My story my hell

[markanthony]

brilliant i thought to myself given a job a chance to get myself together and stop being a bum
my brother in law who had given me the same job he had given me twice before through leaving unannounced
in the middle of the night for no reason time to get myself back on track job was fine i was doing well
i was staying at my sisters emmas untill i could find my own place then the messaged popped up on facebook
(HI) from my ex cara who i had a son with caelan my boy who is now 3 we talked for a good few weeks untill
i mentioned to her that i think that we should get a place together make it a family again give it a good try work things out
she agreed so i found a house not far from my sisters in a nice village we moved in was a great start we had to start from scratch because
i was working and cara dident she was a full time mum and the fact she was deaf it was hard for her to keep things together
in the house with caelan so she had some things installed a pager for the doorbell and for caelan as he slept
if the bell went or caelan moved in the night the pager would wake her through a vibration. anyway we moved into the house it was going great
things couldent get any better i was planning my driving test cara had a friends who came over who lived not far from were we had moved to
she loved the fact she had moved so close to her friends who she couldent see much and she was now happy she got to see them all the time
well things went on and i did the dirty i girl i was seeing before i got back with cara was messaging me we had been talking alot and i went to see
her a good few times yes i cheated on cara worst thing i could ever do she found out and went nuts but who could blame her i cheated on her lost all trust
in her shamed myself i felt bad and so i should time went on and she forgave me out of love and for caelans sake
him to grow up with loving parents was the best thing things fineally were back to normal we was happy again i knew i wasent going to mess it up again this tme
i had my chance lets say. caelan my son started a tantrum period were when he was told off or dident get what he want he would headbutt the floor this concerned me
and told cara i dident like it she told me it was normal i dident belive her on this it was bad the way he would constantly headbut the floor ive never seen anything
like it in a child so i turned to my sister and she said he might have ADHD so i asked cara about it and she went nuts shouting at me swearing (HE HASENT GOT THAT) so she
asked the health visitor anyway and she said it was normal allthough she hadent seen it it was allways on my mind everytime he was told off even at his christaning he did
it infront of everyone bit embarressing but i was told it was normal so i accepted it. a few weeks later and i had a meet at my house with aload of lads i spoke
to online on the ps3 great lads spoke to them for over 10 years so we decided to have a get together cara dident mind she went away for the weekend to stay at her
friends in lowestoft i was happy she was happy the weekend was great best ever cara came back home on the monday i was happy to see her and caelan i cleaned the house top to
bottom to make sure she was happy with it things were great. me and cara decided to have another baby i said i really want a little girl so caelan would have a sister
she agreed and stopped the pill several weeks went by and she told me the news she was pregnant great i said this is going to be fantastic things couldent get any better.
i came home from work one day and cara said to me that she was going to greece with her friend i said ok thats abit weird but fine i dont mind having caelan but the thing was she told me
she was going in 2 days i said WHAT you cant i need to book time of work i need to sort things out with my work i could get fired but she went on one with me so in the end i said ok go i dont mind
i rang my boss told him the situation he said it was fine lucky enough whilst cara was away i had a incedent with caelan i was walking to the shop with him and on our way back he decided to throw a tantrump
and drop to his knees and turn witch i felt a click on his wrist scared the life out of me he was screaming so i rushed into the house with him look him over and he seemed ok he stopped crying
i thought nothing of it but then straight away i noticed he was playing with his toy and his right arm was dead he wasent useing it atall so i paniced my mate rushed us to the hospital got there to see a doctor
he told me his wrist was just dislocated but he popped back in as i took him out the car baby seat witch is normal he said it happens all the time i was glad but felt guilt when i looked at caelan thinking it was my fault
i told cara about it told her he was ok everything is fine hes happy. cara came back from greece and im not sure but she had changed i dont know what was wrong with her she was differant i wasent happy with the fact she had just dumped
caelan on me for a week whilst she went to greece but i was happy to spend more time with him through working all the time a few days past and we had a argument i asked her what was wrong with her and she went nuts at me she was so angry i couldent
belive myself standing there.taking all this abuse so i said to her what ever and sat and played on the ps3 whilst she was upstairs with caelan i dident want to get in her way so i left her alone took her up a cup of tea and went back down stairs
anyway the next day i was at work and got a message from my freind Piet hes oe of the lads from the meet i had earlyer in the year we all called him Taxi his nickname so to speak he told me that him and cara had been messaging each other i told him i dident
belive him so he sent me the entire facebook conversation i read though it and they were she had even asked him to meet her in greece i couldent belive it what is she doing why is she doing this anyway i printed it off and i took it home went in the front door
and she was ironing i said to her look at this cara cara is (deaf) so i was in the process of learning sign language i showed her and she knew straight away what it was and automatically she went mental
she told me to get out the house and i refused i told her i wasent going anywere i rang my sister who on;y lived up the road told her what was going on 10 minuites went by and the police turned up at the house weve had a call of domestic disturbance
i invited them in told them what was going on my sister turned up and took caelan to her house she dident want him to see what was going on i thanked her so i had a chat with the officer 1 mae who was talking to me and 1 female who was talking to cara in the kitchen
tthe make officer talking to me then went into my living room and spoke to the female officer they said right you have to go or she has to go i said no we will work this out its only a small argument cara decided to go to her brothers in london i wasent happy for her to take
caelan from me i told the officer she can go she aint taking my son but n the end she went they gave her a lift to the train station and she was gone for around 3-4 weeks we spoke online and fineally she came back home i said sorry for shouting at her
