Son falsely accused of rape.

[Concerned Parent]

My 15 year old son has been accused of rape by a former girlfriend. He was 13 at the time of the alleged offence and she was 14. The alleged incident dates back nearly 2 years but she has only recently made the accusation. They stopped going out over a year ago and have remained friends and stayed in contact (both face to face and through social media) until very recently. He is being interviewed at the police station tomorrow. We have a solicitor who will be with us during the interview.

Although our solicitor has found out from the officer dealing with this case that there is no intention to arrest him tomorrow, I am beginning to have really bad feelings about what might happen. Our solicitor did mention the possibility of a Youth Caution (or worse) which would mean his name being on the sex offenders register, which could really mess up his future chances of college or a job. If we refuse a caution, when then happens? Any advice would very gratefully received.

[o my god]

hi if they offer a caution I think it means that they don't think the cps will take it to court, but don't hold me to this. there will be other members which will know more and will about later, just remember the police are not your friends they have targets you will never think of the police in the same way again after this.

[whatsgoingon?]

Hi Concerned parent - I'm very sorry you find yourself on here and in these circumstances.

I believe that you can only be cautioned if there is proof you did something or you admit to it.
If he didn't do it then there's no proof and he certainly shouldn't admit to it as this could affect the rest of his life.
OMG is right though.... they probably don't feel it's a safe bet and therefore want to try and get him t admit to it so that he can become one of their positive statistics.

There are several Mum's of accused teenagers on the forum at the moment. You might like to read their stories.
Good luck for tomorrow.

[whatsgoingon?]

Here are the other Mum's /parent's links: http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...Distraught-Mum

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...990-Broken-mum

You might find it useful to read their threads and get in touch but one thing that quickly becomes apparent on here is that no two cases are the same even though there may be strong similarities.

[Angry and frightened]

Hi concerned parent, I can not help on the legalities of this, but one thing is very true - DO NOT TRUST the police, you really WILL not think of them in the same light again, after this. You have found the right place, though, to get help and advice. The members on here are excellent, whether you need legal advice or emotional support, although they are not all on here at the same time, they will answer your questions. I wish you luck and that your bad situation is resolved as soon as possible x

[myhome]

You must advise your son not to admit to a "lesser charge" in return for anything they may offer. As soon as he does that it cannot ever be retracted. If he is innocent he must keep saying so

[Concerned Parent]

Thank you all for your comments. Interview seemed to go ok today and our solicitor was very helpful. Will have to wait until the New Year to see what happens.

[Coltay]

Other parent

Thank you all for your comments. Interview seemed to go ok today and our solicitor was very helpful. Will have to wait until the New Year to see what happens.

Hi there, I have just been reading your thread and sincerely hope it is over soon for you. I am also going through a similar situation with my son and the not knowing is hard especially when it goes on and on. My son was offered the same as your son but he turned it down immediately as he felt it was not right to accept a lesser plea when he hadn't done anything. We are now waiting to hear the outcome they said we would know by the 13 Dec but I won't be surprised if they keep us waiting longer.

On a brighter side one of the parents son on this forum has just received a not guilty and they are now ready to celebrate christmas. Please be careful with the police.

[smokiejo]

Hi upsets me to see yet another mum on here in similar situation to me and others here if you want to chat x

[Concerned Parent]

What really gets me about the whole is how the girl in question can shamelessly tell lies to the Police in a video interview, knowing the consequences my son might face. It also really annoys me that the consequences for her, if hopefully the Police drop the matter, will be absolutely nothing! She really is a sick, twisted individual.

[Ghost biscuit]

Hi,

Just read your post and have been thinking....why is it that the girl at 13 is the one being sexually exploited and the boy the 14 is a perpetrator didn't she in your sons case want to experiment? When I was 14 many years back I can remember a few times that girls and I experimented because we was curious they were like 13,14,15,16 and 17. So if I went to the police now and said when I was 14 this girl took advantage of me when I was 14 and she was 17 would they really take it seriously, would they say I was sexuality exploited by this girl?

Or should I now be worried that the girls might have some sort of counselling later on in life for something unrelated, might now have false memory syndrome and say they remembered being raped. So now they go to the police and make a formal statement to this effect. The police come and arrest me and say oh the girls were between 13 and 17. I say wasn't this just two teenagers innocently getting to know each other? No. Oh well, then if the girl was 16 and 17 did they not sexually exploit me? No you have allegedly raped them. Then I am arrested.

