Help me please!

[heartbroken123]

Hi,

I have posted previously about this but things have got worse, allot worse. so i'm gonna start again from the beginning to give you a full understanding of what had happened as i really need some good advice as to what to do from here as everyone i have spoken to about this had been giving me shady answers.

this nightmare all started in late August. my girlfriend left to go to her university to sit an exam she ha been very worried about this as the outcome would determine if she would be able to keep her place at the university. she left like any other day kissing me (quite passionately) telling me she loved me and adding she would be back at 4 o'clock that afternoon. she returned not 5 mins later saying she forget to take my keys with her so she could let herself in when she got back, I gave her the keys and she kissed me again and off she went. nothing felt out of place everything seemed good. 4 o'clock came along and she was nowhere to be seen sat i though she must just be running late. At around half 4 i called her phone but no answer. Later her mother contacted me on facebook saying she had met up with friends in town and was staying out for a bit, she assured me that she was safe and she had asked her mother personally to contact me as she knew i would be worried. i accepted this and went on with my day.

at around 1.30 am the police showed up at my house. my first instinct was that something had happened to her so i ran out on the front to meet them i asked them what was wrong is she ok? they assured me she was ok and asked me to join them in the sitting room. it was then that they told me that she had mad an allegation that i had been touching her in her sleep and videoing this. my hear sunk and i didnt know what to do from there i was so upset and confused that i could barely answer the questions the police were asking me as they were conducting a search of my bedroom and seizing whatever they deemed necessary to aid them in there investigation. i was then arrested and taken to police station where i spent the next 23 hours. in this time they interviewed me and put the evidence to my solicitor, which was a initial statement from her and the videos that she had taken from my phone and put onto a usb device. these videos do exist but they where completely consensual and she was not asleep during the making of them. it was her idea to make the videos and they didnt not show full sex they where just foreplay.

my solicitor advised me to conduct a no comment interview. i have now changed solicitors and my new solicitor has told me that was not good advice. i was released shortly after the interview and bailed under certain conditions, not the approach her, not to go into certain parts of town, not to contact her in any way myself or through a third part etc. i stuck to these conditions and was a shadow of myself for a few weeks. my family saw how much this was effecting me and borrowed me some money to go and see my sister out in Ibiza, on my way to get on the plane she contacted me on facebook through one of her friends accounts. i ignored this but then she started calling my phone constantly all the way through security and i continued to hang up. i got to the departure lounge and she called again and again, eventually i picked up and simnply said i am not allowed to talk to you and put the phone down she continued to call so i answered again, i heard screaming on the line. now i loved this girl sooo much it was a sickening thought that she was in trouble so i started to shout down the phone are you ok? no reply then the phone went dead. she called back around 20 mins later i answered and she said if i didnt talk to her she would kill herself. i thought she was lieing and being dramatic so i put the phone down.

upon returning from Ibiza, i found out that she had in fact, attempted to kill herself. this upset me and i was very concerned for her welfare. she then began to contact me again telling me her address and inviting me to come over. i went over and saw her she threw her arms around me and told me she loved me and that she had been missing me dearly and that this was all a big mistake. she said she had been confused, that the stress of her exams had initiated a bipolar episode as she suffered with the mental ailment all her life. i loved her so i chose to believe her. i began seeing her again and she was coming up with a plan of how to make all this go away. i felt happy again and after the nightmare i had been through up to this point i really wanted this to work.

now the other day i returned to her address to go to bed as i had been staying there. as i turned the corner to her house i noticed a police car waiting outside. i took off and contacted her on facebook she told me to go round the back and wait til they went so i did. when it seemed that they had gone i entered the property through the back door only to be greeted by a police officer who put me under arrest. i thought this would be for breach of bail conditions. i was wrong. she had made a second allegation that i had been raping her in her sleep.

i got arrested at 1.10 am in the morning and the police kept me in custody for the maximum 24 hours, they then applied to the inspector for a 12 hour extension. 10 mins before i was due to be released the cps got back and instructed them to charge me. it was 1 pm i then had to stay in custody for a further 24 hours until i could be seen in court. this was the worst experience of my life as you can probably imagine. i went to court and was granted bail.

