Advice re: False allegations please??

[Aidy]

Hello, so I am typing this with fear and confusion and just require a little help!
Around 12 years ago, I was just preparing to get married (still happily) to a wonderful woman..then my mum (who I was still living with at the time) informed me that my niece had made some serious sexual allegations about me.....***absolute state of shock***
I couldn't believe what I was hearing, this 12 yr old girl, who I was like a father to (her own was a complete drug addict waste of space etc!) had made such allegations!!
I must point out at this stage, that
(a) her best friend at the time had not long before made similar suggestions over someone in her family (I think??)
(b) it was not suggested I had had sexual intercourse...more I apparantly tried to touch her etc
and (c) I was completely innocent of any such accusations anyway!!
So, after it all kicked off..she said she did not want me charged etc (but obviously never admitted the truth!!)
Some guy came round to interview me (social services maybe??) and said nothing more was happning on the matter!!
Meanwhile, my niece would not have anything to do with me or my wife, if we ever saw her (not much tbh!) she just ignored us and left the house (at my mums e.g)
Anyway, about 3ish years later, my wife and I were at a gig and she is standing next to us (with my sister)...very awkward moment, but she just put her arms round me, crying etc and said she was so sorry for all the **** she had caused me (incredible!!)
She wasnt sure why she did it??
Anyway, long story short, even though it was very strange, she was back in our life (xmas, birthdays etc!!)..never really mentioned again??

So, in the remaining time, she had a little boy (6 now) and I have a wonderful little girl (2)..
All going as well as married life can be..

Until, this morning, got a phone call off my mum (in tears) saying the police had been back to my niece to review the case???!
She apparantly said she can't remember that part of her life and just wants to leave it etc (obviously not admitting the truth!!!!)
My sister then said they have passed it on to Social services??

What the hell is goin on??
After all this time???
I am now worried sick, no idea what this all means??
Any advice would be very grateful..
Ie should I be expecting a visit from the police...or social services??

Sorry for the long-winded story, hope you understand!

Ps just thought id mention, my wife as stuck by me 100% througout the whole of this, as my family as also, my sister (nieces mum obviously) is very close to me and is obviously very distressed, but has always been fine with me and even trusts me with her other kids and grandchild!!!

[myhome]

Hi and welcome but sorry you had to find us.You will get a lot of help, advice and emotional support on here. The link below might explain why this has happened. Keep posting and keep readin threads.....



http://api.viglink.com/api/click?for...13610581691992

[whatsgoingon?]

Hi Aidy, sorry you find yourself on here and I can understand you're being fraught and confused. There's a witch hunt on, that's what's happening. It may well be that this time your neice hasn't had anything to do with it, just a well meaning OIC thinking that it's his duty ( perhaps he's recieved orders) to dig through past 'unsolved' matters.
For whatever reason it's come to the fore, you need to take it seriously. Don't be surprised if you see the police turn up at your doorstep (could be an early morning call) to interview you. You should not speak to them without having a solicitor present.
If you are unlucky enough to be arrested you will be offered the services of the duty solicitor, unless you have your own. I suggest that you contact a solicitor who specialises in these type of allegations (read other people's threads and you'll see how important this is) as soon as you can and ask whether they would be prepared to represent you at the police station (I think most will give you a free initial interview). You can look on the Specialist solicitors thread to see if there is one listed in your area or post a request if there isn't.
If you're arrested, you're also entitled to let someone know where you are. I suggest you take this offer as they then know there's someone looking out for you. If you are in a real state when they arrest you , you are entitled to have another adult with you at the police station and during the interview.
Other members have had their computers taken from them, so it's a good idea to copy and safeguard anything you wish to keep onto another medium.
Have a good look at the 'Stickies' on the site, there's some very useful information.
I really hope this doesn't go any further.
Try to calm your nerves and become pro-active - passive is a no-no in this situation. Come back on this site whenever you need to know more, there's usually someone around to guide you through the next step (if there is one) Good luck

[Casehardened]

Hi,

It's pretty much as Myhome & Whatsgoingon have suggested as to why this has been resurrected just now.

You didn't specifically state it but I'm assuming that the original allegation was taken as far as being reported to the police for it to be on their files; however you weren't cautioned or interviewed? Do you know if your niece was interviewed at that time?

It is likely that the Jimmy Saville situation has resulted in a review of previous cases that have not been proceeded with and, as Whatsgoingon mentioned, it is likely that for the sake of completeness, you will now be asked to put forward any explanations you might have regarding the allegations. I doubt that this will be in the form of a dawn raid and arrest; this is only to preserve the element of surprise and evidence, which patently wouldn't apply in your case, but probably in the form of a 'voluntary' interview under caution. Obviously if you get such an invitation you must take a solicitor along and consider offering any potential motives for the false allegations (for example, as an outsider, I would consider it significant that the allegation was made just as you were going to get married, quite likely that your niece was irrationally jealous of the new woman in your life, especially as she subsequently ignored both of you until she had matured somewhat)

I can't speculate on the SS input as I have no experience of this, but as you now have a daughter, if the police do take it any further, then I fear they will become involved.

