Re Bailed..... devestated

[hello88]

Hi Can't talk long as laptop battery low lol

But 10 minuites before OH due in for bail he got a call to say that they are going to rebail him. I knew i shouldn't of got my hopes up. Solicitor doenst know yet but i can imagine he wont be happy, but not sure there is much he can do.

The ONLY reason is because the department that checks the computer havent checked it yet, the OIC says its not her fault but she will try and chase it up, she says to OH "i know your not guilty but we are having to seem like we're doing a proper investigation" arghhhhh.

Well i'm keeping strong, and he's been rebailed to april but she said it's likely to be cleared up before that. Just so upset and angry that the people who have done this get to enjoy a family christmas. In less than 3 hours time i'm going to have to walk past the person who did this and the only reason i'm not going to let rip and do goodness knows what is because i will remind myself that i'm a better person. (and it wont look good for social services) but its going to be as difficult as the day i found out. He has ruined my sons 1st birthday, summer holidays, and now Christmas. But what can i do????? apart from Cry???? How can i look at my children knowing that news, knowing that the prayer they pray everynite hasnt been answered, daddy will not be coming home for Christmas.

I'm devestated but reminding myself that it could of been worse and there is no new information/allegations/change of story ect and our soliciter doens't know yet so might be able to help....might..... we have the evidence of a vendetta in balck and white yet still they can't drop it!!!!!!

Thanks for all your support, gonna comisirate in chocolate and cups of tea and will probably log on later or tomorrow...
unfourtanatly no bannana's here today (unless our soliciter is a miracle worker, but doubt it)

[AmandaF]

I am so sorry- your disappointment and distress is palpable.

Feel for your kids too- it's horrible, just absolutely horrible

[Lilyput]

Devastated for you this is the worse time of year to be going through it.
I just totally lost it at eldest's Christmas concert they just looked so sweet and innocent the idea of telling them they wouldn't see Daddy anymore left me sobbing in front of everybody, mortified.

Stay strong you have more evidence than any other case if heard and your sol is so confident hold on to the positive, there has been so many NFAs of late.

[AmandaF]

Aaww that's terrible! I don't really celebrate Christmas but even I'm struggling this year.

Everyone else is going on about family. My colleagues all went out on their "do" on friday and I just sat at home and cried. I couldn't afford to go.
What we get reduced to is indescribable

[hello88]

@amanda yeah, i love christmas normally but definatly didn't feel festive, turned the radio of hearing the christmas music, seeing tree's in peoples windows, just not gonna be the same went to tesco's and even the blooming self service check out wished me a merry christmas arghhh

@lily awww, my children came out of school happy today but seeing their face, i really had to hold it together thinking that they're soon going to realise that daddy is not coming home for Christmas. Don't know how i'm gonna survive the Christmas concerts and event especially if the other 'family' go.

But..... survived 6 months so far...... and will just have to make up for it next year!!!

[Megane2015]

I know how you all feel, this is bad enough to deal with at any time but Christmas time is especially hard with everyone all playing happy families. (I know it's sad but I'm so jealous of them). I keep thinking why can't we be together. This will be the first Christmas in 16 years since I met my husband we have not spent Christmas together. I'm just not feeling in the mood, the boys understand as they are older but I haven't even put up my tree and it's usually up on the 1st December without fail. My husband wants me and the boys to enjoy ourselves but it's just not that easy.
I feel for you all as we are all in the same boat and only we can know how it feels, I know friends say they understand but how can they, they go home to their men at night, in work they talk about what they have done and what their husbands have done or said and I just keep quiet as I want to talk about him but I feel they are thinking oh god here she goes again. Sorry I'm ranting again.

Take care everyone and hopefully the new year will bring some more bananas.