30 hours of freedom went but and then the police knocked on the door saying i was in breach of my bail. i was arrested again and taken to the same police station where i found out that she had made a statement to the police accusing me of trying to contact her. they had no other evidence of this other than her word. they kept me in custody for another 30 hours and i went to court again where the judge said there was not sufficient evidence to suggest that i had in fact breached my bail. i was re-bailed.

and that leads me to the present i have been free for the last 24 hours and i feel like i am going insane. every noise outside makes me think they have come to take me again. this thing is ruling my life and i have done nothing but look up the best way to kill yourself whilst i feel down then ill have a burst of determination and read up about what to expect in prison. i have no faith in the system which is why i am expecting justice to be miscarried and for me to wrongly jailed. from what has happened can people please give me honest answers on whether they thing i will be sent to prison for this. it is consuming my every thought and i just need some second opinions here

thankyou for reading and taking the time to help me i really do appreciate it.

[Casehardened]

Hi HB123,

I've removed her name from your OP as anyone can access and read this forum.

Your phone's call log (if it was a mobile; if a landline then your bill from the line provider will show her number) will show that she has initiated the contact calls so you should not have been accused of breaching bail!

Of course the fact that she has lied about this should raise doubts about the rest of her statements.

[frightened spouse]

Hi was hoping that your absence from the forum meant that things had resolved themselves.

Is your new solicitor a specialist in defending fa's as this is essential in giving yourself the best chance at trial. Also have you kept all communication between yourself and your girlfriend since this all began? Your girl friend's medical history will be key to your defence along with these communications. I realise it is difficult not to dwell on the worst case scenario and no one can give you the reassurance you seek, but try and focus your energies into putting together your defence.

It goes with out saying do not respond to any of her attempts to make contact in the future, but make sure they are recorded.

Really sorry things have got so much worse for you, your girlfriend is obviously very unwell to have acted this way.

Take care

FS

[babygal2014]

OMG, what a horrendous experience you have been through. I cannot imagine how you are feeling through everything you have been put through. It breaks my heart reading this knowing that it would have taken an enormous amount of strength and forgiveness on your part to try and rekindle the relationship with her after what she has already done to you. So many in your situation would not have given her the time of day and she repaid you by setting you up.

Now you must fight against her attention seeking lies and for most importantly your innocence, your future life and your freedom. I must stress that it would be very foolish of you to allow this girl to worm her way back into your emotions. YOU MUST avoid all contact with her at all costs. Otherwise you will be digging your own hole and making the CPS job really easy. Its really serious now, you cannot afford to get caught with her again.
If she tries worming her way back remember your innocent of her lies and she is trying to punish you by taking away any chance of a future from you. Punishment for these type of offences affect you long after a prison sentence. You will get put on the sex offender register. Which means constantly being monitored by the police and never being able to raise a family

So the most important thing you can do now is look for the best defence team you can afford that has experience with sexual offences and false allegations. I think there is a link on the forum to a number of good solicitors.

Then some important points I picked from your experience would be:-

* To show your solicitor your mobile phone call history and text messages if you still have your phone.
* Screenshot your conversations on facebook and forward them to your solicitor as well. This would be valuable evidence in your defence.
* Get your solicitor to have a dig if possible into her medical records, see if she is diagnosed with bipolar and how many suicidal episodes she has had in the past. Might be important in weakening her credibility.
* Also get your solicitor to check if she has made previous allegations against anyone else, maybe a family member or friend when she was younger. She seems to be experienced in the police process and has well manipulated you in order to make her lies be believed by the plod.

Keep your chin up and stay strong!

[liveclaim]

Hi mate. I know how you feel. I had similar nightmare just couple months ago..

My ex also had Bipolar disorder. What do you even think about breaching your bail conditions?!?!?!? You've just made your case complex.

If your ex written message from Facebook friend's account - make sure you show this message to police officer, so he can take notes, if you go to court - you may have witness in your favour, if police take action based on message and interview fb account owner.

Also, you received calls from your ex, if it was to your mobile phone, make sure you get your phone analysed by forensic experts ( private experts works too, if police will have doubts they'll do their own. ). Sometimes texts and calls is enough to smell bull****, but it depends really on case officer discretion, so if you show them report about your phone from forensic experts, you'll be in better place.

This two things you have to do now. Just to prove good characteristic side, you went to your gf because she was screaming on the phone, right. You love her, and wanted to help her.

Have you even told your lawyer about calls you're receiving??? I have doubts...!

