World falling apart

[DUBious]

So, yesterday, we had a knock at the door and a DC was standing there, he said there was a problem and asked to come in, after asking to speak with my son, he informed us that an accusation had been made against my 15 year old son of rape. Following on from confiscating his mobile phone, I sat my son down and asked (explained the need for him to) tell me the whole truth and everything that had happened on the night in question.

The sexual encounter involves a girl from his school who is 14 and they had consensual sex on the night of the party (back in May)

Initially I wanted to get him to make his statement that same day, but after a moment of clarity I decided against that and told the officer I would be seeking legal advice, later yesterday we visited a solicitor and took paid advice and instructed him to act on our behalf. Phew I think, that seems to be the right thing to do.

So now,myself, my wife and more importantly my son have this hanging over our heads for god knows how long.

The story is rather a long one of the nights events from my sons side, but I will write the highlights.

He went to a party and upon arriving the girl in question offered both my son and his friend a Tit wank (please excuse the language, but this is what was said) if they opened their bottles of alcohol. Later in the party she was seen by all running around with her breasts out, following on from this and after kissing my son, she led him upstairs to a bedroom and they began engaging in the build up to sex, someone walked in on them, so they stopped. She then led my son down the stairs and outside, when outside and around the corner, they did engage in sex, she went on top. After this, she went back to the party, and my son came home as he had a time we told him to be back by.

The next day she texts my son asking what happened the night before, he responded with, we had sex. She then told him she didn't want to talk to him again, then months later she starts spreading rumours at school that he raped her.....and now, I can only assume her parents found out and contacted the police, they have turned up at our door.

We have taken legal advice as I said, but what more should I be doing before the initial interview ? Would a polygraph test be useful ? I'm more than happy to pay the £400-500 for this to prove my sons innocence if it would help.

Appreciate any advice as I am already losing sleep over this probable nightmare no parent expects.

[Rights Fighter]

Can you please post again and this time do not give explicit details. They really are not necessary. Also in short paragraphs so that those of us with problems can read it easily.

Thanks.

[Casehardened]

Can you please post again and this time do not give explicit details. They really are not necessary. Also in short paragraphs so that those of us with problems can read it easily.

Thanks.

I will split the paragraphs up but I do think the details of the encounter are relevant in that they show that the alcohol which was presumably consumed by both parties was probably a factor.

As you know, we have had much more graphic explicicity (is there such a word) on the forum

[DUBious]

Sorry if I misunderstood the forum rules, I just wanted to be clear on certain points. I could have been far more explicit about other things the girl did and said, but it tried to only include the pertinent items that for me signify her actions led to and show consent.
And to be 100% clear! my son is adamant that she was the instigator and wanted sex! it was his first time so he was quite embarrassed at the time.

[Casehardened]

Hi,

As you have wisely already sought legal advice you are probably now aware that technically statuary rape has occurred so in a way the girl is right however do note the caveat below:

It should be noted that where both parties to sexual activity are under 16, then they may both have committed a criminal offence. However, the overriding purpose of the legislation is to protect children and it was not Parliaments intention to punish children unnecessarily or for the criminal law to intervene where it was wholly in appropriate. Consensual sexual activity between, for example, a 14 or 15 year-old and a teenage partner would not normally require criminal proceedings in the absence of aggravating features. The relevant considerations include:

the respective ages of the parties;

the existence and nature of any relationship

their level of maturity;

whether any duty of care existed;

whether there was a serious element of exploitation.

(from: http://www.cps.gov.uk/legal/v_to_z/youth_offenders/#a29 )



The justice system does now use polygraphs but only in establishing whether convicted offenders are in fact rehabilitated; I suspect they would not be interested in the results for the purpose of proving innocence.

From the above website his defence will be in establishing consensuality; it would be useful to make a list of other party-goers, especially any adults, in case statements from them are required.

Were the girl and your son in a relationship prior to or after the party? Can you think of any reason why she would make this allegation months afterwards rather than immediately?