she said sorry for shouting at me everything was fine. a few weeks went by and we had another arguement i would go and see my neice all the time everyday to be honest
i loved them to bits and have been there since all 3 of them were babies i love them very much and would do anything for them cara said to me that i spent to much time with them and i wasent to see them for a while this dident
go down well with me or when i told my sister about it. things were heating up again and its what i dident want cara would put caelan infront of the tv all day whilst i was at work everyday he would be infront of the tv i would come home
he would be in his high chair infront of the tv soem times i would come home pick him up out the high chair and he would be so wet he was allmost dripping i hated it and told her about it she went mad at me this and with me not being aloud to see my neices i told her that was enough
i told her i wasent going to stop seeing the girls and i wanted caelan to stop beng put in the high chair she dident like that we had a big arguement she threw a chair at witch hit me but i wasent fussed over a chair anyway that night i slept downstairs cara was upstairs in bed it was about
3:00am in the morning and there was a knock at the door i woke up straight away and peeped through the curtain and there was 3 guys at the door i went to the door and spoke through the door and asked who it was i wasent opening my door at that time for the safety of my son and cara it could have been
anyone he then said its caras brother open the door i said im not opening my door go away he then kicked the door and said get out here i immediatly got on the phone to the police
they arrived about 5 mins after that i woke cara up in the process asked her why they were here she looked at me with a grin on her face and told me that her brother will allways look out for her (IS THAT A THREAT) i said to her you intentionally brought your brother up here to give me a beating
i went nuts. the police came in the house there was 3 officers in total he asked me what it was about i told them caras brother said he drove all the way from london all the way up to the midlands to see how his sister was at 3 in the morning not a very likely story why would she do this to me i had no idea
i told my sister about it the next day she couldent belive it . her brother was n longer allowed at the house and i was in a way really angry with what she had tryed. 2 days went by and she told me she was going to l********* to see her daughter jade who dident live with us over somthing that had happened with her family
its irrelivent to this story. cara would go to l********* and see her daughter she would go for 2 somtimes even 3 weeks at a time i started to get annoyed with it we was no longer a family she would be home for a week some times maybe even less i thought somthing was going on . dident dare to ask her because i dident want another
episode with her. but i fineally had enough i told her to bring caelan home last time she had gone i told her i miss him and wanted to see him she told me she was coming back home and that she gave up the house to the lanlord so now i was paying full rent and was struggling so i had a couple of friends move in to help with things
i told cara that i wasent going to let her take caelan away from me i told her i would go for full custody of caelan. the next thing i found out is that she was in a womens centre for people who had been in violent and aggressive relationships i couldent understand why she was in a place like that when she had a loving home a nice home
that we both had worked towards she told me when i spoke to her on facebook that she was there because she had nowere else to go i said why are you in a place like that its for people who have been in violent and aggressive relationships she said you shouted at me and slamme dyour fist on the desk i said yes cara out of anger. this is refereing
to the arguement we had about caelan being locked in his high chair allday everyday and i had enough of it so whilst she was on holiday in greece i took a hammer to it and posted it on facebook and explained why i did it witch allmost everyone agreed. but yes this is a violent relationship according to cara i told her that she had lied i had never hit cara
never even raised my hand to her ever im not that type of person. cara then eventually agreed to let me come over and see caelan and meet her in town and that i could have caelan for the weekend i was over the moon by this my friends reece and steph drove me over there i was really greatfull to them for it i got there went into the BHS cafe i saw cara
and her daughter jade and my little man caelan i was so happy to see him we had coffee and some food and her daughter left with her grandma. we had another coffee and i said to cara ok its time i got going i have a long drive back home and caelan will be tired by the time i got home she said ok kissed him goodbye as i was walking out to get in the car she caem running out the shop and grabbed the pushchair
i said whats wrong she told me i wasent taking him i told her we agreed on it he was staying with me for the weekend she changed her mind and started to cause a scene so i left it there i was angry upset i really dident know what to do so i left i was so angry i told my sister she couldent belive it i have no idea what cara was playing at
but i got to see my son i got back home i sent her a message i told her that i wasent standing for it im taking her to court for full custody of caelan she told me i would never see him again. wich infuriated me i was upset angry dident know what to think i spoke to a solicitor the next day he told me what to do
i got forms to fill in and take to the courts i dident have the right paper work so i had to redo it all a week had past and i got a letter through the door cara was having an injunction order put on me i wasent having this atall. i went to the court in n****** were i was going to call her a liar to her face what happened next amazed me. her solicitor came out and called me in for a chat
i said ok went into the room with her she said ok so cara is having the injunction put on you for violence and agression towards her i told her it was all lies nothing of the sort as ever happened she looked down on me like a peice of **** she allso mentioned that i had randomly turned up in n****** to see cara at bhs were she was having dinner with her mum nd her daughter and caelan. i put a stop
to that lie there and then and showed her solicitor text messages i had printed out between me and cara cara texting me telling me were to meet her and even were to park witch her solicitor looked at amazed she knew that she was lieing but obvously she couldent say that i got called into the court and tomy surprise cara wasent there i asked the judge were cara was and her solicitor said to the judge that she is very
scared and fightened of me i said is this some sort of joke anyway the injunction order was for a year i dident want to argue with the judge i told him there had never been any such violence or agression in any part of the relationship. and that she had lied i accepted the injunction order anyway witch was placed to me on 28th march 2013.

