What the **** is the point of living after a false accusation?

[barney]

Don't waste any more of you life on this...move on. trust me I know how hard that is, I have tried taking action against the CPS and Police and it just wasted my time and effort and made me feel worse and more angry and frustrated. Time does not heal in this case but it does allow normality to come back into your life.
I also feel that I could never trust another woman again but we can'y allow ourselves to believe that all wonem are evil as they are not so again, in time you will learn to trust again. Take a break from this forum and anything else that reminds you of this terrible time in your life and find something new to do and concentrate on that.

If you allow your life to be changed and let this haunt you then she has won...... dont let the ***** do that to you.

[lawlessone2009]

Mmm...

I found reading to be quite a useful tool when it came to dealing with the situation I found myself in.

I was lucky as I seemed to be inadvertently drawn to the correct book at the correct time.

Strangely when everything was 'over' for me as far as charges were concerned I was reading Andy McNab - Bravo Two Zero. It made me feel incredibly selfish and immature to let things take such a drastic hold over my life and change me in so many ways. We may all think we're going through hell and it does of course feel that way but it all pales in significance compared to what others go through.

The entirety of the situation surrounding rape allegations and sexual assault is somewhat new to me. I am sure you've seen the media stories about various witch hunts etc. What I cannot understand is that people are indirectly being conditioned to be selfish, greedy and think only of themselves (capitalism) and yet somehow be kind and considerate towards others and especially when it comes to things of a sexual nature.

I'll never be a capitalist.

I had written more but started ranting... When accused or charged or jailed or whatever the entirety of what you are facing consumes your life, it takes over. Get some 'happy pills' from doctors and also FOCUS your energies on something else for a period of time (DIY, work, reading, holidays).

[frightened spouse]

Reading these posts has made me realise how differently people are affected by being falsely accused, I have huge sympathy with those that find themselves fa'd by someone in their local area who feel unable to escape from the speculation even when it is supposedly over. I also think your relationship status with the person who falsely accused you is key. If it was a wife, girlfriend or daughter it really eats away at the bonds of trust that are supposed to be intrinsic to family, your whole belief system is challenged. Although our case is ongoing I really don't know how I feel towards my daughter, I just feel sorry that her life is so terrible she has felt the need to do this.

I also feel that your stage of life when FA'd is also an important factor on how you move on. Barney's comment about not wasting too much time and energy on making complaints against the police and CPS in the aftermath is really valuable to me. I believe that moving on with your life in the best way you can to achieve some kind of contentment is the ultimate goal.

Best wishes to all

Frightened Spouse

[whatsgoingon?]

Reading these posts has made me realise how differently people are affected by being falsely accused, I have huge sympathy with those that find themselves fa'd by someone in their local area who feel unable to escape from the speculation even when it is supposedly over. I also think your relationship status with the person who falsely accused you is key. If it was a wife, girlfriend or daughter it really eats away at the bonds of trust that are supposed to be intrinsic to family, your whole belief system is challenged. Although our case is ongoing I really don't know how I feel towards my daughter, I just feel sorry that her life is so terrible she has felt the need to do this.

I also feel that your stage of life when FA'd is also an important factor on how you move on. Barney's comment about not wasting too much time and energy on making complaints against the police and CPS in the aftermath is really valuable to me. I believe that moving on with your life in the best way you can to achieve some kind of contentment is the ultimate goal.

Best wishes to all

Frightened Spouse

I'm in total agreement. I thank God it didn't happen round the corner from me ( I'd have been very tempted to move to another area ) I feel so sorry for people who's families are ripped apart. What makes someone you love turn on you is anyone's guess.... jealously? Feeling discarded? Payback for something you never even realised ? Or perhaps they have some personality disorder.

I also like Barney's comments - we also want to make a stink! But...... sometimes you just have to say 'Let it be!' Why waste more time, more energy, more precious moments to achieve more anger, resentment and fraustration.