Accused of Rape - Dafuq..

[Boys don't cry]

First of all Adam:

Second:

One question though guys. One of my bail conditions was not to contact her directly or indirectly. Seeing as it's over.. would you advise I send her mother and boyfriend a message of my version of events?

I had the same bail conditions and I had to make a huge sacrifice for more than two years to keep my pride and freedom.

Do not play with fire, accept your NFA and as I was told once by Casehardened:

KEEP CALM

AND

CARRY ON

[myhome]

Hi Adam - great news and although NFA is something of a double edged sword - at least it is over for you and I guess if she has said this time that she won't go to court, plod won't look favourably on it if she changes her mind - she'd have to have a good reason.....

with regard to pressing charges, I think I read somewhere that making a false allegation is not a crime so you may not be able to. In any case, whilst I understand why we would all want to do this, if you do it will drag it out for another umpty years and it will always be in your head. If you accept that mistakes were made and the outcome is unsatisfactory for you and leave it - you will then be able to begin to put this behind you and move on again with your life. I also wonder how your employers would react if they thought you were going to continue - just my thoughts -

But the best bit is hitting the button again.....

[Casehardened]

One question though guys. One of my bail conditions was not to contact her directly or indirectly. Seeing as it's over.. would you advise I send her mother and boyfriend a message of my version of events?

Very wise words from Myhome and BDC (as always!) and I will add another quotation which has always struck a chord with me:

"revenge is a dish best served cold"

[Adam]

It’s many years after the fact and this **** still keeps me up at night.

Is it cold enough for revenge yet?

[lawlessone2009]

It never leaves. It becomes part of your life and something you are left to deal with.

[lawlessone2009]

What I would say is... Do not seek any form of revenge. It will not work in your favour. The Police will also easily find out you were behind it, they have huge resources and clever tech at their disposal.

[Peter1975]

Gosh, this is an old thread. Welcome back.

Sorry to hear this is still haunting you but it's not uncommon. Most find that it fades but never completely goes away and some people rather sadly seem to choose to make it their whole personality, becoming rather unbearable in the process.

Klingons and fictional Sicilian mafiosi may believe revenge is a dish best served cold but Confucius advised those seeking revenge to start by digging two graves. Many here have stated that the best revenge is a life well lived and I would recommend that option. Perhaps consider some talking therapies.

[Casehardened]

Oh dear, it's quite a few years since I wrote those words: "revenge is a dish best served cold" and I guess I've mellowed/grown older (*delete as appropriate!)

I'd now agree with LL1 and Peter's wise words in that revenge doesn't help; it may satisfy in the short term but the underlying grievance will rumble on.

This isn't the same as completely forgetting about the accusation, I certainly can't, but try to get to a stage where there are long periods of time where those events are not overshadowing the rest of your life.......