son fell asleep

[mariex]

Please Please Help me... I am at my wits end,three weeks ago my son was arrested on the accusation of rape on a 13year old girl, he went to a neighbours home (where they have alot of people in and out going for a drink)... they are the neighbours from hell, anyway my son went down to there home and a few beers crashed out and fell asleep, he woke up then made his way to our home which they only live 5 doors away, after an hour of him being in bed ,we where all awoke with a banging on the door at around 3.15am, they was arresting him on the accusation of rape, i was devasted, i stayed up all the morning.
His boss rang to pick him up for work at around 11am, i told him what had happened and he raced around to the home of the alledged victim,(he knows the family aswell) the father was home and he asked the father was his daughter ok, father replied "yes shes fine, he was then asked was she screaming was she crying and was she bruised, the father replied NO and his daughter was ok and actually admitted nothing had happened and his wife was making something out so small into a big issue and all he could do was stand in the back ground then in his next breath he pulled out a new mobile phone he had just bought of the car boot, if my daughter had been raped i wouldnt be going to no car boot,
I then went to police where my son was being questioned, they would not let me in the police staion and spoke to me outside the officer who spoke to me said "i will put your mind at rest and the accusation made about my son was not has serious has it had been made out to be and my son was doing ok. i was sobbing like a little girl.
I then noticed the alledged victim walking the dog at a round 8.30 right past my house on the same day he had been arrested
He went to court on the monday and was released on bail ... we can go and see him ... in the meantime the accusers are now saying theres no medical evidence has she had a shower that night.
The family are trying to wave to us when they are going past,and also try to speak to my other two children the father told another neighbour that he saw my hubby at the front door and didnt know whether to wave or not.
They are telling everyone that there daughter was raped ..the father knows my son didnt do anything, the pain my family are going through is unbeleivable, there is no medical evidence we have been told ....... please help on what my family and son can do to ease our pain.... is next court appearance is in june ... it makes me sick seeing the daughter outside laughing and joking .... my son is feeling depressed has he is inside a bail hostel surely the police and the courts will no they are lying xxxx thanks for reading my lenghty message

[diana_holbourn]

Sorry to hear about what's happened. Hopefully, things will work out. You could always try contacting FASO (False Allegations Support Organisation) to see if they can give you some advice or recommend a specialist solicitor.

Maybe your son's boss could testify in court about the conversation he had. If he's a respectable member of the community, it might hold quite a lot of weight. Also, it might help convince people your son's innocent if you can tell people spreading rumours about your son that his boss might be willing to speak for him.

[mariex]

Thanks Diana,
The family are now saying to residents in the area that there wont be no medical evidence has she had a shower,Thats funny has they have no shower..... luckily other neighbours are saying they dont believe the family in question, it still doesnt bring my lad home, I really thought they would have dropped this ludricous allegation but they havent..... what makes me laugh they are trying to wave and the other day there was an accident and my 15 year old daughter was being a little nosey and they where driving past and asked her what was going on (the mother asked) she was put on the spot and answered her i was so angry that she and the rest of the family are trying to catch our attention, i know if my daughter had been raped i would not have gone to a car boot 3 hours after, i also would not let my daughter take the dog for a walk in the dark the same evening at around 8.30 surely she would be petrified, there is so much i can say but it would go on and on, im not upset anymore my anger is homing in on me.
I dont think the family realise what the police told me about the allegation not being has serious has its been made out to be... and admitting to my sons boss nothing happened
What if the courts believe this young girl and mother and my son goes down for a false allegation, [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/sad.gif[/img] Thankyou for your help i appreciate any advice and help given to me x x x

[diana_holbourn]

It sounds as if there might be quite a lot of evidence in your favour. If you can talk to your solicitor and try to arrange for things to be brought up in court like the fact that the family claimed she had a shower when they haven&#39;t actually got one, and the fact that she was laughing and joking so soon afterwards and walking her dog in the dark so soon afterwards, it might put a lot of doubt into the jury&#39;s mind as to whether anything serious could have happened and whether they&#39;re telling the truth.

Also, since there might have been quite a lot of people at the party, maybe your son could think as hard as he can about whether anyone was there for most of the time he was who saw him a lot of the time and might be prepared to stand up for him in court and testify that they didn&#39;t see anything bad happen. Or if the family say it happened after he really went home, maybe someone could remember what time he went home?

