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Falsely sexual assault accusation

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  • Falsely sexual assault accusation

    Hi everyone, im very new to this forum but have been reading and there are some people who have been accused on sexual assault on here similar to me, I need help and guidance, im terrified.

    It happened this past Friday, we had all gone on a work do with some friends to a bar, once the bar closed myself and 5 friends (including my accuser) we went to my accusers house for a few more drinks.
    Over the next hour or 2 everyone left and went home, leaving just me and my accuser, we proceeded to go upstairs together where we started kissing, which eventually led us to having sex. I stayed at her house next to her in bed until 8 the next morning then left.
    She text me that afternoon saying what happened wasn't cool and she had not wanted sex. We are both involved with other people (I feel like the scum of the earth for cheating on mine) , she has now told her boyfriend who has been making threats how I'm going to pay for it.
    I have not yet had any contact from the police but I suspect that is the next step.

    I dont know what to do, I'm shaking as I write this, my world is going to fall apart

    Any help is appreciated

  • #2
    Also I forgot to mention, she admitted to me during our text exchange yesterday that she had taken drugs when we got to hers - I don't know what drug it was or the quantity

    Comment


    • #3
      Sounds like she might be feeling guilty due to having a boyfriend and is either trying to cover herself or has convinced herself she was assaulted. If it's a consent issue (and it sounds like it is), a lot will depend on the exact circumstances around what happened that evening and also what steps you took to ensure consent. As far as I understand it it is very difficult, though not impossible, for a jury to convict someone when it's one person's word against another. I'd recommend that you speak to a solicitor as soon as possible. If you have a friend or acquaintance who is one then great because you'll be able to speak to them today and you won't have to pay, otherwise get on the phone tomorrow morning and make yourself an appointment.
      Most importantly you need to keep your head. Write down clearly everything you remember about the evening going into as much detail as possible (even small details can be important). Make sure you're as clear as possible what time everything happened, when people left, if you were flirting in front of the friends, what was said etc.
      The main thing to remember is that she has not gone to the police and there's a reasonable chance that she might not as it's been a couple of days already. It could be that she knows she's talking s**t or she would have gone to them by now. Don't panic. Speak to a solicitor ASAP.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by StressedNE View Post
        Sounds like she might be feeling guilty due to having a boyfriend and is either trying to cover herself or has convinced herself she was assaulted. If it's a consent issue (and it sounds like it is), a lot will depend on the exact circumstances around what happened that evening and also what steps you took to ensure consent. As far as I understand it it is very difficult, though not impossible, for a jury to convict someone when it's one person's word against another. I'd recommend that you speak to a solicitor as soon as possible. If you have a friend or acquaintance who is one then great because you'll be able to speak to them today and you won't have to pay, otherwise get on the phone tomorrow morning and make yourself an appointment.
        Most importantly you need to keep your head. Write down clearly everything you remember about the evening going into as much detail as possible (even small details can be important). Make sure you're as clear as possible what time everything happened, when people left, if you were flirting in front of the friends, what was said etc.
        The main thing to remember is that she has not gone to the police and there's a reasonable chance that she might not as it's been a couple of days already. It could be that she knows she's talking s**t or she would have gone to them by now. Don't panic. Speak to a solicitor ASAP.
        Thank you for message, I will take everything on board and will make a time line of things as they happened, they are still very fresh in my mind as I have been running through them since she text me.
        She has messaged me in the last 10 mins saying , '' this is serious and we need to meet up and talk. As soon as possible. I am not going to the police but if you had sex with me without me remembering that I want you to realize that it was wrong and you need to apologize''.

        Do I do this? If I apologies I'm admitting a guilt for something I didn't do

        Comment


        • #5
          I wouldn't like to say. I'd probably try to talk to a solicitor first and ask them for advice. I understand that there are some solicitors who work virtually all the time so you might be able to find someone local that can speak to you today, or at least advise you over the phone.

          Comment


          • #6
            Do a Google search for 'out of hours legal advice'. That should bring something up. Good luck.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Goffal View Post
              She has messaged me in the last 10 mins saying , '' this is serious and we need to meet up and talk. As soon as possible. I am not going to the police but if you had sex with me without me remembering that I want you to realize that it was wrong and you need to apologize''.

              Do I do this? If I apologies I'm admitting a guilt for something I didn't do
              She may be wanting to settle things but equally she may want to record your responses!
              'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'

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              • #8
                Originally posted by StressedNE View Post
                Do a Google search for 'out of hours legal advice'. That should bring something up. Good luck.
                Thanks for all your help, I have a few numbers that I will be calling today. Thanks again

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Casehardened View Post
                  She may be wanting to settle things but equally she may want to record your responses!
                  My thoughts exactly, its making it difficult on whether to meet or not. I just wanted it resolved

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