There are quite a few past and current members of the forum who have had similar accusations against their sons; hopefully they may see your post and offer support.

[DUBious]

Hi,

As you have wisely already sought legal advice you are probably now aware that technically statuary rape has occurred so in a way the girl is right however do note the caveat below:

It should be noted that where both parties to sexual activity are under 16, then they may both have committed a criminal offence. However, the overriding purpose of the legislation is to protect children and it was not Parliaments intention to punish children unnecessarily or for the criminal law to intervene where it was wholly in appropriate. Consensual sexual activity between, for example, a 14 or 15 year-old and a teenage partner would not normally require criminal proceedings in the absence of aggravating features. The relevant considerations include:

the respective ages of the parties;

the existence and nature of any relationship

their level of maturity;

whether any duty of care existed;

whether there was a serious element of exploitation.

(from: http://www.cps.gov.uk/legal/v_to_z/youth_offenders/#a29 )



The justice system does now use polygraphs but only in establishing whether convicted offenders are in fact rehabilitated; I suspect they would not be interested in the results for the purpose of proving innocence.

From the above website his defence will be in establishing consensuality; it would be useful to make a list of other party-goers, especially any adults, in case statements from them are required.

Were the girl and your son in a relationship prior to or after the party? Can you think of any reason why she would make this allegation months afterwards rather than immediately?

There are quite a few past and current members of the forum who have had similar accusations against their sons; hopefully they may see your post and offer support.

Hi and thanks for responding, my son and the girl were not invokved prior to the party, but did know each other.

I am unsure why it has taken so long to come out, but I suspect, as she was telling everyone at school she had been raped (some months after) that the school got to hear about it and they involved either social services or the police.

So far I have asked my son to make a list of everyone present that he knows of, as well as documenting the events of the evening in his own words, I will then read it and explain where he needs to reword things or add more detail (as a typical teenager, he does not exactly articulate things well, hence my direction) but I can assure you all now, I will not be putting words in his mouth, just making sure he captures the facts and explains them as best as possible.
Other than this, we had the pre meeting with a local criminal law firm just to understand the process and ensure we have council present for the voluntary interview.

Both myself and my wife have grilled him on different occasions and whilst he may add things he previously forgot, his story remains constant.

[DUBious]

Update from my sons friends, after the alleged rape, my son came home as he had a time we told him to come back by, the girl in question went back into the party and offered the aforementioned breast masturbation to quite a few other lads ! My son has all their names, so hoping this is enough to dispel any suggestion that my son did anything wrong once the police have verified this.
In my opinion, and clearly I have never been through this, but I just can't imagine someone carrying on like that after being raped.

It's certainly eased my mind a little, but still have the old stomach turning over at the thought of what is to come.

[can it get worse]

H -sorry that you are in a position to find yourself on this forum.

I hope you and your family are coping as well as to be expected. The stress of this experience is awful. The shock is overwhelming sometimes. And the waiting and powerlessness is terrible.

I send best wishes to you and your son and his interview manages to clear things up for him.

[KB19]

Hi DUBious

Just wanted to say hi, as s mum and grandmother can only empathise with you over this horrible ordeal your son is in and for you too who just want to ' take all the pain away' as us mums do .

Hope that others come forward to explain there experiences with this FA , sounds like she has some deep mental health issues there ! , and wonder if your son has any mutual acquaintances that maybe useful for a sol to interview maybe ( no legal
Person in any form - just a thought I was having ) anyway keep posting s d hope it all sorts very soon for you both .

[DUBious]

Interview done and the girl has not even made a formal complaint. It turns out it was someone else that reported it, and whilst she has said sex was against her will, she is not willing to make an official complaint ! Hope she has learnt her lesson about starting rumours at school now.

Based on disclosure, she can't remember most of what happened that night at the party and has no idea where she and my son had sex.

My sons story is rock solid and has not changed from day one.

He has given a full list of people at the party who can verify her actions on the night and back up his story so fingers crossed this hell ends soon.