Advice appreciated

[Shaz27]

Lie detectors for all parties involved in these accusations.

Knew I'd think of something else

I think this suggestion is spot on. My sister and brother in law have been falsely accused by her sons ex, just disgusting and unvelievable for everyone who knows them. Supposedly their own granddaughter who is 5 now, but it was supposed to have happened when she was 3?? We cannot believe it is now in the hands of cps, they have had no support, only interviewed by police under caution, social services have not done their job professionally. All authority have been all for the lying accuser. Our whole family have been badly affected, we are very close, have grandchildren ourselves and cry for them not knowing if they are going to be charged as its been going on since September intially. If lie detectors were used, they would know immediately the ex is lying through her back teeth, and my sister wouldnt be going through this heartache and totally devastating time. My sister and her husband have had no support from the authorities throughout. Why oh why do the social services involve police without first getting the accuseds version of events. The system is so very wrong. Can anyone tell me how long the cps normally take to decide if charges will be brought or not and how will they be told, a letter? A phone call? House call. Any advice will be greatly appreciated

[Franticwithworry]

Hi Shaz27, I'm sorry you have to find yourself here, but welcome. I'm afraid from what I can make out there's no logic or standardisation as to how people are notified of CPS decisions. It seems to be something of a lottery, which is all the more nerve-wracking for people.

Social services can be a nightmare too. We are an older couple dealing with multiple accusations from multiple family members. Sometimes it seems as if the whole world has ganged up on us. It seems beyond unreasonable that no-one is interested in both sides of the story. Social services have been involved in our family too, but haven't bothered to speak to my man either. All anyone seems to want to do is to spin information so they can get a conviction, telling the person accused as little as possible along the way.

I'm sorry not to be more encouraging, but I'm finding that if I prepare for the worst and hope for the best it helps. I don't mean to portray nothing but doom and gloom, just to say that in this, there are some things that are unknowable. Trying to come to terms with that is a big task.

I understand what you say about lie detector tests, but honestly, they are not magic. If they were accurate, they'd be used in every court case. All they detect is nervousness, and there are so many variables - like does the subject believe they accurate - that they aren't really much use, legally speaking. Maybe in the future, if they are developed mire, but not yet.

I hope you get a decision soon. The waiting is torture, I know, but pop in here often if you can. There's lots of support and it's heartening to see when things go right for people. It gives us who are still waiting some hope.

[Shaz27]

Thank you so much franticwithworry. Its good to have someone to talk too, I know its my sister whos going through this nigntmare, but i am frantic with worry for her and her husband and the eventual outcome of these terrible lies if it does go to court. It affects the whole family in these situations. I understand you when you say the whole world seems to ve against you, I am sorry for you being in this situation.. I just cant get my head around why when ss become involved they dont talk to all parties concerned, the only ones wanting to talk were the police when they were interviewed under caution. It would never have got to that stage if they had bothered to try and sort it all before, but no, they believed everything the liar told them and its progressed from there.
Thank you again franticwithworry. I hope you will eventually have a happy outcome, as I hope my sister does