed when he was 11 years old he's now 18. No evidence just her word. It's all so wrong.

We are in the middle of our trial and unfortunately your son will be put on trial as an adult as he is over 18. Do not give anything to the police keep everything you have for your legal team.

I will not lie it has been the hardest week of our lives hopefully we have an outcome on Monday, you will get through it, I didn't think I could but I've found strength knowing my son at 11 years old could not possibly do what he's been accused of, not then and not now he is innocent just like your son is.

Stay strong for your boy even though they are adults they will always be our babies! Be there for him as i know you will be, we are mothers that's our job!

Feel free to ask anything if you need to, visit this site regularly it really does help xx

[worried mom]

Peter thank you for your response,Im so glad im not alone.And I am listening to your advice too.Thank you

Myheartsbroken I am crying after reading your post. Its so sad that they can be trialed as an adult.
I feel the same way you do,I know this was just not possible for my son to have done,and Im so angry that someone could even think of accusing him of such a horrid thing.

I will keep coming back on here and hopefully see a good result for your son. Thank you