Trumped up allegations

[is there justice?]

My husband has been stupid and engaged in a very flirty, kissy, huggy relationship with a member of his staff last year. They put a full stop to it last year. The woman certainly encouraged him but he was an idiot to be flattered and respond. We work together and I did have suspicions and a few arguments with him about it though he denied anything was going on. Sometimes you just know, though.
I warned him he was making a rod for his back and she was manipulating him. Without being mean I couldn't see what her interest in him was as she had a fiancé (although of very dubious character and heavily in debt). We only have a small business, it certainly isn't a goldmine.


She walked out of work because I asked her to make some progress repaying some money she owed. I felt her response was contrived. Later that afternoon she returned with her fiancé who said ‘they were going to close us down and ruin our reputation’ and that Hub had subjected her to a long campaign of sexual harassment and wait to hear from their solicitors. I took this to mean a constructive dismissal case but we had heard nothing.
Last Friday my Hub was arrested and later charged for sexual harassment and 3 counts of sexual assault which he thinks refers to touching her breasts when they have embraced. Her evidence is a supporting statement from her fiancé and her best friend. Really, she waited so long to deal with it? She begged us to employ her fiancé at one point but I refused as I know too much adverse info about him.
Our solicitor says this is the very low level of the scale even if convicted but because hub was her boss, it could be serious and lead to signing the SOR and a conviction, possibly jail but probably not. It will certainly ruin his reputation.
He doesn’t deny that he responded to her advances and flirtiness but he didn’t embrace or kiss her against her will. I have seen her approach hub and touch him in quite an intimate way on the chest on more than one occasion which caused subsequently rows between me and hub. There are pages of other minor things that support hub’s response, photos where she’s posed for him (not sexual but why would she pose at all?). She used to ask her daughter to wait in the back office after school if she was out even if Hub was the only one in. I doubt she’d do that if she thought she was being harassed or assaulted.
Why would she make these FAs? Financial gain will be a big motive, closing us down could lead to more business for her (although they have no money and no experience and will probably go bust anyway) and she may think this makes the restrictive covenant unenforceable.
I am furious with Hub as I feel he has cheated on me but I’m damned if I will let a woman bring these FAs because it undermines those people with genuine cases. Even in my anger I know he hasn’t done anything malicious or unwanted. However he can’t, and won’t, deny they have had some contact.
I’m writing a lengthy statement to the solicitor with lots of examples, emails between them, etc. She left her hub for her fiance and we have a great letter from her fiance's wife about fiance with copies of thousands of pounds worth of debt. If the sol gets enough stuff to cause doubt, especially that we have definitive proof that she has been going to our office out of hours and is opening a new business, is it possible the case will be abandoned by the cps or does it always go to at least the first court hearing? How much doubt is enough doubt?
I’m stressed beyond belief. I’m already on meds for high BP but now it’s soaring again. I can’t sleep more than a couple of hours and hub is worse and keeps saying he should just end it all and that he’s ashamed of what he’s put me through.
Sorry to offload and ramble and I know it's small compared to what some of you have been through.
Thanks for reading

[Don'tbelieveit!]

Hi ITJ

Sorry to read what you are going through. It is and will continue to be a very tough time for both of you, but first and foremost, support your husband as much as you are able to, even though it it painful for you, to get him away from his suicidal thoughts. It will always be seen as an admission of guilt if he does go down that route!

If you have decided that you can help and support him, then try to be strong and get ready for a fight. Don't let this woman ruin your life or your business. She's not worth it but you are worth the truth coming out in the end!

I'm afraid I can't answer your question but can offer you support and a good pair of ears (or eyes) should you ever need them. Take care!

[is there justice?]

Thank you DBI

We are selling the business anyway whatever happens - the other year we employed a thief, now this, and I just won't have employees again. A rival firm is interested in buying our business and will take the staff too apart from us and my son. We will set up a totally different family only business, low key but make a living. Hopefully we will then have more time as a couple. I used to joke the FA was his office wife.

