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  • Something isnt right?!?

    Hello
    I'm wondering if anyone out there can offer some advice to...our nightmare started last year...

    My sister was charged with sexual abuse to a minor last year. This was a family friend who made the accusation who is now in the early 20s....the arrest came as a huge shock to us all...we had drifted away from this friendship due to issues we had seen with the family that we did not agree with.

    This was never something that we discussed with them but they had an idea. We had always remained polite with the family but we had heared through other family friends that they were not happy with us.

    (Im struggling to write too much detail as im so fearful and almost paranoid that this could be seen by them or the that particular elements of the case are so unqiue that this case could be identified).

    Basically my sister has been framed by this family and accused of sexually abusing this individual when they were a child... and we know she didnt do it. We lived in the same house for some of the dates that have been given by the accuser.. she was never hardly left alone let my sister being left long enough with my sister on her own for any of the sexual acts that she has said have been done to her...oh im so sorry im not making much sense here...the whole family are distruaght and we have no where to turn.

    Ideally i need to go into more detail so someome can help us but Im really sturuggling to do this....im unsure with the legal representation that we jave and at times dint feel that we are listened to..sometimes thay we are dismissed even. Not by the solicitor but by the para legal...has anyone the time to discuss this by PM as im so scared this may be seen and go against my sisyer in court of this is seen by the accuser .

    To top ot off im not very technical and new to this forum so not really sure what im doing.
    Last edited by Casehardened; 8 October 2015, 05:30 PM. Reason: Adding paragraph line breaks

  • #2
    Just a quick thought, if you agree, perhaps a moderator could change your wording from 'sister' to 'sibling' if you are concerned about the (slim) chances of being recognised

    Comment


    • #3
      Hopefully Casehardened will come in to separate the paragraphs as I can't read blocks of text.
      People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

      PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by A Bad Dream View Post
        Hello
        I'm wondering if anyone out there can offer some advice to...our nightmare started last year...
        My sister was charged with sexual abuse to a minor last year. This was a family friend who made the accusation who is now in the early 20s....the arrest came as a huge shock to us all...we had drifted away from this friendship due to issues we had seen with the family that we did not agree with. This was never something that we discussed with them but they had an idea. We had always remained polite with the family but we had heared through other family friends that they were not happy with us. (Im struggling to write too much detail as im so fearful and almost paranoid that this could be seen by them or the that particular elements of the case are so unqiue that this case could be identified). Basically my sister has been framed by this family and accused of sexually abusing this individual when they were a child... and we know she didnt do it. We lived in the same house for some of the dates that have been given by the accuser.. she was never hardly left alone let my sister being left long enough with my sister on her own for any of the sexual acts that she has said have been done to her...oh im so sorry im not making much sense here...the whole family are distruaght and we have no where to turn. Ideally i need to go into more detail so someome can help us but Im really sturuggling to do this....im unsure with the legal representation that we jave and at times dint feel that we are listened to..sometimes thay we are dismissed even. Not by the solicitor but by the para legal...has anyone the time to discuss this by PM as im so scared this may be seen and go against my sisyer in court of this is seen by the accuser .
        To top ot off im not very technical and new to this forum so not really sure what im doing.
        Even if the word was changed to 'sibling' theres other factors that would identify this particular case...its taken me all my courage and strength to even wrote this post. Me and my family are lile most on here very worried as her trial will be starting in the next few weeks...to me theres just things that dont add up in this case. We need help as my sister isnt really capable of doing this herself...shes a very vunerable individual and this has been bought to the attention of the solicitors but only after pushing the matter.

        Comment


        • #5
          Are you or any family members witnesses? If not then get your sister to authorise you to liaise with the sol and barrister. It seems you have serious questions you need answers to, and at the very least they should explain things you do not understand.
          People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

          PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

          Comment


          • #6
            Sometimes it's just good to get it off your chest.
            Each case is individual but this is open forum so it's always best to avoid too much detail.
            After a while u can send private messages to other members. Then things are not seen by all.
            But I think this takes about 10 days.
            We are in a similar situation to yours but as yet there's no charge, just an arrest.
            Ours too is a friend who we have had a strained but polite friendship with for many years.
            The things that are being alleged too are shocking and unlikely but nevertheless, the police have a duty to act.
            The only thing I can say is make sure she has the best defence team you can find as you only get one chance at the defence and it's a battle and a half no matter how ridiculous the allegation!
            Do that first, then hold on tight for a bumpy ride!
            Stay strong and hang in there!!!
            Hope this helps
            YoH

            Comment


            • #7
              I am truly sorry you find yourself here- these are difficult times for all in this situation.

              I am no use at legal stuff, but just to say you will find support on here and it's a good place to express your fears and emotions as we all undersand
              They tried to bury us- they didn't know we were seeds

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by A Bad Dream View Post
                has anyone the time to discuss this by PM as im so scared this may be seen and go against my sisyer in court of this is seen by the accuser .
                Originally posted by YearsOfHell View Post
                After a while u can send private messages to other members. Then things are not seen by all.
                But I think this takes about 10 days.
                Hi,

                YoH is quite correct as the system won't allow you to send or receive PM's until you have been a member for 10 days and have made 5 posts.

