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  • Living a nightmare!

    Hi,

    New on here and in need of some help and advice.

    My partner was falsely accused of rape by a girl at his former company. He left the company a few months ago but still decided to attend the annual work Xmas party which was held at a hotel.

    Really not sure how to write this as I'm sure there will be bits missed out but here goes.

    He went to the party and planned to stay overnight in his friends room. He had an overnight bag with him which he was going to put in the cloakroom but this girl insisted he take her room key and put keep it in there which he did. I should mention that I met this girl at my partners leaving do and for some reason I didn't like her even then which is not like me as I usually don't judge people right away.

    Anyway he went on to enjoy the party with his work colleagues and the drinking was taken back to another girls room where there was quite a few of them. He then got tired and went to back to that girls room as he still had the key to get his stuff and use the loo.

    He first sat on the bed and finished his drink where at that point she came on to him and kissed him and tried to take his clothes off. He pushed her off and left the room. He then went to his friends room to sleep. In the morning he called the girl to ask for his washbag which was left in her room and she hung up on him twice while telling him to F off.

    The party was on a Thursday and he was arrested on a Saturday night and taken to the station to be interviewed. They didn't interview him until the Sunday as I was told by the police officer when I called up that he was sleeping so they didn't want to disturb him.

    He was truthful in what he said even remembered the little things like her room number which she couldn't even recall. Only thing is he didn't ask for a solicitor as he didn't think he needed one at the time. His first bail date was at the end of Feb which they postponed to this Friday.

    We are going besides ourselves with worry especially as we are due to get married in a few months time and putting things on hold until this nightmare ends. Trying to remain positive but find myself thinking the worst.

    As soon as she made this false accusation she was seen on snapchat the next day singing and laughing and since then she is all over social media enjoying her life, wearing provocative clothes and going on holidays like nothing happened. Whereas we have out our lives on hold. I have been told by my friends who work with her that she is acting like nothing has happened. Really trying to keep strong for my partner but keep thinking that I won't be able to go on if the worst should happen.

    FYI he has a solicitor now which is a family friend. Any advice will be much appreciated. Not sure what to expect at the bail date?
    Last edited by Casehardened; 18 May 2016, 06:17 PM. Reason: Split into paragraphs for easier reading.

  • #2
    Really sorry you find your self in this situation, if she accused him of rape almost straight after then there should be DNA so personally I think you would have nothing at all to worry about.

    Comment


    • #3
      Yes they did take DNA samples from both of them but if it was that clean cut then they wouldn't be taking this long would they?

      Comment


      • #4
        Sorry but I can't read big blocks of text
        People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

        PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Rights Fighter View Post
          Sorry but I can't read big blocks of text
          Now split up......
          'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

          Comment


          • #6
            Terrible situation and completely wrong. Ideally, your partner should have got a solicitor. I know you say he is innocent but a solicitor is there to protect his rights and advise him legally.

            You might be in for a bit of a wait while the Police look into the matter but I would suggest you keep copies of any online posts particularly ones referring to the party. Would any of your partners colleagues at his previous employer be willing to make a statement to the Police to support his story and draw attention the fact she is behaving like nothing has happened. It sounds very vendictive and spiteful behaviour. I hope the truth comes out she is a liar.

            Comment


            • #7
              Their is no DNA evidence at all in my sons case but his trial starts a week on tuesday. The system stinks he was rebailed 3 times agter being told it want looking as serious as first thought the cps charged him. This forum really has been a God send to me. Stay strong x

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Casehardened View Post
                Now split up......
                Have to say possibly the worst advice I've had but thanks....

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by slowdown73 View Post
                  Terrible situation and completely wrong. Ideally, your partner should have got a solicitor. I know you say he is innocent but a solicitor is there to protect his rights and advise him legally.

                  You might be in for a bit of a wait while the Police look into the matter but I would suggest you keep copies of any online posts particularly ones referring to the party. Would any of your partners colleagues at his previous employer be willing to make a statement to the Police to support his story and draw attention the fact she is behaving like nothing has happened. It sounds very vendictive and spiteful behaviour. I hope the truth comes out she is a liar.
                  Yes he should have had one at the time but I think he was in a state of shock.
                  The police has spoken to one of his ex colleagues/friends but I'm not sure if they have contacted others in the office. Will know of more at his next bail date. Hoping and praying and trying to stay strong.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by janjoe10 View Post
                    Their is no DNA evidence at all in my sons case but his trial starts a week on tuesday. The system stinks he was rebailed 3 times agter being told it want looking as serious as first thought the cps charged him. This forum really has been a God send to me. Stay strong x
                    Sorry to hear that. As they say the truth is easier than a pack of lies. Hoping for the best for him and your family. How long as his situation gone on for?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Jkj View Post
                      Have to say possibly the worst advice I've had but thanks....
                      I think a little confusion, Casehardened was referring to the block of text. He has 'split it up' for you

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by joe_3178 View Post
                        I think a little confusion, Casehardened was referring to the block of text. He has 'split it up' for you
                        Oh so sorry I didn't even realise that. Wrote it in a hurry and didn't think of breaking it up. Apologies for the misunderstanding

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by joe_3178 View Post
                          I think a little confusion, Casehardened was referring to the block of text. He has 'split it up' for you
                          Yes indeed, and thanks for clarifying this, Joe.

                          My 'now split up' comment was intended for Rights Fighter, which is why I quoted her comment about the text block in my reply.
                          'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Jkj View Post
                            Have to say possibly the worst advice I've had but thanks....

                            That wasn't to you - it was to me. I cannot read large blocks of text due to years of looking into computer monitors. He split your post up so that I can read it.

                            CH would never make that suggestion to you

                            A solicitor who is a family friend may not be the right one in this case. You really do need somebody who specialises in defending false allegations, as opposed to defending sex cases. There's a huge difference. As he's been interviewed though, he won't need one unless he is charged.
                            Last edited by Rights Fighter; 19 May 2016, 09:37 AM.
                            People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                            PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Rights Fighter View Post
                              That wasn't to you - it was to me. I cannot read large blocks of text due to years of looking into computer monitors. He split your post up so that I can read it.

                              CH would never make that suggestion to you

                              A solicitor who is a family friend may not be the right one in this case. You really do need somebody who specialises in defending false allegations, as opposed to defending sex cases. There's a huge difference. As he's been interviewed though, he won't need one unless he is charged.
                              Apologies again. Just haven't been myself lately and with the wedding not far away my mind is all over the place.

                              The solicitor my partner has does specialise in these cases and is one of the best so he wanted to help my partner in any way he could. I hope we ate going down the right path.

                              Well his bail date was tomorrow but it has been moved again not far from the wedding. It has been 5 months so far. I know there isn't a time limit on such situations.

                              Just want this to be over

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