I think hub has learned a lesson the hardest way possible and although I have had doubts and he is a total idiot, I will stick by him as will my son and daughter.

Our sol seems very good and supportive and certainly phoned us a lot in the first week which just about kept us going. We have to wait now until June unless it is dropped before then. We have trawled through emails and notes etc. for anything to help the solicitor as I'm not sure what my son and I say will have much value as we will be seen as biased.

When Hub was arrested my son found the sol and he advised hub to answer 'no comment' to everything. That made me uneasy but I've since been told it's normal.

[myhome]

Hi ITJ - replied to your introduction thread

This sounds a nightmare and complicated....is your solicitor a specialistin defending FA cases? You really need one who is....

Be prepared for the worst rollercoaster ride of emotions you've ever had... The suicidal feelings your hubby has are common for people FA but as DBI said - that will be seen as admission of guilt by everyone and he will never have a chance to defend himself, get the truth heard and rebuild his relationship with you - and she will have won everything and you both will have lost everything......
keep posting and we'll keep helping and supporting all we can...

MH

[lawlessone2009]

Okay... Easy bit first. If his solicitor advised him to state 'no comment' then your hubby was acting on legal advice. That is different from not receiving legal advice and simply stating 'no comment'. It's good that this has happened, if indeed that is what happened.

Selling your business? Have you let the potential buyers know about the potential 'rival' company that's setting up not far from you?

If what you have stated is true and the couple have debts then I really don't feel that they will succeed. Starting a business is extremely difficult and if they are capable of mismanaging their personal money then it won't be long before things go wrong with the business venture.

As for your hubby and suicide. It's one of the first things that flashes through the mind. He could well spend days/weeks/months with it lingering in the background. Keep an eye on him and keep positivity flowing. I would say that 99% of people accused of a sexual crime do not commit suicide but then someone else may say it's 80%, whatever the percentage or figure, ONE person taking their life is one person too many. Make sure it is not your hubby.

False accusations are horrendous and terrifying things to face. My ordeal is long over but I am still dealing with so many issues it's unbelievable. I've had a long time out from here but I've certainly not moved on. It seems that these things last forever and slowly destroy and change parts of you. They really are life changing.

As for the false accusation against your hubby. I can almost clearly see a motive and I can see the falseness. Your hubby has been a little silly and been led on by a woman who's set out to lead him on. She's clearly a twisted animal and it really wouldn't surprise me if she's been trying to manipulate him to extract information or give herself an advantage of sorts. Remember that the 'evidence' gathering does not focus just on your hubby, the Police will (should!!!) do background checks on everyone involved or named. They will follow the info given to them until they reach a logical conclusion.


The prosecution want to be certain that should they take someone to trial then the likelyhood of a conviction is great enough that it is worth pursuing. Last thing they want is to ignore avenues that should've been investigated only for the defence to be prepared enough and able to rip them to shreds. They need to PROVE the case where as the defence merely need to throw doubt. A few paragraphs from you and I doubt that your husband is guilty of anything other than being silly.

[Casehardened]

Last Friday my Hub was arrested and later charged for sexual harassment and 3 counts of sexual assault

Hi,

Just a thought....are you in Scotland? (this question probably being prompted by Lawlessone responding!)

If not, did you actually mean that he was formally charged with the offences, or did you mean he was accused of committing the offences during the interview.....there is a quite a difference!

[is there justice?]

Hi, thanks for your replies.

He has been charged and bailed as the woman has 2 people who say she had told them about it before. Not very credible people but heeding good advice not to reveal too much on here, I won't go into why.
Have found quite a lot of stuff that supports hub but I still worry as it is pretty much his word against hers. Like most people, this is new territory for us and it's hard to put your faith in a legal system if you have no experience of it. Years ago hub did jury service and said he was shocked and disturbed by how most of the jury immediately assumed guilt because the police had charged the defendant.
Our sol has handled sexual cases before but how do I know how good he is?
The company taking over our business will take the actual business and merge it with their own so not directly active where we are. There is not a hope in hell of the new business succeeding without major financial investment.
We both managed to sleep through until 6.30 last night so that's a help.
Thinking of everyone else going through this c*rap.

