My 17yr old son falsely accused of rape, our world has been turned upside down.

[archie]

On 28th January my 17yr old son was arrested for rape on a 17yr old girl who was his friend. He was at an 18th Birthday party with all his friends. Days prior to the party he had been flirting and texting with this girl who is also an ex girlfriend.. During the party he went outside with the girl and had consensual sex with her. He then left the party but she stayed and then she went on to having sex with his friend,. Two days later both boys arrested for rape and bailed.
Last Friday both boys have been charged. My son has been charged with Rape, attempt rape and two counts of sexual assault and the other boy two counts of rape. None of it makes any sense. Since the event she has been out partying and her life has not changed.. I feel like our families world has been turned upside down. All my sons friends have given witness statements and all say that that this is a joke, but I cant get my head around it and it is turning our lives upside down.. My family is struggling to function on a daily basis and my sons behaviour seems to be self destructive as he just says he does not understand as he has done nothing wrong and why is she ruining our life. In magistrates court on 8th July for please hearing and then will be referred to Crown Court but already been told could be as long as October.. How do we get through this..

[cantgiveup]

On 28th January my 17yr old son was arrested for rape on a 17yr old girl who was his friend. He was at an 18th Birthday party with all his friends. Days prior to the party he had been flirting and texting with this girl who is also an ex girlfriend.. During the party he went outside with the girl and had consensual sex with her. He then left the party but she stayed and then she went on to having sex with his friend,. Two days later both boys arrested for rape and bailed.
Last Friday both boys have been charged. My son has been charged with Rape, attempt rape and two counts of sexual assault and the other boy two counts of rape. None of it makes any sense. Since the event she has been out partying and her life has not changed.. I feel like our families world has been turned upside down. All my sons friends have given witness statements and all say that that this is a joke, but I cant get my head around it and it is turning our lives upside down.. My family is struggling to function on a daily basis and my sons behaviour seems to be self destructive as he just says he does not understand as he has done nothing wrong and why is she ruining our life. In magistrates court on 8th July for please hearing and then will be referred to Crown Court but already been told could be as long as October.. How do we get through this..

Sorry you had to find us, but there is lots of lovely people her who can offer a lot of support and good advice. I know very little of the legal system but know how you are feeling as the supporter of someone who has been accused. The first few weeks are the very worst, shock, disbelief, and pure fear...it does ease off a little as time goes on and you learn to life in a very surreal kind of normal, unfortunately until you are charged and your sol receives all copies of statements etc there is little you can do but wait.

In the meantime though, ask your son to write as detailed as he can remember statement of what happened before, during and after the incident. Record all texts, screenshot any social media posts..anything you can find or think of that may support your sons statement or discredit the accusers. This needs to be kept very safely, ideally backed up on your PC and copied to an external hard drive, copies also given to your sol for safekeeping. It also seems to be the general advise not to give any evidence to the police but to pass it to your sol who can decide what to do with it. General thoughts seem to be that the police can and will give the accuser the opportunity to change his / her statement if there is evidence provided that proves her original one to be inaccurate

Do you have a specialist sol - it is vital you have a sol and barrister experienced in false accusations.

Take care of yourself and your son, you need to look after yourselves in order to fight this. Keep posting here, it has been a lifeline for me. I too find the waiting the worst part...it has been said that the mind can cope better with a certain tragedy that uncertainty...unfortunately the system is the system, the police / CPS have a job to do, it takes time and we have to accept it

If you haven't already done so it may be a good idea for you and your son to see your GP, they can be very supportive, mine certainly was.

CGU xx

[whatsgoingon?]

Hi Archie - Welcome to the forum. I'm very sorry you found us the hard way though... .
If it helps, my son was charged and went to trial for a false allegation of sexual assault and is now through the other side (it took over 16 months) .

You've been given some very good advice by CGU. I would just add to that....

If the witness statements have been given to your son or yourself, then keep them to yourselves and hand copies to your solicitor. If they were made to the police, I believe they should have a copy, in which case they may be willing to let you have a copy, or tell you exactly what they said. Mistakes are sometimes made, things lost, it's best to be on the ball. If you don't have a solicitor, then now is the time to start looking for a specialised solicitor in your area - you'll find a thread on this site.

I believe the magistrates hearing is just to formalise the charge and establish his correct identification etc. I'd just make sure someone goes with him and is there for him afterwards. The plea hearing will be at the crown court and then the trial a few months after that.

There are several people supporting thier son's on here at the moment, it's worth looking at their threads , and the stickies in general information.

Well done for supporting your son, -

All the very best.
WGO

[whatsgoingon?]

Just a thought... are your son and the other guy being charged together? If so, it's worth discussing with your solicitor the pros of cons of this for your son.

They may be presenting it to the CPS look like it was a 'gang' rape - in which case it's very important for your son to be able to prove he'd already left etc.

This is the link for the specialist solicitors: http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/s...sed+solicitors

I can't emphasise enough how important it is to have a competent, experieced legal team to defend your son.

[mumneedinghelp]

Hi, I too am the mother of a son falsely accused of rape and 2 sexual offences. He has his plea hearing at crown court next Friday and I have been quite emotional this week while my son acts as if nothing is happening. We don't live in the same town as her or know anyone who lives there but from the pictures on Facebook she is getting on with her life as normal and is in a relationship and has a new house. Her lies are bad enough but her mother has recently made a statement. She is not a witness to the alleged rape but her account of what was supposed to have happened is worse than her daughters and then she states how depressed her daughter is, how often she cries and can't sleep. It makes me so angry that there are people who can be so cruel.
keep posting to get help and support. I find that just putting down how I am feeling helps through the bad times.