                I note that you have enabled your email address so of course you could be contacted by other members in this way.
                'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by joe_3178 View Post
                  Just a quick thought, if you agree, perhaps a moderator could change your wording from 'sister' to 'sibling' if you are concerned about the (slim) chances of being recognised
                  Thank you all...yes your all right. This whole situation is a complete nighmare, yes we will all be a witness thetefore limited as to what we can see or know. I have recently found out that my friend of over 26yrs has conspired with the acuser and there family...taking information that I thought i was telling my friend...stright to them.Im devestated. Hence the paranoid state of mind as well.. Its not like you can trust anyone with such personal info on this matter.
                  (Dont get me wrong my sister has nothing to be ashamed off as she hasnt done anything wrong)...if honest ive been left totally bewildered by her actions...when i thi k avout it shw was very cold towrfs me but i brushed that off thinking she may have had a tough day....only now do I realise that it was because she has made judgement that my sister is guilty already 💔
                  im not sure how to email on here but yes if anyone thinks they can lend a ear or support then they are most welcome to email me.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by A Bad Dream View Post
                    . I have recently found out that my friend of over 26yrs has conspired with the acuser and there family...taking information that I thought i was telling my friend...stright to them.Im devestated. Hence the paranoid state of mind as well.. Its not like you can trust anyone with such personal info on this matter.
                    Oh I can relate to that one!! The woman I thought was my friend and confidante while I was going through hell , 5 hours after messaging my OH on facebook, offering him best wishes and support, called me and said I must go to her house immediately, where some sick kind of Victorian melodrama ensued, her telling me that her 15 year old son had been shown a photograph on his laptop.

                    In his statement to the police the boy was very specific about the picture and that it was on his favourites bar. My OH was charged, even tho no such picture was ever discovered by forensics. They didn't show up in court to give evidence.
                    Last edited by Casehardened; 9 October 2015, 09:35 AM. Reason: repairing quote
                    They tried to bury us- they didn't know we were seeds

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Just wanted to say hi and a sorry welcome to the forum.

                      Your story is very similar to ours, so I can relate to what you are saying. We are over a year into our nightmare and every day scares me as to what the future holds.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by AmandaF View Post
                        Oh I can relate to that one!! The woman I thought was my friend and confidante while I was going through hell , 5 hours after messaging my OH on facebook, offering him best wishes and support, called me and said I must go to her house immediately, where some sick kind of Victorian melodrama ensued, her telling me that her 15 year old son had been shown a photograph on his laptop.


                        In his statement to the police the boy was very specific about the picture and that it was on his favourites bar. My OH was charged, even tho no such picture was ever discovered by forensics. They didn't show up in court to give evidence.
                        How evil and cruel can human beings be?!? And what is the motivation...with ours its a mixture if jealousy, revenge and motivation of money. Some people are so low they would stoop to gutter level. Sad

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by WhyUs View Post
                          Just wanted to say hi and a sorry welcome to the forum.

                          Your story is very similar to ours, so I can relate to what you are saying. We are over a year into our nightmare and every day scares me as to what the future holds.
                          Its the same for us, we have to just take it day by day. What is even hader that the British judicial system that is meantbto be protecting us all can allow such cases to arise over no evidence as such...how can this be justice? This also oppresses genuine cases of rape/abuse as well.
                          sorry where are my manners these days...hello and thanks for posting...(thats to all that have offered support so far...this may sound silly even thouvh ive not went into too much detail about our case im gaining confidence already.. ive got a meeting next week with the sol...can anyone think of anygood questions to ask the sol (the trail is in the not to distant future)...
                          Last edited by A Bad Dream; 9 October 2015, 04:12 PM.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by YearsOfHell View Post
                            Sometimes it's just good to get it off your chest.
                            Each case is individual but this is open forum so it's always best to avoid too much detail.
                            After a while u can send private messages to other members. Then things are not seen by all.
                            But I think this takes about 10 days.
                            We are in a similar situation to yours but as yet there's no charge, just an arrest.
                            Ours too is a friend who we have had a strained but polite friendship with for many years.
                            The things that are being alleged too are shocking and unlikely but nevertheless, the police have a duty to act.
                            The only thing I can say is make sure she has the best defence team you can find as you only get one chance at the defence and it's a battle and a half no matter how ridiculous the allegation!
                            Do that first, then hold on tight for a bumpy ride!
                            Stay strong and hang in there!!!
                            Hope this helps
                            YoH
                            YoH, your advice is so true...im not sure if its the best defence team tbh..how do you even find out. This was the duty sol when she was arrested...im so not sure if there anygood tbh..im dealing with everything as my sis cant (as mentioned before she not capable) im feel the pressure now, as at the time i felt that there were good.. now the trial is getting cliser im getting more and more unsure. How much contact should we be having with the sol considering the teial is not so far away.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Rights Fighter View Post
                              Are you or any family members witnesses? If not then get your sister to authorise you to liaise with the sol and barrister. It seems you have serious questions you need answers to, and at the very least they should explain things you do not understand.
                              Yes were all witnesses Rights Fighter.

                              Comment

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