[ali]

Hi Sad Mum,

My heart felt sympathies for what you are all going through.

A couple of points i&#39;d like to add that may be worth exploring - firstly, without wishing to be too graphic, even if the girl had had a shower, there is a likelihood that there would still be dna inside her&#33;

Secondly, if the family of the girl continue to try and make communication have a word with the investigating officer, tell him/her whats going on, and ask that they tell them to refrain from contacting your family, failing that press your own charges against the family for harrassment&#33;

Above all, try and stand united as a family, and look after yourselves, it can be a long drawn out experience.

Keep us informed.

Ali XX

PS - Contact FASO if you can, they are VERY good.

[mariex]

Thankyou ali,

I spoke to my sons solicitor whom i have told everything, she was very surprised to hear that they are trying to communicate to us .....
I feel loads better and alittle more confident, also alarm bells are ringing now has the young girl in question used to knock on the front door asking my son to go theres for a drink, and one evening in question the girls father asked my son was he going to a bbq they where having in there front garden ..before my lad replied yes or no i stepped in and said ...dont get him pissed on your whiskey and then send him home to us where we have to suffer, the father replied "oh he&#39;ll be ok if he crashes out he can sleep in our sons bed or our daughters bed (the girls bed in question).. now the alarm bells our ringing has to where the girl in question would have slept.......
I spoke to the solicitor today and told her the facts .... my sons boss his making the statement has to what the father said (luckily this week)


Thankyou so much to you all.....I feel like a weight of my shoulders have been lifted.... at least theres somebody here whom i can confide in and share my problem xxxxxxxx

[mariex]

WOW
Been to see my son tonight and he was in good form, The medical evidence on the girl in question has revealed that down below there has been no breakage and no dna from my son, also the bedding taken from the supposed scene is that contaminated with excrement and urine and other filthy things that they cannot find trace of any dna from my son and the bedding in question has not been washed in months.
I feel a little ease in the matter, all i can say what goes around comes around,...
Its still going to be a long hard battle for him and the rest of my family but i have some faith left, this site feels like i have a second family and i thank you all so much.
My sons solicitor is questioning the time scale, they let him walk out of the house accusing him of rape, he has been in his own bed an hour then we get knocked up at 3.15am by the police they arrest him and charge him.......... surely if your daughters been raped or fondled or any sexual activity you would make sure the person in question falls down stairs whilst your ringing 999 ................
Like i stated previous they saying there wont be no medical evidence has she had a shower when he left (what a joke)...........my son didnt have a shower has we havent got one.
HE SAID TONIGHT DRUNK OR NOT DRUNK HE WOULD HAVE TRIED TO CLEAN HIMSLEF IF HE HAD COMMITED THAT ACT&#33;&#33;
Luckily for my son, he fell asleep in his own bed fully clothed which proves he didnt try to cover anything up
I am so sorry for rambling on, please forgive me once again, thankyou for a life line on this site

[diana_holbourn]

It&#39;s good to know your son isn&#39;t depressed any more and that things seem to be looking up for him.

I&#39;m glad you&#39;re finding this site helpful.

[Saffron]

Hi Sad Mum

Don&#39;t apologise for posting here about how you feel. For many of us, this site has been an invaluable outlet for our frustrations and fears. I hope we will soon be hearing about your relief as well.

Make sure you look after yourself. Being the pillar everyone else leans on is exhausting, and you need to stay healthy and strong physically for your son. He is lucky to have you looking out for him.

Good luck, thinking of you.

[mariex]

Hi There,
Just to let you know things are still the same and no real progress, i am phoning the C.ID today has to one of the young children shouting to my youngest son "your brothers a rapist" i know its not alot to go off the wall with but we are trying to respect them has a family and my other two kids have not said or given any taunts about the allegation.
My lad at the moment is having good days and bad days which i keep telling him keep is chin up.
Can anyone answer me this .... if any medical evidence was present and i mean anything at all would they not re-arrest him and question him all over again, also ...me and his dad have not been questioned about the night in question, could it be the fact that theres no need and theres nothing to do him for ????? i just dont know what to think .. someone told me if there had been any dna of any sort they would have had him for questioning again and possibility of a re arrest???, like i said earlier , hes in a bail hostel and very much near to a school, would they have put him there if they thought he was a risk ???
Also another point what mother goes to the childrens primamry school and vitually brag about the allegation and then go to the kids youth club where the daughter goes and tell everyone whom she can see there, we have not even told our closes friends on account for my son and for the little brat in question .Like i say the mother is on a mission and she doesnt think shes doing any harm about telling everyone about what has supposed to have happened to her daughter. The daughter last week was telling a few people that shes had her last hepatitas A & B injections due to what my sone did to her. i felt sick to my stomach.
If anyone can answer my two questions above please reply with any information i would be so greatfull ..like i say he was questioned the once on the night he was arrested they have not been to see him since ...its been 6 weeks