And the rape accusations... I don't understand why you've been charged in 36 hours? So fast? I mean, there's gotta be some undisputed evidence so CPS are convinced they'll get conviction.

Your first step is to prove your case officer that you ex called you, messaged you on facebook from her friend's account. Without that police officers will think you're thug and don't even give a **** about bail conditions.


----

My girlfriend accused me of sexual abuse, she has bipolar disorder also... She called me after I was bailed, wrote emails to me, tried to "bump at me" in mall, places I hangout on weekends, so I recorded everything. I even requested that my emails would be analysed. I recorded every place she tried to bump at me ( so police can check CCTVs. ). I recorded every phone call she made to me. I recorded every words she said to me when she "accidentally" met me in the mall. My case officer was very rude and aggressive ( as I'm not British, I'm European, came here 6 yrs ago, so he immediately thought that I'm freaking thug. ) Huh. So... I gave my case officer some records ( calls my ex made, places where I met her "randomly" and I told my case officer that in cameras you'll see how I tried to avoid her but she wanted to chat with me ), I also gave him my references from school, uni, and college. After couple weeks he called me and said that we don't see any case here, but said he'll have one more interview with the 'victim' so I had to show up for my bail date. My bail date went well, better than expected. She admitted lying about me when police officer had interview with her. I want her punished, but my lawyer says she'll get punished but not jailed, as she registered with mental something.

Some tips from my experience:

Don't trust cops.
Don't talk or give something to cops before talking with your lawyer.
Forget your ex, dude. I understand you love her, but in times like that , the last thing you need additional police problems.
I'm kinda sensitive dude, so when I was accused I was having very hard time. It's normal. Just talk to your family, your friends. Pay visit to your GP.
Keep records of everything.

And if you've been charged with rape based on falsely accusations.. man.. That's the time to start real war. Real fight. Stay strong and keep fighting.

[breakmyheart]

a lesson to be learnt

Hi,

I have posted previously about this but things have got worse, allot worse. so i'm gonna start again from the beginning to give you a full understanding of what had happened as i really need some good advice as to what to do from here as everyone i have spoken to about this had been giving me shady answers.

this nightmare all started in late August. my girlfriend left to go to her university to sit an exam she ha been very worried about this as the outcome would determine if she would be able to keep her place at the university. she left like any other day kissing me (quite passionately) telling me she loved me and adding she would be back at 4 o'clock that afternoon. she returned not 5 mins later saying she forget to take my keys with her so she could let herself in when she got back, I gave her the keys and she kissed me again and off she went. nothing felt out of place everything seemed good. 4 o'clock came along and she was nowhere to be seen sat i though she must just be running late. At around half 4 i called her phone but no answer. Later her mother contacted me on facebook saying she had met up with friends in town and was staying out for a bit, she assured me that she was safe and she had asked her mother personally to contact me as she knew i would be worried. i accepted this and went on with my day.

at around 1.30 am the police showed up at my house. my first instinct was that something had happened to her so i ran out on the front to meet them i asked them what was wrong is she ok? they assured me she was ok and asked me to join them in the sitting room. it was then that they told me that she had mad an allegation that i had been touching her in her sleep and videoing this. my hear sunk and i didnt know what to do from there i was so upset and confused that i could barely answer the questions the police were asking me as they were conducting a search of my bedroom and seizing whatever they deemed necessary to aid them in there investigation. i was then arrested and taken to police station where i spent the next 23 hours. in this time they interviewed me and put the evidence to my solicitor, which was a initial statement from her and the videos that she had taken from my phone and put onto a usb device. these videos do exist but they where completely consensual and she was not asleep during the making of them. it was her idea to make the videos and they didnt not show full sex they where just foreplay.

my solicitor advised me to conduct a no comment interview. i have now changed solicitors and my new solicitor has told me that was not good advice. i was released shortly after the interview and bailed under certain conditions, not the approach her, not to go into certain parts of town, not to contact her in any way myself or through a third part etc. i stuck to these conditions and was a shadow of myself for a few weeks. my family saw how much this was effecting me and borrowed me some money to go and see my sister out in Ibiza, on my way to get on the plane she contacted me on facebook through one of her friends accounts. i ignored this but then she started calling my phone constantly all the way through security and i continued to hang up. i got to the departure lounge and she called again and again, eventually i picked up and simnply said i am not allowed to talk to you and put the phone down she continued to call so i answered again, i heard screaming on the line. now i loved this girl sooo much it was a sickening thought that she was in trouble so i started to shout down the phone are you ok? no reply then the phone went dead. she called back around 20 mins later i answered and she said if i didnt talk to her she would kill herself. i thought she was lieing and being dramatic so i put the phone down.

