Need some advice :/

[Cookie Monster]

My boyfriends younger sister has falsely accused him of sexual assult and rape. She has said this happened 6-7 years ago. He is 18 now and we have a baby on the way. He was accused in September '13. It is now march and got a lot more serious. He is not allowed to even visit his home where his mum, dad and younger sister who is now 15 live. I never thought it would get this far. In 3 weeks he has to go to court. I would like to know what is likely to happen to him. He is in pieces and I just wish this nightmare would end. Is anything likely to happen with no evidence?

[tiger mum]

Hi Cookie Monster - welcome to the forum. Firstly - good for you reaching out for help and standing by your boyfriend.

I'm not a legal advisor - just a mum who's son was accused. The people who visit this forum are in many different situations - but the common theme is one of despair being subjected to a false allegation.

Your boyfriend is very young to be dealing with such allegations - he must feel very scared and isolated. I realise bail conditions are protecting his sister - but how are his parents and wider family reacting? I can't imagine how difficult this must be for the two of you.

The advice we picked up is try and get a specialist solicitor who deals with defending rape allegations. There are ones who act on legal aid but changes in funding mean they are harder to find.

I'm sure that more qualified advice re the practical issues you face will be posted soon. Maybe you could show him some of that advice as it will be sympathetic and well founded and it may take some of the pressure off you. If he's not well advised and prepared he might not do as well in court and it's time to come out fighting x

[Cookie Monster]

Thank you tiger mum. It is so hard and stressful ATM. His mum and dad are really struggling aswel. It's hard to talk to my boyfriend about it because he gets so upset and I'm trying my hardest to keep his mind occupied to make this time a little easier for him. His biggest worry is how this will affect our unborn child when it's born, it's meant to be a happy time but its just full of worry instead. He got given a solicitor in November but its really hard to find a specialist one. What was the outcome of your son? And did everything get sorted? Xx

[tiger mum]

Hi Cookie Monster - yes it's all over for us. The police decided not to refer the case to the CPS - there was no witness or forensic evidence to support her claims - and there was several flakey versions of what happened - she was also drunk and high - oh and she changed her mind about wanting my son prosecuting - not much of a case. However at the start back in nov we didn't know that.....

One thing I did learn - even though my son and his accuser were both 14 at the time, if my son had been found guilty of rape he would have been held accountable for it. I know your boyfriend would have been 11 or 12 - I think you need to find out what penalty he would pay now if he were found guilty of something he did as a child.

Also the accuser's word that the assault happened is submitted as evidence. I asked that question of the police and they are told/trained to believe the accuser's version of events as the truth. I had the chance to query this with the investigating officer and she confirmed that in her opinion the fact my son's accuser changed her story many times, the more serious accusation she made at the police interview is the one they believed.

So even if it is ONLY the word of the accuser they have to go on they will go to trial and let the jury decide if she is believable. The police believe the accuser automatically.

I've been told these are very difficult cases to defend as the defence is restricted in what they can do to discredit her story. They will be looking for holes and getting other witnesses to back up her version. I fear in your boyfriends case this may well be his family - what an awful thing for any parent to do.

I really feel for all of you - what a complete mess. Xx

[Cookie Monster]

Tiger mum, I'm really pleased you are all sorted now. I really fear the worst for my boyfriend, it's an awful thing for his sister to say. They did say back in September that if she had said he was 10 they would not have been able to do anything but because she has said it happened when he was 11 that it is taken seriously- she's obviously planned this well. The biggest problem we have is that she has told her friend so the police have his sisters story and her friends story. It's word against word. I didn't realise that her word can be taken as evidence. It's scary to know how easy it is for people to ruin others lives.
In your honest opinion what do you think will happen at court?
It is a huge mess, and he doesn't deserve it at all, he's the victim not her.
Thank you for your support xx

[is there justice?]

Hi Cookie Monster

I'm so sorry to hear you and your b/ f are going through such an awful ordeal.

Can your b/f think of any possible reason for his sister to make this up? Have they had a falling out?

Was his sister friends with the other witness at the time or is this something that she told her recently, maybe for effect or attention? Is his sister prone to telling lies? My son used to tell the tallest stories in the world!

If necessary get help for both of you from your GP. You need to take care of your baby bump.

[Cookie Monster]

Hi, his sister told her friend a couple of weeks before telling police. She has always wanted to be an only child but the police say that is no reason for her to make it up. She has lied about suicide before but apparently this goes against my boyfriend.
Can't even imagine how he is feeling at the moment, I'm just trying to keep him hopeful and trying to keep his mind off it. Each time he thinks about it he just breaks down.
Do you have any idea of what the outcome at court could be as it is jut word against word? Or are try likely to make it more serious and believe his sister? Xx

[Casehardened]

Hi, his sister told her friend a couple of weeks before telling police.

As she has only told her friend comparatively recently this evidence will not so significant as if she had told her around the time the offences were supposed to have occurred as the defence will argue that this is just part of the plan to implicate her brother.

