Accused of Historic Sexual Abuse (circa 12 years)

[Absolute_Innocent]

Hi All,

Firstly I cannot believe that I am having to write this let alone disclose, but I really don't know where else to go. I'm a 26 year old gay guy from the UK, partnered for 8 years. Here are the details of the alleged incident, I will try to keep things as specific and brief as possible.

I am alleged to have sexually abused a boy 12 years ago (sometime in 2003). D:14 vs C:7. This was supposed to have happened in a Caravan and when we were sharing a bed. I am accused of putting my hand down his pajamas twice and masterbating him. He then got out of the shared bed and into bed with his parent/s.

Last week CID turn up at my mums house looking for me to ask a few questions (I had moved out about 7 years ago). They want me to go back to the family village for voluntary questioning (of course I have read what this means and straight away sought the help of a solicitor). As yet, I haven't gone back as my solicitor isn't free, but the police seem fine with this.

I know that I didn't do it. We have never shared a bed and my whole family have confirmed what the sleeping arrangements always were (and it never involved me sharing a double bed with anyone). I feel sick, haven't eaten and really don't know why this is all coming out now. The boy (now 19) is a down and out. He's been on numerous drugs (M-KAT, Cocaine, etc.) over the last few years. He drinks excessively to the point that hes been held in custody for being drunk and disorderly. He has recently been accused of beating up one of his younger brothers, he's also been accused of using a deodorant can and a lighter and setting someone alight. To say that he has a chequred past is an understatement.

What are the next steps that I should be doing? Being just 14 at the time (and this being 12 years ago) I am really fuzzy on dates and events I have asked my parents for help too (they have been super supportive and understand this is all just b***sh**).

Thanks for listening/reading and good luck to all of you going through similar. Moderators, feel free to edit if you think I have gone into too much detail.

[Casehardened]

Hi and welcome to the forum,

Hopefully once the CID interview you and can tick this box that will be the end of the matter; after all the complainant doesn't sound like a particularly reliable witness who will stand up well to cross-examination!

Nevertheless it will be necessary to respond to the questioning in a coherent manner and you do have the advantage of prior knowledge of the interview and what the questioning will be about (though I do wonder how you know what the details of the accusation are when you have not yet actually been questioned)

As you say, it is going to be difficult to remember all the details from the past, all you can do is write a timeline of the events of that holiday (assuming that you were taken on holiday by his parents and not your own) and fill in any gaps as and when they come to mind. Obviously in this matter the statements taken from his parents will be critical. (again assuming that yours weren't present on the holiday)

[Absolute_Innocent]

Hi Casehardened,

The C originally raised this around last Christmas (2014) to his mother. The C's mum then went to visit my mum and told her the details of the accusation (no date had been confirmed by the C at this point, and details of the alleged incident were "touching"). Our mums were friends. Understandably they are not anymore however, the C's mum still wants to be friends with my mum. Which stills baffles me. Since this date, from what my mum knows the C has been put under pressure by his parents to report to the police which happened towards the end of last month. My solicitor has also been in touch with the DCI and I assume asked for a disclosure (which then let me know about the dates and also more about the accusation).

It wasn't really a holiday as such as we owned the caravan. They popped down for a week, which they did for a number of times during our mum's friendship. In total there were 7 of us (C, siblings and mum) and me (siblings and mum). They later bought a caravan just a few doors away from us for about 2/3 years after the alleged incident.

I've never been involved with the police before, my integrity has never been questioned or in doubt. I'm sure that money is a motivating factor in all of this for him, but I just don't understand why me. I understand that my solicitor needs to paint a picture of that 2003 trip, but how best can I help him do this?

Thanks

[Rights Fighter]

Sounds rather like "abuse excuse" to "explain" his bad behaviour through the years. However, it is also true to say that many people with substance and behavioural problems are like that, due to being abused as children. At this point it's an "either or" situation.

It could be that he's recently heard you are gay, remembers something that did happen elsewhere (which may be true) but can't remember the details, so he's made them up from vague memories, using you as the assailant simply because you are gay.

As you've not been charged, it's unlikely there is much, if any disclosure. At the moment you cannot paint the picture of what happened when he stayed in the caravan, because you don't know all of the details.

You might also (just) fall under the "Doli Incapax" doctrine given you were supposed to have been 14 years of age when the alleged incident is supposed to have occurred.

Whereabouts in the UK are you (roughly - don't name a town) and also whereabouts in the UK was this supposed to have occurred (roughly)?

[Absolute_Innocent]

I'm now based in the South East England and this was all alleged to happen in Wales.

I just feel like a sitting duck until my solicitor is able to confirm a date for me to attend voluntary questioning. I'm paranoid that unfabricated rumors are circulating and there is nothing I can do. I'm watching the door constantly and I just hate not feeling in control of a situation. I have my whole life ahead of me with my partner and now I feel that I cannot move on until this is over.

