husband falsely accused of historic sexual assault by step daughter

[frightened spouse]

Hi so glad to have found this forum thank you to everyone involved for providing such a valuable resource.

My family's ordeal began when police visited the family home to inform us that my daughter had made allegations of historic csa by my husband (her step father) that had supposedly happened when she was when she lived with us. My husband was ordered to leave the family home immediately, leaving me to care for our three young children alone.

He was interviewed by appointment with a solicitor present regarding the allegations but not arrested. I attended the police station with him and the investigating officer spoke to me briefly in the entrance of the police station. I was not aware until after my husband had been interviewed that my daughter had alleged that she had been assaulted on a number of occasions and that she had disclosed the abuse to me. I subsequently sent the investigating officer an email refuting that she had ever disclosed to me and also outlined the complicated and back ground history of the relationship breakdown and between myself and my daughter/ex partner. I believe this is largely down to the fact I was unable to send her further money she had repeatedly requested. There is also long standing resentment of the fact that we have been financially successful in relative terms whilst they have fallen on hard times.

Since then I have sent two further emails to police requesting I be given the opportunity to make a formal statement but these have been ignored. I have asked for my local police force to be involved ( as the investigating force is in the north of england and I am in the south east) this has also been rejected.

My husband and I are really struggling with the lack of information, we really have no real detail of what my daughter has alleged as her account is pure fiction. We have been told the investigation is drawing to a close but how can it be thorough if I have not been interviewed. I thought our computers would also be taken away for forensic examination but that has not happened either.

I never thought ten weeks ago that we would still be in this situation , I see from other posts that people endure this for months and even years ! The contact arrangements for the children are relatively relaxed compared to other cases I have seen on here, my husband manages to see the children at weekends if supervised by a family friend that has clearance.

Any suggestions/comments very welcome.

[is there justice?]

Hi Frightened Spouse

Welcome to the forum but it's always disappointing to see a new face.

I know several members will be along with excellent advice as they have been/are going through the same thing. Your hub is very lucky to have regular contact with your other children but even so, it must be incredibly hard for you all.

The waiting game seems to be par for the course. I hope you get closure soon but for now, this is a great place for help and advice.

[frightened spouse]

Thanks

Hi Frightened Spouse

Welcome to the forum but it's always disappointing to see a new face.

I know several members will be along with excellent advice as they have been/are going through the same thing. Your hub is very lucky to have regular contact with your other children but even so, it must be incredibly hard for you all.

The waiting game seems to be par for the course. I hope you get closure soon but for now, this is a great place for help and advice.

Thank you for the welcome. I only wish I had found this site earlier, as it has been a real eye opener. I started to have my doubts about the impartiality of the police some time ago, but when I look at what others have experienced it is truly frightening. The problem is that when an investigation drags on and on , outsiders who have no experience of this believe there must be a lot to the allegations, when in actual fact investigating officers take extended periods of annual leave during investigations and are in no hurry to complete investigations. The average man or woman on the street like to think we have a fair, efficient police force something along the lines of what you see on The Bill. The reality would seem to be very different.

At the beginning of this I really thought police would see the FA for what she is a vengeful, spiteful young girl but the current climate appears to consider all complainants are genuine when this is clearly not the case. It is hard for most people to believe that someone would go to such lengths, and the idea that someone can have such hatred for my family is very unsettling.

[Casehardened]

Since then I have sent two further emails to police requesting I be given the opportunity to make a formal statement but these have been ignored.

Hi,

I fear that this is because your statement is not going to corroborate the false accusation as per your 'brief conversation' with the OIC.

Undoubtedly if you had supported your daughter's allegations you would have been straight into the interview room! However, heaven forbid, should this go any further, your husband's solicitor will take your statement.

[is there justice?]

At the beginning of this I really thought police would see the FA for what she is a vengeful, spiteful young girl but the current climate appears to consider all complainants are genuine when this is clearly not the case.

For me, that was one of the most shocking things about it all- it destroys your basic beliefs in the system. BDC will tell you 'the plod are not your friend'.

[frightened spouse]

Very alarmed

Thank you for your responses is therejustice and case hardened .

Initially I though the IO was reasonable stating that the information I had given would be taken into account, but in subsequent weeks when I have managed to come up with additional info I have been ignored.

I thought CPS guidelines to police stated that an investigation should also condsider information that supports the fact that an allegation may be malicious, but maybe I dreamt it.

Do the cps take into account polygraph results when deciding whether to make a charge? There is no one piece of evidence that disproves my daughter's lies but if all the information we have, is looked at it must at least cast serious doubt on her credibility and her motivation for FA

[Boys don't cry]

BDC will tell you 'the plod are not your friend'.

Hello and welcome Frightened spouse.

I was exactly like you and most of the members believing the police are here to protect and serve.
Unfortunately not when you are falsely accused of a crime (but I do admit I met one who was fair).

In my case I did nearly what you did.