[Casehardened]

Hi ITJ,

As hubby has been charged I think you must assume that the matter will go to trial (unless the woman admits it didn't happen which seems unlikely)

It is more difficult to change solicitors after charge; I believe a new solicitor has to submit reasons for the change to the LSC to transfer funding so you would have to have cogent grounds for a change. Ask as to which barrister they are likely to use and google for past cases to see how they have done. Obviously if you are paying privately you can swop without problems.

However my view is that as you and hubby are business people, you must be both organised and articulate, and well capable of preparing a defence. The bottom line is that the solicitor will act as a channel between hubby and barrister for the information you provide, advising what is and isn't admissible, and if both of you are proactive in providing witnesses and statements, the whole process will flow smoothly.

As well the statement you are already preparing, consider if there are any character witness you can call on to speak out for hubby.

[is there justice?]

Thank you

I am a bit worried that the original info I put up will make it obvious to any police etc, who it is about. Is there any way it could be shortened/edited?

Hub would largely be ruined either way so there is no risk for the FA especially as I read she can claim compensation either way. Money is what she needs more than anything.

I hope we can rely on some character witnesses (or hope so, people may be reluctant to be involved, I suppose). Hub says he doesn't want to involve others - he's a private person and is quite ashamed even though it was not an affair as such - but hopefully will realise the need to do everything necessary.

We are incredibly lucky that we can afford our own sol although it will probably take the majority of our savings.

[Casehardened]

I am a bit worried that the original info I put up will make it obvious to any police etc, who it is about. Is there any way it could be shortened/edited?

I have removed ages, months, and some detail relating to the business; hopefully this will make the post sufficiently anonymous, but f not I will be pleased to re-edit.

If you can afford to pay privately, the consensus of opinion amongst members who have used him is that Chris Saltrese is one of the best for defending false allegations.

http://www.chrissaltrese.co.uk/index.html

[is there justice?]

Thank you for all your help

[whatsgoingon?]

I hope we can rely on some character witnesses (or hope so, people may be reluctant to be involved, I suppose). Hub says he doesn't want to involve others - he's a private person and is quite ashamed even though it was not an affair as such - but hopefully will realise the need to do everything necessary.

Hello ITJ... welcome to the forum - sorry I'm late! Sorry you're going thorugh this ordeal.

It's completely understandable not to want to tell people, we didn't, my son (who was the person charged) didn't. We did end up telling a few, and you'd be amazed just how sympathetic they were and the incredible testimony his 2 witnesses gave in court regarding his character etc.
People don't necessarily say - 'oh, I think you're great, and this is why' on a daily basis, but I'm sure there's at least one person who does thinks that of your husband and would be prepared to stand up in court for him. So get him to swallow his pride when he's ready - don't broad-cast this /avoid busibodies but I'm sure you'll find it a huge relief to share this with someone you trust.

Good luck

[is there justice?]

Thanks.
Hub says he will ask people if he absolutely has to. What do you do about people who 'don't want to get involved'? There is someone who has commented in the past but says she can't be sure and would rather stay out of it. I like her but I want to shake her though it wouldn't help.

[mumneedinghelp]

I saw your comment about not having faith in the legal system and your husband's experience with jury service. When I sat on a jury it was totally different and I am hoping my son gets a jury like that. We really took it seriously that the prosecution had to prove the defendant was guilty. One of the cases was sexual abuse and we found the defendent not guilty. Most of the jurors were middle aged so I don't know if that made the difference but I am sure most juries don't sit down with the intention of finding the defendant guilty just because they have been charged.

[is there justice?]

Thank you, that gives me some hope. I know I would take it very seriously whatever the alleged offence.