Xx

Megane

[Staystrong1]

Keep strong

Hi there

Feel for you and your family. Try and keep strong Sending positive vibes to you and your family, you can get theough this just take one day at a time and enjoy it best you can. This time last year we were in the sme position and are now through it so understand how you feel. Sending positive vibes to you and your familyxx

[Narrow Door]

Hope

Just a note to say that I am thinking of you in this crappy time and I hope for a speedy resolution.

Stay strong.

ND

[hello88]

well spoke to hubby this morning, some calls he sounds positive, others not, but talking about what was discussed with him i'm taking as quite positive, they are literally waiting for another department to 'do their job' and they also mentioned several times that after their investigation they will be passing it on to the department who deals with perverting the course of justice..... so hopefully means that this is a case where justice will be served, and knowing that has given me a real strength boost. I'd rather wait a few more months and know that the people who have done this will be arrested then having hubby home but living in fear of their 'next plan' (there was also mention of them receiving immediate custodial sentence but i defo can't get my hopes up on anything till i truly truly see it)

last night was so so hard though, 4 year old woke up crying for daddy and i just held her and cried, 6 year old (sharing room) woke up (actually doubting she was actually asleep) during this and looked over at me and i didn't say a word but she knew something wasn't right and cried and she said "daddy's not coming home is he?" and i said "he will, but i'm afraid it wont be before christmas" and she just screamed, literally screamed. We cried for about an hour just hugging each other and i managed to settle them down. 6 year old didn't want to go to school today but hopefully its taken her mind of it, was planning on telling them at the weekend but my 6year old isn't stupid.

been working so hard to find that silver lining this morning and having to remain positive for the kids, because they pick up, they clearly pick up!!

Thank you @staystrong hopefully i can be saying the same as you next year!!! and @megane i just want to give you a big hug, people are sympathetic to me but no one who hasn't been through it can understand, its time's like these that i wish that the person with a vendetta should of stabbed me or something instead, at least people can see who the true victim is and he would of been dealt with and i and my family would be protected.

keep strong everyone and thank you for your support, i really honestly don't know where i'd be without this forum

[Aidy]

Heartbreaking stuff to read!
I now realise how lucky i am to still be at home!!!
I pray to god that your situation is sorted very soon, and you can start to get your lives back together!

Just keep strong and keep posting x

[innocentson]

This is really heartbreaking and raw to read
I only glimpsed the additional despair Christmas brings when your in this situation as our trial was end of November and everyone was starting the Xmas prep ; shopping , decorating etc.... But I didn't want to know cos of what was happening.

But must be a thousand times worse for young families with kiddies like yours and others on here.

My heart goes out to you & prayers will include you over Christmas ... Hopefully "karma" will kick in too and repay your false accusers !
And next year will be a brighter one

X

[Shah]

Sending love and hugs your way I wish I could give you a real cuddle my heart as others just breaks for you xxxxx.

Like others we are not celebrating seeing as my son gets sentenced two days before xmas so my hearts torn out and stamped on too .

I can only say take comfort in the fact that the truth will prevail and dont worry about the FA at this time just concentrate on your
kids if you can ( The FA are just so not worth thinking about )..

At least you have the forum so your not alone xx

[Rights Fighter]

Utterly heartbreaking. Tears in my eyes as I type this. Those poor children must be terrified they will never see Daddy again.

Roughly where in the UK are you? Was wondering if any members could meet up with you.

[AmandaF]

So many children are victims of this and where is the support for them?
Homes and families ripped apart and if you DARE to be seen siding with your OH then you are called into question.

I've been through this- still do.
I now have my 12 year old grandson asking me whether it will happen to him, whether he might end up accused of something he didn't do.

There are no words to describe the consequences for our young ones.

As I've said before , meeting others face to face is very valid.

I truly feel your pain and hope it will be over soon

[Shah]

Amanda,
As far as I can tell ( from our experiences ) all they care about is statistics they dont care about who gets damaged on the way to those stats do they!!


I feel mega cross for those of us in these positions!


The Truth will come out it just takes time though!