I went to the police station with three hand written pages and I made the mistake not to photocopy them.
The police officer told me "You seem to be a good man".

I went to a closer police station to get a few clothes from my fa as I became homeless and didn't have the right to contact her by any mean.

I went again to this police station as I was crying and needed some help.

I wrote another letter to the police and by chance my solicitor told me to stop writing to them and to give him this last one.

When I went to trial it was extremely difficult for my barrister to get these three pages from the police.
It took him around three months and he even asked me if I had written them.
He managed to get them the first day of trial.

My second visit to the nearest station became one of the biggest surprise of my life.
The police officer who offered me some tissues and a coffee wrote in her statement that I came to admit my guilt.
I never ever said anything like this and thanks to the truth and an excellent barrister we managed to prove that she must have misunderstood.

I called the police one week after being arrested to see my son:I saw him one year and a half later.

...

Only trust a specialist solicitor Frightend spouse.
Stop emailing or trying to contact the police.
Always make a copy of what you send and be extremely careful with what you write.
It could easily turn against your husband.

The good news is truth will prevail so you must keep confident.

Take care.

[frightened spouse]

Thank you for your kind words and advice BDC , this has been a very shocking experience which I'm sure many on here would agree is an understatement.

I have copies of everything I have given to the police, I was probably naive in thinking if I didn't seem very forthcoming it would be taken as a sign of a lack of belief in my husband.

I still don't understand why our computers haven't been taken as I thought this was standard, though as we have 43 police forces I would imagine they all have their different systems.

[whatsgoingon?]

Welcome Frightened Spouse. A shocking experience ... HUGE understatement. Now you'll learn something about the 'innards' of society.

Brilliant advice from BDC, as always. I'd just like to add, that if your husband is ever charged (let's hope he's not) and it goes to court, everything you posess which can disprove the allegation may be used by your solictor, so keep it all in a safe place. Write down any little detail of events you feel could be significant (with dates and names of those present) which would testify to your husband's attitude and relationship with your daughter. It may be that his solicitor would want you to be a witness.

So far as the computer goes, it doesn't always get taken, and sometimes it does when there seems to be no earthly reason for it.

[frightened spouse]

Thanks for all your responses it is fantastic to have place to come to voice concerns, where there are such altruistic individuals prepared to give you their time, knowledge and support. It means a lot.

My husband is one of life's great planners and we are already preparing for a charge as it helps to feel a little bit more in control if you have plans. Prior to this I would never have believed that her allegations would have been taken seriously and I never thought she would go through with the statements and video "evidence" I didn't think she was capable of going to such lengths, but it appears her position is entrenched

[Casehardened]

My family's ordeal began 11 weeks ago when police visited the family home to inform us that my daughter (18) had made allegations of historic csa by my husband (her step father) that had supposedly happened when she was 12/13, when she lived with us.

I thought our computers would also be taken away for forensic examination but that has not happened either.

I did not wish to give you any false hopes but as you mentioned that you are both mentally preparing yourselves for a charge I think it is fair to say that if the police were certain that the offences had occurred they would have made a 'dawn' arrest with the object of conducting a search for evidence of 'an interest' and seizing the computers for analysis.

As your husband wasn't arrested I presume he wasn't required to give a DNA sample which is another positive!

[frightened spouse]

I did not wish to give you any false hopes but as you mentioned that you are both mentally preparing yourselves for a charge I think it is fair to say that if the police were certain that the offences had occurred they would have made a 'dawn' arrest with the object of conducting a search for evidence of 'an interest' and seizing the computers for analysis.

As your husband wasn't arrested I presume he wasn't required to give a DNA sample which is another positive!

Husband wasn't arrested, interview by appointment however he was DNA swabbed and finger printed which I gather is not normal procedure. Sol claimed it was good to be seen to be cooperative. As we have never had any prior contact with the police neither of us had any knowledge about this.

[edinguy]

Husband wasn't arrested, interview by appointment however he was DNA swabbed and finger printed which I gather is not normal procedure. Sol claimed it was good to be seen to be cooperative. As we have never had any prior contact with the police neither of us had any knowledge about this.

I wasn’t arrested but went in voluntary to be interviewed by police. My DNA was taken during a break in interview.

I never gave fingerprints until I was charged though more than a year later.

[Lucky]

i doubt DNA is going to be much use for the CPS with a historical accusation

whatever you do, make sure you get a good solicitor to make enquiries of the police. they have to give disclosure to your brief, and they can then pass this onto you.

it helps with the 'not knowing' stage

[myhome]

Hi and welcome and as ever so sorry to see yet another new person here. You've been given great advice already and I would like to echo the positives that have been given you - I was "invited" to be interrogated last Nov over historical abuse from 23 years ago. I haven't been arrested or charged either. The longer it goes on the more I'm beginning to believe that it won't go further.......sincerely hope this is the case for you both too.....you'll get loads of advice and support here.....keep strong.....MH