Going through hell this week - fiancé in court being accused of rape !! Help

[Justhavetogetonwithit]

Hi there
First time on the forum and there are some great posts - thought I'd share my experience
My fiancé has been accused of rape and he is in court this week - so by Friday he will either come back home or face prison !! Awful I have been throwing up all week and just can't see a light at the end of the trouble ! Feel for my fiancé but it's difficult for me too - which people don't really think about the partner or wife that's also involved in tis terrible situation !? I decided to "stand by my man" as I know he didn't rape the girl involved ! He went away with a group of people and got drunk and ended up in a hotel room with a colleague of his ! She invited him in and flirted with him all night ( 4 witnesses all wote this in their statement ) he made a stupid mistake but he's no paying for it as the woman (27) has accused him of rape - very difficult as it happened in Scotland so the law and court system is totally different ! Sorry I'm all over the place but my head is fried with it all !! Anyway she had ruined his live and mine - I have had to change jobs ( thankfully i could change! ) but hate it and my fiancé who tried to apply for new jobs got a new job but he didn't get too far as she wrote a letter telling them that he had a court case lurking so they with drew their over !!
He's on day 2 - she's given her statement which was well rehearsed ! She's given 5 different statements which are all different and don't add up and her best friend who was with her on the night has given evidence AGAINST her !! But that doesn't stop the jury from deciding he's guilty !! So Friday is d day - I'm not there as its a closed court but it's been the worst week !! If he gets sentenced he will go to prison for a long time !! How can she stand up there and tell lies and potentially send an innocent mn down ?? Has anyone gone thro this ?? And what happens if he does get sentenced ! God forbid !!! Please help I'm in despair !!

[Cabins_2011]

Its so hard going through the trial process for both the ccused and his/her paryner. you summed it up well as my wife supported me all the way through (i got my NG about 6 weeks ago) but the strain on her was, and still is immense.

Keep strong and best of luck this week.

[lonley place]

Hi & Welcome but sorry you had to find us.
You are reaching the end of your nightmare and have traveled the rocky roller coaster.
Hang on in there and keep strong. Partners are a forgotten group but we are not alone, for the accused,
their family and friends there is nothing, but there is this group and we are always here to offer support.
I too am the wife of a FA man but fortunately we never reached a charge and court,there
are a lot of partners on here who have been through a nightmare court case and I am sure one of them
will be along shortly to offer support.
I wish you the very best of luck and will have my fingers crossed for a positive outcome. LP

[Justhavetogetonwithit]

Thanks for your support

Its so hard going through the trial process for both the ccused and his/her paryner. you summed it up well as my wife supported me all the way through (i got my NG about 6 weeks ago) but the strain on her was, and still is immense.

Keep strong and best of luck this week.

Thank you it's good to talk to someone who has been through it I just can't wait til it's all over and lets hope justice prevails !!!

[Justhavetogetonwithit]

Thank you lonely place

Hi & Welcome but sorry you had to find us.
You are reaching the end of your nightmare and have traveled the rocky roller coaster.
Hang on in there and keep strong. Partners are a forgotten group but we are not alone, for the accused,
their family and friends there is nothing, but there is this group and we are always here to offer support.
I too am the wife of a FA man but fortunately we never reached a charge and court,there
are a lot of partners on here who have been through a nightmare court case and I am sure one of them
will be along shortly to offer support.
I wish you the very best of luck and will have my fingers crossed for a positive outcome. LP

You have summed it up it really is a "lonely place" as I only have one person to talk to as no one knows about our situation !! And I'm sure she doesn't want to listen to me all the time !! Thank you and so glad your husband didn't get charged I hope he will be home on Friday xx thanks

[Don'tbelieveit!]

Hi Proud of you for standing by your man! I am doing so too! It's a truly tough time and being here and getting the support I hav been getting really helps. You know you are not alone and can share the feelings and emotions you are going through. It really does help to be here.

