falsely accused of attempted rape :-(

[stockport64]

Hi, im new to this site. ive joined as i am openly gay man looking for a relationship and i have used a few online dating websites. i met a guy a few months and had a really nice first date. on the 2nd date i went to his flat where he cooked and we watched tv and chatted. about 5 hours into the date he came very strange and accused me of taking cocaine (which i do not do and have never done) and he had sent me a msg to my mobile phone, while i was in the bathroom, telling me to get out of his flat! i left immediately and that was that. i have now been contacted by the police and arrested for attempted rape!!! i never even touched the guy. im now on bail and i have been suspended from work as i am a qualified nurse and i work with vulnerable adults. work however have been very supportive and im on full pay. but this drama is never ending. my phone has been confiscated and im now on medication off the doctor to help calm my nerves. i have also had a recent call from the police saying they have more lines of enquiries to follow up and they want to reinterview when i attend for bail, and they also want to ask my boss at work a couple of questions! my life is being ruined by this.

[edinashed]

Hi, im new to this site. ive joined as i am openly gay man looking for a relationship and i have used a few online dating websites. i met a guy a few months and had a really nice first date. on the 2nd date i went to his flat where he cooked and we watched tv and chatted. about 5 hours into the date he came very strange and accused me of taking cocaine (which i do not do and have never done) and he had sent me a msg to my mobile phone, while i was in the bathroom, telling me to get out of his flat! i left immediately and that was that. i have now been contacted by the police and arrested for attempted rape!!! i never even touched the guy. im now on bail and i have been suspended from work as i am a qualified nurse and i work with vulnerable adults. work however have been very supportive and im on full pay. but this drama is never ending. my phone has been confiscated and im now on medication off the doctor to help calm my nerves. i have also had a recent call from the police saying they have more lines of enquiries to follow up and they want to reinterview when i attend for bail, and they also want to ask my boss at work a couple of questions! my life is being ruined by this.

Get a solicitor before you return to the police station. It doesn't cost anything if you can find a legal aid solicitor

[Rights Fighter]

Legal aid is available for interviews not for any other purpose, at this stage.

How soon after the alleged assault was it that he contacted the police? If immediately he would or should have had a medical examination and swabs taken.

[stockport64]

he made the accusation that same night but as it was supposedly attempted rape, (which didnt actually happen), there is no evidence, hence he wasnt taken to st marys. so why on earth are the police dragging this out and "pursuing further lines of enquiries". and why do they want to talk to my boss at work?

[Rights Fighter]

Attempted rape involves "preparation to rape" which could in effect produce semen and therefore DNA.

I can't answer your question in relation to their investigations. Possibly the complainant reported the alleged assault to other people so they would (or should) be interviewed by the police.

They will want to talk to your boss as you work with vulnerable people. All you can do is to wait it out.

[edinashed]

Attempted rape involves "preparation to rape" which could in effect produce semen and therefore DNA.

I can't answer your question in relation to their investigations. Possibly the complainant reported the alleged assault to other people so they would (or should) be interviewed by the police.

They will want to talk to your boss as you work with vulnerable people. All you can do is to wait it out.

Slightly off topic I apologise, but what is "preparation to rape"?

[Rights Fighter]

Commits or is alleged to have committed a sexual act that stops short of rape, oral or anal as in this case.

[joe_3178]

Sorry to hear this it must be a very difficult time. From the way you explain it there seems to be virtually nothing to back up his wild claim. Try to keep strong and remember that the Police/cps will hopefully drop this in time. Nonetheless you may have a long wait and will need support of friends and maybe GP ex at this difficult time

[stockport64]

thanks for the support everyone. there was no physical contact between me and this person so why r they dragging this out and making my life hell. there is no evidence whatsoever. and supposedly he smacked me in the face to get me off him!!!! well surely they would have come round that night and took a photograph of my face or wounds which he supposedly inflicted on me. and the cocaine use. they declined to give me a drugs test!! whats all that about!!

[Rights Fighter]

You don't know what he's concocted possibly with the help of a couple of friends. For instance, as I said before, he could have "told" a friend what "happened". That witness would give evidence as "recent complaint".

He might also have "told" his parents or family members.

He might have deliberately set up your meeting so he could make a few thousand quid courtesy of the taxpayer in the form of "compensation".

At this point you don't know. We don't know. Nobody knows what he's done, who he "told" etc. apart from the police who won't tell you everything.

I appreciate this is really frustrating.