Advice for my friend

[me15]

Hi I have posted on here before but it was a while ago so hope it's ok to ask for advice again! My friend broke up with his ex around 2 years ago now and the day after they split up his ex called the police saying their son and her son from a previous relaitonship had been abused by my friend. My friend volunteered himself to speak to the police and they found no concerns. However the ex made a complaint about lack of police action and as a consquence social services became involved and police interviewed the children who found evidence of them being coached and no evidence of any abuse whatsoever. My friend was granted full visitation rights and overnight stays and CPS closed the case. After a few weeks however my friend turned up to pick the kids up and his ex told him he wasn't seeing them children and he would have to take her back to court again. She has also since gone back to the police carrying on accusations about him which the police themselves say they are aware are false but they have to be seen to look into them. My friend has gone into a deep depression and is now having treatment for drug addiction and stress and depression as a direct result of what she accused him of. He cannot afford legal fees and is considering representing himself. PLease please help us, we don't know what to do next

[Casehardened]

Hi and welcome to the forum,

Firstly, well done for supporting your friend through this, this will be so helpful for him.

To help members offer the correct advice can you tell us if he has been bailed by the police for further enquiries into the latest allegations or actually been charged with them.

NB if the allegations relate to sexual offences he will not be permitted to represent himself in court, however if he has no substantial assets a solicitor will be able to apply for legal aid on his behalf. (though if he has an good income he may be required to make a contribution towards costs which will be refunded after an aquittal)

[jittery]

Hiya

Hi and welcome to the forum,

Firstly, well done for supporting your friend through this, this will be so helpful for him.

To help members offer the correct advice can you tell us if he has been bailed by the police for further enquiries into the latest allegations or actually been charged with them.

NB if the allegations relate to sexual offences he will not be permitted to represent himself in court, however if he has no substantial assets a solicitor will be able to apply for legal aid on his behalf. (though if he has an good income he may be required to make a contribution towards costs which will be refunded after an aquittal)

I agree, your support will make a world of difference! I'm hoping this may help. A friend of mine went through all of this. I'm not condoning his ex's actions, he did start things, but they ended up going through a tit for tat battle each hoping the other would be denied access to the kids.
He ended up in roughly the same boat as your friend- supervised hourly visits each fortnight and facing all sorts of accusations (so many I've lost count). In the end it was all cleared up, and he is back to full access to his children and things seem to have calmed down now. I'd like to think things go the same way for your friend, mine was certainly very angry and ranting or down and crying depending on the day. It must be a horrible position to be in, I wish I had some answers for you. All I can do is wish you both all the very best and for a positive outcome where everything is as it should be.
Stay strong!

[me15]

Thank you!

Thank you for your help and support with this, it's so hard to know what to do for the best. My friend has not been bailed or charged or anything like that, he took himself to the police when he heard what he'd been accused of and volunteered himself to be interviewed and the police said they'd be in touch if they needed to speak to him again. After that his ex made a complaint to her local MP saying the police had not done their job properly and so they had to call him in again and this time social services and CAFCASS were involved. My friend was still allowed su0pervised contact at this point and after the children were interviewd and no evidence was found he was allowed overnight stays and the CPS closed the case completely. He was then meant to see the children every week as planned but after a couple of weeks he turned up to pick them up and his ex simply told him he was not seeing them and he would have to take her back to court. She keeps going to the police making up further accusations against him and even the police said they were bored of her. The interviews with the children showed they had been coached into saying things.

He doesn't have any assets at all and most of his earnings are now swallowed up by Child Maintainence costs even though he hasn;t been allowed to see his children. HOw would we be able to stop her making up allegations? She has spread rumours about him via their mutual friends and posted things about him online. I really appreciate all your help guys, thank you

[Rights Fighter]

Hi and so sorry to read the background story

Your friend (and you as you are so ably supporting him) may find these links useful

http://www.fassit.co.uk/

And

http://www.fassit.co.uk/fassit_forum_registration.htm

These people are fab with helping folk who have problems with SS

If you have seen information published by the accuser/cohorts then hopefully you have taken screenshots as evidence.