upon returning from Ibiza, i found out that she had in fact, attempted to kill herself. this upset me and i was very concerned for her welfare. she then began to contact me again telling me her address and inviting me to come over. i went over and saw her she threw her arms around me and told me she loved me and that she had been missing me dearly and that this was all a big mistake. she said she had been confused, that the stress of her exams had initiated a bipolar episode as she suffered with the mental ailment all her life. i loved her so i chose to believe her. i began seeing her again and she was coming up with a plan of how to make all this go away. i felt happy again and after the nightmare i had been through up to this point i really wanted this to work.

now the other day i returned to her address to go to bed as i had been staying there. as i turned the corner to her house i noticed a police car waiting outside. i took off and contacted her on facebook she told me to go round the back and wait til they went so i did. when it seemed that they had gone i entered the property through the back door only to be greeted by a police officer who put me under arrest. i thought this would be for breach of bail conditions. i was wrong. she had made a second allegation that i had been raping her in her sleep.

i got arrested at 1.10 am in the morning and the police kept me in custody for the maximum 24 hours, they then applied to the inspector for a 12 hour extension. 10 mins before i was due to be released the cps got back and instructed them to charge me. it was 1 pm i then had to stay in custody for a further 24 hours until i could be seen in court. this was the worst experience of my life as you can probably imagine. i went to court and was granted bail.

30 hours of freedom went but and then the police knocked on the door saying i was in breach of my bail. i was arrested again and taken to the same police station where i found out that she had made a statement to the police accusing me of trying to contact her. they had no other evidence of this other than her word. they kept me in custody for another 30 hours and i went to court again where the judge said there was not sufficient evidence to suggest that i had in fact breached my bail. i was re-bailed.

and that leads me to the present i have been free for the last 24 hours and i feel like i am going insane. every noise outside makes me think they have come to take me again. this thing is ruling my life and i have done nothing but look up the best way to kill yourself whilst i feel down then ill have a burst of determination and read up about what to expect in prison. i have no faith in the system which is why i am expecting justice to be miscarried and for me to wrongly jailed. from what has happened can people please give me honest answers on whether they thing i will be sent to prison for this. it is consuming my every thought and i just need some second opinions here

thankyou for reading and taking the time to help me i really do appreciate it.

Hi,
I seem to recall that your earlier thread stated that your girlfriend had dropped the charges and you were aiming to patch things up.
However I think that people underestimate the seriousness of police bail conditions and in consideration that you are aware of her capability of lies and the serious allegations reported should have had your guard up. It isn't clear as to weather the original allegation had been dropped via the cps which would have determined the safety of resuming any type of contact,, and furthermore im sure along the way that there were enough threads on here and your legal team that would have pointed out the obvious risks that you undertook in breaching the conditions. I do not mean this to sound harsh but I, as many others know all too well the difficulties and suffering that not being allowed near or no contact your loved ones causes.
The evidence that the police have submitted to the cps has had significant impact to bear charges and in my opinion was probally triggered by the fact that you were caught going into her domain. It remains that you should never be tempted or lured into any thing to do with her until it is fully resolved and the written consents verified by the oic .
I believe that full investigations will be carried out on all of her allegations and presented to the cps , and meanwhile I hope that you have found a sol that specialises in fa cases. It is opportunity for you to write a full account of the lies and distortions with copies of the phone logs , all of which is for your defence team , and as you have been charged it is the beginning of the fight for you.
Please think carefully , and stick to the bail conditions, as next time you might not be freed, and meanwhile you may well find it beneficial to see your g.p whom will help .Im sure your parents will continue their support and will help no end.
Keep strong, think wisely and keep posting.
regards b.m.h

[Rights Fighter]

I would not advise giving any Facebook evidence to the police. All that will happen is that they will tell her you have this, she will block you so you cannot have access to hers any more - something that could be helpful later on.

Hopefully you have taken screenshots of the PMs and conversations you have had with her on Facebook - keep these safe and show them to the solicitor.

