It can't get worse??????

[can it get worse]

Had an absolutely awful evening. Just want to cry & cry but have to carry on. Had lots of advice from you & really really grateful to you but feel so upset and helpless. I'm trying to look thru lots of threads for help and encouragement and similarities of our own case but cannot focus and feel hopeless.
I don't know what else to say. I pray that this will go away as it is just so hard. The restraint in place for my husband (not bail conditions as police did not think it was necessary) is heart breaking and not fair to all involved. (not fair is not a strong enough word).

[RFLH]

I'm sorry you're feeling so down. Have you got anyone you can talk to about this? It really does help if there is.

[Scared Mum]

I kind of know how you're feeling!! A living nightmare!! Last thing you think about before you go to sleep (if you're lucky enough to sleep!) and the first thing you think about when you wake up! Struggling to eat, carry out normal day to day tasks! It's the most horrible, frightening thing in the world! Sending you a virtual hug! Keep as strong as you can!

[Innocentguy1983]

Had an absolutely awful evening. Just want to cry & cry but have to carry on. Had lots of advice from you & really really grateful to you but feel so upset and helpless. I'm trying to look thru lots of threads for help and encouragement and similarities of our own case but cannot focus and feel hopeless.
I don't know what else to say. I pray that this will go away as it is just so hard. The restraint in place for my husband (not bail conditions as police did not think it was necessary) is heart breaking and not fair to all involved. (not fair is not a strong enough word).

Hi there

Please know you are not alone, all the feelings you are experiencing.. I am going through them to.

Whatever happens, you can get through this.. I have to believe it....people may judge, but family and friends that know you will stick by you.

Every day that goes by, is a step closer to peace.

Sending all my positive vibes for you guys

Take care IG

[aussieone]

I'm sorry you have had a such a bad day. I know exactly how you feel, we still have a long way to go, and some days i just want to curl up in a ball and sleep this nightmare away. There is nothing wrong or weak about having a bad day, tomorrow is a new day, just try and pick yourself up and start again. One day this will all be over
On really bad days try and distract yourself...read a book, cooking helps me, go for walk or to a coffee shop.

[whatsgoingon?]

Hi Canitgetworst? So sorry you're feeling so down. Looking at other people's threads can be great for gaining information but can actually sink you deeper into doom and gloom as you comiserate with them and try and draw parallels. As has been said before everyone's case is different, taking a break from here can be a great tonic. If you feel you don't want to do that, concentrate on the stickies which contain factual information.

There are long periods throughout this process where there's very little you can do except try and enjoy the little things in life -sometimes you have to push yourself. If you're not in a frame of mind where you can take pleasure in everyday things, going to see a good film, play or concert can be godsend as it'll occupy your mind completely. Taking up some kind of meditation or relaxation and regular excercise can also be a tremendous help.

It won't be until there's a formal charge and you have statements etc infront of you than you can really do something (apart from outlining the background to the alleged event and sounding out a solicitor in your area which I posted a few weeks ago).

It's a horrible, horrible situation but there is an end to it. Big hugs

[myhome]

Hi CIGW - really sorry you're feeling so low but sadly it's part of the rocky road of the hell that we're all living. This is small comfort or even none at all, but you will start to go back up again even though that's hard to believe right now...
As has been said - every case is different and although there are some similarities these can't be used to predict a next move by plod/cps, or an outcome of your case.... for a bit of a lift, search "bananas" on here and see how many success stories there have been....these cases are winnable it's the waiting, the fear, the unknown and the prospect of the wrong verdict which is so very hard to bear.....

Keep strong, keep posting and keep active and treat yourself to some valuable "me time" pampering.........

[can it get worse]

Thank you t all you lovely people

I've not turned on my computer all day !!! and found lots of hugs and kind words of support - all of which are very relevant.

As has been said - every case is different and although there are some similarities these can't be used to predict a next move by plod/cps, or an outcome of your case.... for a bit of a lift, search "bananas" on here and see how many success stories there have been....these cases are winnable it's the waiting, the fear, the unknown and the prospect of the wrong verdict which is so very hard to bear.....[/I

Thank you 'myhome' your words are very accurate - I do feel I'm constantly searching for the same case as ours & want to draw conclusions and answers.

There are long periods throughout this process where there's very little you can do except try and enjoy the little things in life -sometimes you have to push yourself. If you're not in a frame of mind where you can take pleasure in everyday things, going to see a good film, play or concert can be godsend as it'll occupy your mind completely.

Thank you whatgoingon - I have no choice but to function every single day due to the restrictions placed upon us by S.S. But this causes pressure as I cannot have even one minute to myself. Going to see a film would be a lovely distraction but unfortunately cannot do this.

I feel in a surreal world where everybody around me is carrying out their happy daily lives but I am living in this total nightmare with no signs of an end.



I]Scared Mum


I kind of know how you're feeling!! A living nightmare!! Last thing you think about before you go to sleep (if you're lucky enough to sleep!) and the first thing you think about when you wake up! Struggling to eat, carry out normal day to day tasks! It's the most horrible, frightening thing in the world! Sending you a virtual hug! Keep as strong as you can!

Thank you scaredmum - It is so awful that so many of us are going thru such terrible emotions and feelings - Sleep....... I had a terrible night......when everything is hunky dory - I sleep fine but last night hrdly slept but then another day starts where I have no choice but to paint my smile on and get on with it! What a wonderful day sunny day we have had but we live under this shadow of darkness.

I sincerely thank you all for taking the time and effort to send me your posts. Can't say I feel better but it is so comforting to know there are lovely people out there and can be bothered to support even me. I hope at some point I will be of use to others on here who are suffering like this.

to you all xx

[is there justice?]

CIGW (and SM)

Big hugs to you both

The unfairness of it all coupled with the waiting puts an unimaginable strain on all involved - no wonder we sometimes think we can't cope. Lack of sleep is just torture and breaks down your resilience. Sometimes you just have to let it all out or go mad.

It's hard to enjoy the weather, exercise, laugh at a comedy on tv, bother about what to eat etc. These things are our bodies' fuel though and even if we think we can't enjoy them they can help fend against the black hole of depression.

You aren't on your own and here are people who believe you and will support you even if only with words.

[can it get worse]

CIGW (and SM)

Big hugs to you both

The unfairness of it all coupled with the waiting puts an unimaginable strain on all involved - no wonder we sometimes think we can't cope. Lack of sleep is just torture and breaks down your resilience. Sometimes you just have to let it all out or go mad.

It's hard to enjoy the weather, exercise, laugh at a comedy on tv, bother about what to eat etc. These things are our bodies' fuel though and even if we think we can't enjoy them they can help fend against the black hole of depression.

You aren't on your own and here are people who believe you and will support you even if only with words.

Thank you ITJ, Your words are so welcome and understanding. We are all having the same feelings but somehow feel useless and there is such a wide range of different emotions. I do mostly manage to get off to sleep fairly quickly - probably due to juggling so many balls every day!!! But then wake up numerous times and this is the first thing in my head. I feel shocked that this is not an actual nightmare and it really is happening. I constantly worry what effect this is having on our parents. I'm so angry & sad of the possibility (due to being elderly), they could pass away in the midst of all this when they are broken hearted by what this accuser is doing to us. But then think maybe this is what the accuser is hoping to do. We all have a free will and choice of what we do - And above all we have a conscience and we all know right from wrong.