This may well be a case where the CPS could be asked to proceed with a case against the mother for perverting the course of justice. Has your friend written to the local CPS to ask about this?

[jittery]

Hiya

Thank you for your help and support with this, it's so hard to know what to do for the best. My friend has not been bailed or charged or anything like that, he took himself to the police when he heard what he'd been accused of and volunteered himself to be interviewed and the police said they'd be in touch if they needed to speak to him again. After that his ex made a complaint to her local MP saying the police had not done their job properly and so they had to call him in again and this time social services and CAFCASS were involved. My friend was still allowed su0pervised contact at this point and after the children were interviewd and no evidence was found he was allowed overnight stays and the CPS closed the case completely. He was then meant to see the children every week as planned but after a couple of weeks he turned up to pick them up and his ex simply told him he was not seeing them and he would have to take her back to court. She keeps going to the police making up further accusations against him and even the police said they were bored of her. The interviews with the children showed they had been coached into saying things.

He doesn't have any assets at all and most of his earnings are now swallowed up by Child Maintainence costs even though he hasn;t been allowed to see his children. HOw would we be able to stop her making up allegations? She has spread rumours about him via their mutual friends and posted things about him online. I really appreciate all your help guys, thank you

No problem, I watched this destroy my friends life to a large extent. I got angry with my friend and his wife, I told them there will be genuine cases out there and all they were doing was tying up the police AND social services and wasting their time. I do remember his ex did the same. He'd turn up and she would just say that he was not going to see them again. I'm sorry to have to tell you that he did have to go back to court one last time; and I think he got a court order allowing him access. Things have settled down now, because they've both realised (eventually) that neither of them will get what they want so they've just decided to plod on with the arrangement they had in the first place.
I hope things work out for your friend. Keep asking for advice on this forum. I can only offer support, but people do pass through here who can offer you more constructive help from the experiences they've been through and how their situations were resolved.
All the best and stay strong!
j

[me15]

Thank you

Just a quick thank you for all your advice and help, we have been to see a solicitor for some free advice and we have been told to get the upto date Police reports of the last false allegation the ex had made. We have been told we will need to get a court order to retrieve these files, how can we go about doing thie? Also we have been told to fill in a C79 form to get a court order to gain access to his children but it looks a bit daunting and I don't know where to start with it or where it has to go back to once complete. Any advice is very gratefully received, you guys are awesome thank you

[jittery]

hi again

Just a quick thank you for all your advice and help, we have been to see a solicitor for some free advice and we have been told to get the upto date Police reports of the last false allegation the ex had made. We have been told we will need to get a court order to retrieve these files, how can we go about doing thie? Also we have been told to fill in a C79 form to get a court order to gain access to his children but it looks a bit daunting and I don't know where to start with it or where it has to go back to once complete. Any advice is very gratefully received, you guys are awesome thank you

Can't help at the mo, but I'll see if I can talk to my friend who's been through similar and see if he can offer any advice.
Stay strong!

[me15]

court order

thanks guys for your help, been to the Personal Support Unit today and the man filled in the C79 form and sent it for us at a cost of £100. This will eventually provide us with a court date where we can get a court order from the Police to obtain all the reports of false allegations the ex made regarding him 'pimping his 4 year old son' out to his friends and we will be able to complain about her wasting Police time and tax payer's money with her stupid and pathetic false allegations. She was also given legal aid in order to make her disgusting complaints and we will argue against this. My friend has been to hell and back in the last year and is currently signed off sick from work but he's fighting back and we will carry on until justice is made. Thank you for your help

[jittery]

hi

thanks guys for your help, been to the Personal Support Unit today and the man filled in the C79 form and sent it for us at a cost of £100. This will eventually provide us with a court date where we can get a court order from the Police to obtain all the reports of false allegations the ex made regarding him 'pimping his 4 year old son' out to his friends and we will be able to complain about her wasting Police time and tax payer's money with her stupid and pathetic false allegations. She was also given legal aid in order to make her disgusting complaints and we will argue against this. My friend has been to hell and back in the last year and is currently signed off sick from work but he's fighting back and we will carry on until justice is made. Thank you for your help

Good luck! Hope it all goes the way it should!