Facebook evidence IS admissible at trial. I know because one was recently dumped on the 2nd day due to evidence I had obtained which proved the complainant to be 'unreliable' and 'not a witness of truth'.

[liveclaim]

Hopefully you have taken screenshots of the PMs and conversations you have had with her on Facebook - keep these safe and show them to the solicitor.

Facebook evidence IS admissible at trial. I know because one was recently dumped on the 2nd day due to evidence I had obtained which proved the complainant to be 'unreliable' and 'not a witness of truth'.

This is strange. Are you saying that facebook screenshot evidence is admissible at trial?

I would not advise giving any Facebook evidence to the police. All that will happen is that they will tell her you have this, she will block you so you cannot have access to hers any more - something that could be helpful later on.

I shouldn't worry about that. Not many solicitors/cops know, but Facebook can provide full details about messages ( including user agent, ip, message content, full sender profile info, cookies ) quite fast. If crime is involved, or messages can help investigation - profile owner have no rights to privacy, no data protection act and etc.. Facebook servers ain't local, that means sender message will be kept in their servers for the long long time, doesn't matter if sender deletes it, or sender blocks the receiver. Facebook will always provide details about message/profile if it helps investigation.

[Rights Fighter]

Depends on context but yes - that trial was stopped due to the evidence from Facebook that I screenshot.


Facebook is notoriously very awkward about giving information to the police or defence so please don't expect miracles. Facebook will not always provide details required. They didn't in the case I was involved with despite many requests. And I know that they have offered no help in many other cases despite requests for assistance.

Please don't expect anything from Facebook. They "might" help - but there is no legal obligation for them to do so and they rarely will.

[liveclaim]

Depends on context but yes - that trial was stopped due to the evidence from Facebook that I screenshot.


Facebook is notoriously very awkward about giving information to the police or defence so please don't expect miracles. Facebook will not always provide details required. They didn't in the case I was involved with despite many requests. And I know that they have offered no help in many other cases despite requests for assistance.

Please don't expect anything from Facebook. They "might" help - but there is no legal obligation for them to do so and they rarely will.

There is no need for miracle when you're asking help from Facebook. They will not show "good faith" in providing information if you don't follow their stated rules. For example - If your case involves juvenile, and you request full details about account content, I can guarantee that your request will be denied if there is no witness summons or court order. There are ways to get information about juveniles if Facebook believes that profile content will not harm any parties and will help investigation - but you can't request full details about profile content. If you state in your request that you want full details about message, account or access to account - you will get nothing.

Next year will be published more information about data requests from Facebook. Just wait and you'll see how percentage of return changed. Just a reminder - about 68-70% of requests were approved from January to July in 2013. You'll see big change in percentage next year, just wait for it.

--

By the way, when I was accused (london), I told my solicitor that I believe there could be some evidences that I'm not guilty in my ex's facebook account too. He told interviewer that we have reasons to believe that there could be some evidences of perverting the course of justice ( or something like that ) in victim's facebook account and said that someone ( gov official ) needs to contact facebook and ask for account preservation just in case to save evidence. During my re-bail day I've been told by interviewer that they also received information from facebook ( as they requested account data too ) and just days before my re-bail my ex admitted on lying, so she was charged ( but I'm not sure how the case will end as she has mental problems, not very serious tho ). I'm not sure that every solicitor does that, but my guy is very well-know solicitor in London and our family has connections with his firm since 05 or 06, can't remember. I will send you a press link when it's all done. There will be some interesting comments to read for someone who's trying to gather evidences in social media websites.

EDIT: I'm shocked your case was dropped just from picture. It's so easy to fake screenshot by inspecting elements in your browser. I thought there are some kind follow-ups on the evidences for example logging in to account to check if message exists, or request confirmation from Facebook..

[Rights Fighter]

That just goes to show how much you know about Facebook evidence. I have put the simplified version on here.

Oh by the way it wasn't my case. I work for a criminal defence solicitor who specialises in these cases. Such evidence also assisted the father of a young lad to see his son after his appeal against conviction succeeded in 2008.

Telling the police about Facebook evidence is the worst thing you can do. The profile owner will block you, the police are unlikely to follow up any leads that will assist the defence case (although they do sometimes but I wouldn't trust them to do that).

Readers on this thread will make their own decisions as to what they do about the advice they are given.