but i still wanted caelan in my life so i dident stop there i spoke to my solicitor and i spoke to social services several times about the problems i was having they

[markanthony]

wasent much help to me and then i started to get ignored i gave up i shouldent have but i did i wanted to send her an email so bad but i knew i couldent so i got on with my life i met a lovely women called emma she was great
we had a good relationship i passed my driving test with her help things were starting to go good again then out of the blue she got a message on facebook from someone explaining to them everything that happened to cara witch was funny because the way it was type is exactly the way cara wrote i knew it was her but we just ignored it. i thought it was over i was wrong
i was asleep at home it was about 4:00am in the morning and there was a very loud knock on the door i was at home and had a friend staying i went to the front bedroom window and it was the police i said yes he said can you open the door please yes one moment i threw some clothes on and opened the door and there was stood 3 police officers come in i said they came in and the officer faceing me said are you mark ******* i said yes i am
he said im sorry but your under arrest for suspicion of rape and he read me my rights my heart stopped i couldent belive it i said im sorry there must be a mistake he said there isent he took his hancuffs out and i refused to have them put on i said ill go with you im not having cuffs put on ive done nothing wrong as i walked out my door another 2 officers came from my back garden i couldent belive it i was put in the car and took to the police station
i was arrested for the rape of cara ******* i could not belive she had gone this far she knew i was coming for caelan and she was doing everything she could to stop me i just dident think she would go this far the officer in the interview room officer ford questioned me about it i told him everything is a lie nothing ever happened like what she had mentioned he went into great detail over what she had said
witch upset me even more i couldent belive it still sat there in that chair being questioned over a crime that is the worst of the worst he said that she is claiming that i raped her 4 times over a 5 month period i think thats right not sure but i told him it was all lies and it was a plan of hers to stop me having my son i explained everythng that had gone on. i told them i had everything printed out at home in a file that i had kept everything tht proved she was a liar
they said they would bail me if they got that file so i was bailed and release they drove me home and i gave them the file. i was distraught not thinking. dident know were to turn to or what to think. alot of people found out about it and i was branded somthing i wasent a rapist i fell behind on my job that i had been in for 8 years i left moved to another job people there found out what had happened i had phone calls calling me a rapist threats so i left moved back up north
not working have nothing on bail for somting im not. so i decided to move down south new start i have a job im staying with a friend and im slowly starting to get my life back on track i ring my solictior more times than i should asking him if there has been any news seems i havent been charged yet im on bail my solicitor JBR MORGAN GROUP are very good in what they do im constantly kept upto date with everything but still evryday i worry what if i am charged what if they do belive her
lieing mouth i hope she understands whats shes done is wrong and that asoon as this is over i will be going for full custody of my son and that she belongs in prison for putting me through all this.

[Casehardened]

Hi Mark,

Sorry to read of your experiences; if you read through other member's stories you will find that an accusation of rape where there are custody issues is sadly not unusual.

I have deleted your and your ex's surnames from your post as it is important that you cannot be identified, anyone with a computer can read your post as this is an open forum.

In fact, on second thoughts, as the family matter has already gone to court, I have also anonymised the locations.

[markanthony]

thank you and yes I dident realise that when I wrote it

[Faith]

Hi Mark, I hope it has helped to vent your experiences onto the forum.
It is a long read so I hope you'll forgive me for just looking at the gist of it.

Your main priority should be to source a good family law solicitor to support you in this and to maintain any records (texts, social media) of anything that could show this to be a spurious allegation.

I can only echo Casehardened advice not to make any identifying posts with names or specific locations anywhere on the web or on social media.