Is there nothing I can do in the meantime or any preparation that I can do prior to the voluntary questioning?

[Rights Fighter]

Do you know if you have to attend Wales PS or where you are, for this "voluntary interview?"

You can family members if they still keep dairies or calendars from the times you spent in the caravan. Build a picture of times spent in the caravan from the memories of family members and/or anybody else who might have been present.

It's not unusual to sit and think that everybody knows about the allegations even if they do not. You won't have been named in the media and the complainant and his family are maybe in a different part of the UK than you.

Start a journal, note down everything you can remember from times at the caravan. Maybe family members have photos of those holidays too......

[Absolute_Innocent]

My solicitor wanted the "voluntary interview" to happen in this part of the country, but unfortunately I will need to go back to Wales.

Thank you for the advise below, I will start to focus on this now.

[Absolute_Innocent]

One other thing Rights Fighter - I've read a lot about "Doli Incapax" on this forum? Is it not only a defense for those that are guilty? Also, this case would be post 1998 so it would not apply? Thanks for all the help so far.

[Rights Fighter]

It's not necessarily a defence for somebody who has actually committed the offences and in fact, it's frequently used at trials. Trials only happen when the alleged offence is denied or the circumstances of the defence is in question: for instance self -defence in an alleged murder case.

I know of cases where a young man (early 20's for instance) has been accused of something 10 years or so previously. He's denied the allegations or simply cannot remember the incident or can remember something but not sure what. Many of us remember "doctors and nurses" and "mummies and daddies" from years back.

Some misunderstandings can happen, for instance, when person who has addled their brain with alcohol or drugs for instance, might make an allegation they either know to be false, but they quite like the idea of "compensation" or they genuinely assume they've been abused, having had counselling for the drug/drink problems and hadn't 'remembered' it, until it has been put to them by a counsellor.

False memories are often planted in vulnerable people's minds when being counselled by people who are damaged themselves, and who go into psychology initially to help themselves.

I am currently reading this on Kindle

http://www.justiceforcarol.com/

Horrifying on its own, but even more horrifying is that this sort of "counselling" is still going on and ruining lives.

[Casehardened]

One of our members researched Doli Incapax extensively; note though that the alleged offence needs to have occurred prior to 1998 when the legislation was amended.

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...0-Doli-Incapax

[Rights Fighter]

I've heard of Doli Incapax being considered in cases where the alleged assaults took place after 1998.

I think it probably depends on the merits and circumstance of each individual case.

At the moment though, he's not been interviewed so he doesn't know what he is facing.

[Absolute_Innocent]

Thanks RF and Casehardened - As this incident was alleged to have happened in 2003, then I don't think "Doli Incapax" will apply as it is post 1998 and not pre.

Already trying to make a timeline, add in key events and things I can remember. Being busy keeps my mind active and I feel more settled.

I think I need to push my solicitor for us to attend the "voluntary interview" a little sooner; only then will I know the full story. I spoke to a second solicitor for some advice and I mentioned what had been said to current solicitor by the police and he was shocked that so much had been disclosed before any sort of meeting. I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing.

[Rights Fighter]

Instruct a solicitor in the locality of the police station otherwise you may not get LA for one local to you who would have to travel and potentially involve an overnight stay, unless you are paying him/her of course.

[jittery]

hi RF

Instruct a solicitor in the locality of the police station otherwise you may not get LA for one local to you who would have to travel and potentially involve an overnight stay, unless you are paying him/her of course.

Yes, it is a fact that (and it is I believe a dangerous thing to do) some people do study psychology initially believing they will sort themselves out. I lived by such a campus and the number of people on the course for this very reason was astounding! Of course they all want to help themselves and others, their intentions are genuine.

False memory syndrome seemed to be a repeating theme and abuse seemed an excuse to justify people's actions and circumstances in some instances. There are cases where abuse is genuine of course, but if drugs are involved and the user suddenly "remembers" abuse I for one find that a bit suspicious.

The more so because there are people who have gone through abuse and are not drug addicts.

[Absolute_Innocent]

Hi All,

Thought I would do a quick update. My solicitor wants to wait until we are fully prepared to go back for the voluntary questioning. It's almost been 2 weeks since the police were at my mums door, is it normal that their would wait this long? My solicitor hasn't told me of any further conversations between him and the CID. What I'm worried about is that the police will see this as a delay tactic or that I am buying more time to make up "lies" before being interviewed; which really isn't the case.

I've been able to give my solicitor some timelines of events, motives for my accuser, photos of where the illegded incident took place and a counter version of events based on what he's been told by the police so far. I've asked for photos, but there are none. Is there anything this I should be looking at giving my solicitor?!

So as such, no real update. Nothing seems to be moving and I'm still living in limbo. I'm trying to keep busy but it's hard not to think about this for a lot of the time.

Thanks for reading/listening.