What I am trying to say is a lot of teenagers over the years have and will continue to have sex. curiosity being the catalyst. Do we now as we get older start to worry if our teen past comes back and gets manipulated and could possibly get us a prison sentence. I have no answer, but teenagers today face a lot of pressure from FB to porn sites on the internet. I had to tell my older children a few years back that if you take pictures of your girlfriend/boyfriend and they are 15 going on 16 and I believe in this country below 18 then they could be charged with child porn images even though they are the same age. This could ruin them for the rest of their lives.

Also as my son is in university I have told him to be very careful about the situations he is in. He listened to me because I am on bail for a crime I have not committed. It really gets makes my blood boil that teenagers cannot be teenagers in fear of being arrested for innocent curiosity.

I am just sorry for you and your sons in this situation and the police having no sense. This is where I think evidence should be vital. Not just her word against his.

Regards,

Ghost....B

[Concerned Parent]

Ghost Biscuit,

My son was actually 13 at the time of the alleged offence, she was 14 (she is at least 6 months older then him).

Of course kids of that age experiment and he has admitted having consensual sex with her. I'm just blown away that she has had the gall to make the accusation so long after the event when they were still friendly (even though not going out) until quite recently. She is now in a relationship with a 21 year old and we think that she is being manipulated by him (and her stupid mother who allowed my son and her to be unsupervised in her house!).

[Ghost biscuit]

Hi,

Well there you go she was the older one and was supposed to be raped yet he was 13 and younger and he is the one being accused. In his defence he should say that she sexually exploited him as she was the older one. If the ages was the other way round the police would use that one on him. Makes no sense one rule for another for others. In my eyes he may say it was consensual but he should think back and maybe he felt under pressure as she was older and was sexually exploited by her. therefore charges should be brought against her as he was 13 he may of felt vulnerable and scared to say no to her. But that is just my opinion. Hope everything works out for the best.

Regards,

Ghost....B

[Casehardened]

Hi,

I posted this link from CPS guidelines for another member whose son is in a very similar situation but it may also be of interest to you:

It should be noted that where both parties to sexual activity are under 16, then they may both have committed a criminal offence. However, the overriding purpose of the legislation is to protect children and it was not Parliaments intention to punish children unnecessarily or for the criminal law to intervene where it was wholly in appropriate. Consensual sexual activity between, for example, a 14 or 15 year-old and a teenage partner would not normally require criminal proceedings in the absence of aggravating features. The relevant considerations include:

the respective ages of the parties;
the existence and nature of any relationship
their level of maturity;
whether any duty of care existed;
whether there was a serious element of exploitation.

http://www.cps.gov.uk/legal/v_to_z/youth_offenders/#a29

[mumneedinghelp]

My son was found not guilty of one count of rape and 2 counts of sexual assault last Thursday after the jury had deliberated for less than two hours. It brought nearly 13 months of worry to an end and luckily we came out of it without too much suffering. My son remained strong throughout even though he convinced himself he had no luck and was going to be sent to prison.

What annoys me is that the basis of the prosecution was his facebook messages which he printed out and gave to the police twice. He was happy to print them out because he thought her messages showed what sort of a woman she was but they picked up on his messages where he called her names and decided they were threatening and a reason for attacking her. On the first day of the trial, before it started, he was offered a deal that they would drop the rape charge if he pleaded guilty to the sexual assaults which obviously showed they didn't think they would get guilty on the rape charge. Of course he said no.

I still find it hard to understand why they thought there was a 51% chance of getting a conviction. I am sure they were thinking as police and not as normal members of the public because her story was ludicrous. My son's account of the events was sensible and he first gave his account 7 hours before his arrest when her dad and ex came to our house and smashed up his car. That was the only trouble we had as luckily his FA lives in a different town from us.

Everyone going through this horrible false accusation must stay strong and as I kept telling my son before the trial - "You are telling the truth and have repeated the same account over and over again. Don't be bullied by the prosecution and stay calm. A liar will easily slip up". I didn't see him being cross-examined because I was a witness (although not used) but his girlfriend said he was really calm and answered all the questions and was so confident to even ask the prosecution a couple of questions. He shouldn't have done this but they were logical questions which did stump the prosecution. The FA on the other hand went to pieces. She lied about sending the facebook messages and going on a date the night before and she shouted out that she was afraid of my son to which the defence barrister said "then why did you say you wanted to meet him the night before and why did you let him into your flat"

I get annoyed when I keep hearing that there are not many false accusations. My son said that yesterday there was a lad who had been falsely accused on Jeremy Kyle and his accuser was on and she had done it before! With £11,000 compensation each time it is disgusting. Something should be done about the compensation because I think it just encourages false accusations.

I wish you all the best with your fight and hopefully you will get NFA.