Unfortunately, as TM says, her own statement cannot be so easily discounted as the prosecution can offer various explanations as to why she didn't speak up earlier.

[is there justice?]

Hi CM

Unfortunately no-one can predict the outcome. It will depend on how both your b/f and his sister come across, any inconsistencies in her story, the effectiveness of your barrister and ditto for prosecutor.

Hopefully the jury will see holes in her story. Maybe she is jealous of the attention the forthcoming baby is getting and feels left out. The friend is basically only hearsay a long time after the event. It's up to your barrister to poke holes in her story. Since the alleged event, has she been happy to be in your b/f's company? Maybe he has taken her out or babysat her and she's been fine with that. It's not easy to lie in court, well it's not easy to keep lies going at all.

It must be very hard for your b/f to discuss anything. He will be missing his family and be tremendously hurt by this allegation but it's great that you are supporting him.

It's so difficult to predict the outcome. I wish we could tell you it was straightforward. Try to stay strong. Xx

[Cookie Monster]

Thank you, wish it could be more straight forward. The strange thing is that she acted really friendly with him, it was like nothing had been said. When I was younger I was sexually assaulted and I refused to be anywhere near the person. I'm just Hoping that the judge sees through this. This is already ruining his life does anyone think this could result in prison? Xx

[myhome]

Hi Cookie Monster and welcome though very sorry you have found us. You have been given some great advice already. Have a look at this link as it will give you some idea of the process.....
http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...at-happens-now

It is impossible to predict what will happen at court. These historical cases are almost always one person's word against the other. It is up to the Prosecution to try to persuade the jury he did and it is up to the Defence to try to persuade the jury that he didn't, and ultimately the jury will decide.
HOWEVER, some cases never get as far as court and are NFA'd (No Further Action) before then. Some are due to got trial and are stopped before the trial. Some go to trial and the trial gets stopped part way through for lack of or poor "evidence"; so go right to the end and end in Not Guilty and some end in Guilty; so you see there are many many different outcomes. Each case is different and even though on the face of it there are similarities one cannot be compared with another because if inherent differences.

I'm really that we cannot reassure you or tell you what you want and need to hear....

There are things you can do though- monitor her FB and other social media pages/text messages/emails etc to see what she is saying, how she is behaving and how she is reacting. Screenshot anything and everything that looks like it could be useful and store it electronically where the police can't get it.

You both need support; many of us have found our respective GPs to be very helpful and supportive. Also, we are here and we will help you all we can..
Keep strong ..... MH

[tiger mum]

Hi again Cookie Monster - told you others would be along to give you some support. Hopefully you won't feel so alone now. You've been on my mind today - you must be so worried about so many different aspects of your situation.

Are you going to be a young parent like your boyfriend? Just thought I'd ask as if you are a teenager too you sound like you have wisdom beyond your years. When is your baby due? X

[Cookie Monster]

My home- thank you for all the information, there's still hope. I never thought it would get this far but hopefully it won't go any further and the jury will see through his sisters twisted lies. Don't know how anyone can be so spiteful. She isn't the victim it's him that's the victim. He was so close to his mum and dad to just be taken away and be treated like a criminal must be the worst thing, thank you for your support, it means a lot. X

[Cookie Monster]

Tiger mum- yes I will also be a young mum, I'm 18 and I know it sounds bad and sounds like I'm just 'another young mum' but I have been through so much my whole life and feel I'm a lot maturer for my age than. My baby is due on September 9th, I really am hoping that all this stuff with my boyfriend gets sorted, he really wants to be a dad. Also this forum is helping so much, it's lovely to think that complete strangers can offer so much support at this stressful time. Xx

[whatsgoingon?]

Hi Cookiemonster, welcome to the forum. Congratulations on your forthcoming happy event, I think that all desired pregnancies and births are a blessing (except at my age and over! )

In an earlier post you mentioned that it's very hard to find a specialist solicitor - have you looked on this link? You can also post a request for someone in your area. Some sols are happy to travel within reason.

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...ist-solicitors

The better your representation, the greater your boyfreind's chances of proving his innocence. Having someone who has a proven track-record of defending sexual allegations and dealing with young people is SO IMPORTANT. As MH has already said... at court it's a question of who can best persuade their case to the jury, in other words make your boyfriend look like he probably did or didn't do these crimes .
Having a good legal team behind him will give him the confidence and stamina to get through this.

In the absence of evidence, one of the things could prove invaluable to your b/f is character references, not only from professional people (eg an old head or teacher, an employer , GP, youth leader or church if he's been involved with any of those). It can also be from family friends and his own friends - anyone who has known him a long time and can vouch for his good character. It's worth drawing up a list to discuss with his solicitor.

It's understandable that he doesn't want to discuss it, it must be incredibly hard for him to come to terms with. I had the same thing with my son (he was 20 at the time). However, he needs to prepare for it, sort out his legal team etc and come to grips with what his sister is claiming.
I found making a pact to only speak about it for a certain time at a certain time and at no other was the only way to get round it.

He's very lucky to have you behind him.
Take good care of yourself.