Love to you all for all thats going through this
evil and twisted allegations.. xxxxxxx

[mariex]

my son was in a gross mood this week when i rang him, he spoke to me awfull he was f ing and geffing i told him to f...off and put the phone down, i am trying so hard to be a pillar of strentgh to my son and the rest of my household but i dont think i can go on any longer, i have wrote a diary since the allegation was made about my son, everythings going so slow.

I rang my son and apologised for my outburst and told him we are suffering just has much has him, i dont think he realises the contact i am doing with his solicitors and the C.I.D , also my diary which includes what people have said to me and other things relating to the allegation, i know hes going to be feeling down and isolated but so are the rest of us.


Thanks to you all
Sad Mum

[diana_holbourn]

Perhaps you could try reminding him of all the positive things, like the things you&#39;ve said on here, like questioning whether he&#39;d have been put in a bail hostel near a school if they really thought he was dangerous; and reminding him that his boss will hopefully say in court that the father admitted to him that nothing really happened and was behaving as if nothing bad had happened, and that he&#39;s already made a statement to the police about that; and that there was no medical evidence to prove he&#39;d done anything, and in fact it found there wasn&#39;t even any evidence that she&#39;d ever had sex; and that the police officer you first spoke to said the allegation wasn&#39;t as serious as you&#39;d first thought and that he could "put your mind at rest"; and that people can testify that the family llied, because they said she had a shower when they haven&#39;t got one; and that your son went to bed fully clothed, so they&#39;ll know he didn&#39;t try to cover anything up;and that the police haven&#39;t questioned you or his dad, so they don&#39;t seem to be taking it with great seriousness.

It seems as if there&#39;s lots of evidence in your favour. So hopefully things will work out the way you want.

Sorry to hear about the horrible rumours the girl&#39;s mother&#39;s spreading about your son. At least you said some people don&#39;t believe the family.

Has your son thought of everyone he can that could be a witness for him? It might help him and his mood if he can think back again to try to work out if there&#39;s anyone else who saw what happened who might speak up for him in court.

[Guest]

Hi there,
Nothing much has happened we are all still in limbo and plodding on.
My sons solicitor rang him on thursday and apparently the C.P.S have asked if they can have more time to find evidence, surely they would have got something by now its been 3 months, i dont know what to think anymore, i feel at the moment they havent got anything on my son so they are wanting more time, has anyones prosecutors (C.P.S) asked anyone on here for more time?????would be greatfull for any advice with this matter.
After the phone call between my son and his solicitor he just put the phone down, hes really had enough of the slowness of all this, he told me he would sooner go down for something he has done like giving the father and mother a good seeing too and not go down for something he has&#39;nt done................................ who and what are the c.p.s


Bye for now, take care
Sad mum xxxxx

[maria]

hi sad mum they are Crown Prosecution Service its cps for short they are the one&#39;s that decide if it goes to court or not.......... and if they think they have enough to make a charge stick they will go ahead but they do have to be seen to be doing something about it i hope this helps stay strong my friend hugs maria x

[mariex]

Hi everyone,
Just a quick update, my son went to see his solicitor this week and went through the video evidence of the girl in question, alot of things his solicitor has picked up on and alot of things she has said is a farce and does not conclude anything about my son, has for medical evidence there is nothing [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wink.gif[/img] ... has for the cps they asked my son to plead guilty and they will drop the rape charge and just have it has a sexual misconduct.................. obviously he is not going to do that he his pleading not guilty, his solicitor has ordered the girl in question to be medically examined again...... can anyone help me on the way cps have said sexual misconduct.... im feeling a little lost ...................... has anyone been in this situation like my son is going through with the guilty and not guilty bit, my heads in bits up to now



Thanks Sad Mum xxxx