Will keep my fingers crossed for you and please get back to us whenever you need us!

[lonley place]

As I discovered when I found this site...you are no longer in that lonely place
We are here whenever you need us. LP

[Justhavetogetonwithit]

Thank you so much

Hi Proud of you for standing by your man! I am doing so too! It's a truly tough time and being here and getting the support I hav been getting really helps. You know you are not alone and can share the feelings and emotions you are going through. It really does help to be here.

Will keep my fingers crossed for you and please get back to us whenever you need us!

So glad to know I'm not alone just wish I found this forum earlier as its been one long year !! X
Thanks again and I will keep you all posted

[Justhavetogetonwithit]

Thank you

As I discovered when I found this site...you are no longer in that lonely place
We are here whenever you need us. LP

Thanks so much for your support hopefully by this time next week I will be able to offer advice just like all of you ! X

[How did this happen]

Hi
Good luck with the trial

I'm also standing by mine. He was accused and arrested a few weeks ago and we are waiting on whatever decision the police decide to make. He has been accused of rape, I know it's false as I was there so I'm still in shock

The partners of the falsely accused can be the forgotten ones, even by their own partners as they struggle to deal with their own personal hell.... Or at least this is my experience

Here you will find the support and advice that will help you through this

[Psychojock]

Hiya,

I would like to repeat the welcome that you have already received from other members but also,as they are, I'm sorry that you find yourself here. Good on you for standing by your man!! This sort of accusation can break a relationship in a heartbeat so well done!! I have been in your Fiance's position, in fact I only found out today that the case against me was being dropped,(I was also being prosecuted under Scottish Law - a joke if ever there was one!!). The positives that I can see in this is that his accuser has changed her statement a multitude of time and her friend have given evidence against her!

These people that do this have no idea of the heartache that they cause.

Stay strong, keep standing by him, he's going to need it, trust me and I hope everything comes out and he will be found innocent.

Keep us all informed of how he gets on.

Kindest Regards, support and love,
Pyschojock

[Justhavetogetonwithit]

Rocky road !!

Hi & Welcome but sorry you had to find us.
You are reaching the end of your nightmare and have traveled the rocky roller coaster.
Hang on in there and keep strong. Partners are a forgotten group but we are not alone, for the accused,
their family and friends there is nothing, but there is this group and we are always here to offer support.
I too am the wife of a FA man but fortunately we never reached a charge and court,there
are a lot of partners on here who have been through a nightmare court case and I am sure one of them
will be along shortly to offer support.
I wish you the very best of luck and will have my fingers crossed for a positive outcome. LP

Thank you LP will let you know outcome

[Justhavetogetonwithit]

Hiya,

I would like to repeat the welcome that you have already received from other members but also,as they are, I'm sorry that you find yourself here. Good on you for standing by your man!! This sort of accusation can break a relationship in a heartbeat so well done!! I have been in your Fiance's position, in fact I only found out today that the case against me was being dropped,(I was also being prosecuted under Scottish Law - a joke if ever there was one!!). The positives that I can see in this is that his accuser has changed her statement a multitude of time and her friend have given evidence against her!

These people that do this have no idea of the heartache that they cause.

Stay strong, keep standing by him, he's going to need it, trust me and I hope everything comes out and he will be found innocent.

Keep us all informed of how he gets on.

Kindest Regards, support and love,
Pyschojock

Thanks PK will let you know the outcome lets hope it's a positive one - Scottish law so different and hard to understand

[myhome]

Hi and welcome to the forum but sorry you had to find us - we're with you all the rest of the way and thinking of you both and sending hugs galore. Well done you for standing by him - it will make you a stronger couple afterwards.....please come back and post the outcome.... asking to visit you both for strength and justice.....MH

[Rights Fighter]

So Friday is d day - I'm not there as its a closed court but it's been the worst week !!

I very much doubt that it is a closed court - 'Justice' has to be seen to be done which is why there are public galleries in court rooms.

Hope it goes the right way