[heartbroken123]

hi thanks all for advice

this situation is sending me insane but your right need to stay strong and construct my defense. i have spoken to my solicitor and the police about her medical records and they have told me the only way we can access them is with her consent and it is highly unlikely that she would do that.

both of our facebook accounts are being checked over by the police and there they will find evidence that supports both her version of events and mine as in the interview i was shown facebook messages that i did not write but had been sent from my account to hers. but there is also messages on my account that will help me like her saying she loves me and doesnt want to loose me on the same day i was supposed to have commited the offence, phone calls, texts, and other things she.

and yes the case was going to be dropped we were in the process of doing that then this happened now i feel like the whole thing was a ruse so she could trap me as i dont see any other reason for any of what she has done.

[Rights Fighter]

If there is a good enough reason/argument for the medical records of the complainant to be obtained, it is possible that this can be argued before a Judge, who might rule that they should be made available regardless of whether she gives consent or not.

Make sure you have screenshots (not copy and pastes) of all relevant posts so you have them saved. You don't want them 'disappearing' from the internet and conveniently 'lost!'

Motive is VERY important in cases where the only evidence is the word of the complainant and what he/she told others. You need to think long and hard about why she should do this. It's one of the first questions the jury would ask themselves during deliberation.

[heartbroken123]

This whole thing is making me go crazy. I have done nothing wrong and i have been locked up for days so far and this has the potential to take years of my life away from me. i keep thinking that the court is going to see some girl that appears completely normal crying and spilling out this picture of me that will make them think i am some sort of animal. everyone keeps saying that i am innocent until proven guilty but i havent seen any evidence of that in the way i have been treated so far. i mean 90 hours in 5 days completely on my own unable to eat because of my paranoia is just stupid! i feel like i have been convicted already. the old saying 'mud sticks' comes to mind and i am completely unable to do anything about it im having constant thought of suicide iv even spent most of this evening online researching how to do it most successfully. i know to some of you it might seem a bit extreme but i have not had the best life and things always seem to go bad for me no matter what i do and now this. its like my life was supposed to be completely ****ing **** until im either killed or i do it myself. i loved that girl with all my heart and i have never trusted anyone before as i sed i have not had the best life, and i trusted her and this is what has happened its ****ing horrible and i dont know how much longer im going to be able to bare this. thanks everyone for all the help and im sorry if this post has alarmed you but i have nowhere else to vent or even talk to anyone about this stuff and this is really how i am feeling so if you see in the news in a few days that i have killed myself then blame it on people why does everyone in my life have to turn out to be lieing horrible selfish dickheads when i do nothing but try my hardest to show them love and respect. the world doesnt like people like me it takes advantage of the fact that i am willing to believe that people can be good when we cant we just like to pretend that we are all better than the ****ing animals that we are the only difference between us and the animals is that we use our intelligence to be even more malicious, vindictive and just down right evil towards one another. people dont care what you have done for them they will just use you to get themselves out of trouble be it borrowing money off you because they know you are nice like that then never paying you back because they owed it for a loan or for drugs or any other kind of debt the deem more important than you or something as serious as this where its got to a point where it is me or her and she will just lie through her back teeth and try and ruin my entire life!!!!! i cant cope with any of it any more im ****ing done so thanks for your help but there is only one thing left for me to do **** this **** i dont wanna be around 99.99999999999999% of the worlds population and to the tiny amount of you out there like you guys who have taken the time to try and help me out of the good of your heart im sorry i wish i had more people like you around in my real life but we are so few and far between that im just not that lucky. so ok thank you and im pretty sure this is the end for me so goodbye people and god bless.

[Casehardened]

Hi again HB123,

It's in my nature to offer practical rather than emotional support so hopefully someone will be along to offer better support.

However on the practical side it seems your feelings are coloured by the fact you love/loved the girl and therefore cannot understand why/how she can accuse you of this; I'm tempted to quote the old clichés about attempting to understand women but it is hardly appropriate now.

However you have great advantages in your defence for the jury compared to some cases (always remember that they will make any final decision about your guilt or innocence, not the police or CPS) the girl is not a minor making a decades-old accusation of historical child abuse against you; and you can easily prove she has contacted you to apologise (and therefore initiated/provoked the breach of bail)

Most in your position contemplate suicide at some point but if successful this simply causes mutterings under breaths from the prosecuting side (or in print!) of " I told you so".