[Aidy]

Thanks guys!

Ok, so had a **** nights sleep, and I'm in work today...spewed my guts up in work 1st thing!
I'm a manager and my lads tried to send me home, but just thought best to keep active!
I really do appreciate all the kind words and advice!!!

I wanted to ask if i should try and find out, maybe through my mum, if my niece has the details of the person who interviewed her etc??
And if i should contact them myself?

Cheers

[Boys don't cry]

I wanted to ask if i should try and find out, maybe through my mum, if my niece has the details of the person who interviewed her etc??
And if i should contact them myself?

Cheers

Hello and welcome to the forum Aidy.

Just a little advice:Do not contact contact the police.

It would make the situation more difficult for you and the police may think you are interfering in their investigation.
As suggested previously make sure a solicitor will be present with you in case you are interviewed.

Keep yourself busy and do not stop working,your reaction was normal and caused by stress.
Talk about it to your wife and mother but avoid direct or indirect contact with your niece.

Take care.

[Aidy]

**quick update**

Ok, so after a really tough 2 days (not eating at all, throwing up, depressed etc) i just wanted to post what's happened since i last posted.
Basically, I went to see my mum yesterday (Sun 17th) afternoon, to try and gauge what the score was?
Now I must point out at this stage that my mum was rapped by her own father many many years ago..so understanable this is a very raw topic for her!
She said she was confused and did not know what to believe?
I reasurred her again, that i had not done anything, but just left in the end because she was clearly upset!!
So, last night I was just really down and my wife basically said I need to start fighting my corner etc
Had a reasonable sleep and woke up a little more confident, and knew that I may have a fight on my hands etc
Sent my mum a text saying a love her, but if she has any doubt in me whatsoever, it is best if I don't speak/see her again!
Heartbroken is not the word, but that is how I feel!

Spoke to a lady (very nice and helpful) at Chris Salteese(??) and she was seemed to think that it wont go any futher??
Maybe I'm a pesermist?? But i feel this wont go away that easily??

Thanks for all your support, you really have been a great help xx

[Izzy]

I'm sorry to hear what's happened Aidy.

I think your Mum probably needs a bit of time to deal with what you have told her - it would be a shock for any parent but it's bound to have brought
back bad memories for her too, give her a little bit of time to deal with it all and I'm sure she will support you.

Your wife is right that you need to start fighting your corner and it's difficult to do if you are struggling to cope with it all.
It might be an idea to start with your Doctor - just to help with the initial shock of it all.

[Hol]

Hiya

Hello, so I am typing this with fear and confusion and just require a little help!
Around 12 years ago, I was just preparing to get married (still happily) to a wonderful woman..then my mum (who I was still living with at the time) informed me that my niece had made some serious sexual allegations about me.....***absolute state of shock***
I couldn't believe what I was hearing, this 12 yr old girl, who I was like a father to (her own was a complete drug addict waste of space etc!) had made such allegations!!
I must point out at this stage, that
(a) her best friend at the time had not long before made similar suggestions over someone in her family (I think??)
(b) it was not suggested I had had sexual intercourse...more I apparantly tried to touch her etc
and (c) I was completely innocent of any such accusations anyway!!
So, after it all kicked off..she said she did not want me charged etc (but obviously never admitted the truth!!)
Some guy came round to interview me (social services maybe??) and said nothing more was happning on the matter!!
Meanwhile, my niece would not have anything to do with me or my wife, if we ever saw her (not much tbh!) she just ignored us and left the house (at my mums e.g)
Anyway, about 3ish years later, my wife and I were at a gig and she is standing next to us (with my sister)...very awkward moment, but she just put her arms round me, crying etc and said she was so sorry for all the **** she had caused me (incredible!!)
She wasnt sure why she did it??
Anyway, long story short, even though it was very strange, she was back in our life (xmas, birthdays etc!!)..never really mentioned again??

So, in the remaining time, she had a little boy (6 now) and I have a wonderful little girl (2)..
All going as well as married life can be..

Until, this morning, got a phone call off my mum (in tears) saying the police had been back to my niece to review the case???!
She apparantly said she can't remember that part of her life and just wants to leave it etc (obviously not admitting the truth!!!!)
My sister then said they have passed it on to Social services??

What the hell is goin on??
After all this time???
I am now worried sick, no idea what this all means??
Any advice would be very grateful..
Ie should I be expecting a visit from the police...or social services??

Sorry for the long-winded story, hope you understand!

Ps just thought id mention, my wife as stuck by me 100% througout the whole of this, as my family as also, my sister (nieces mum obviously) is very close to me and is obviously very distressed, but has always been fine with me and even trusts me with her other kids and grandchild!!!

Sorry for what's happening to you. I'm new to the sight myself and everyone's been fantastic. Still working how to reply to different people and follow threads etc. But getting back to your case, I would just sit tight whatever's going to happen will, but the fact is that she publicly apologised to you could be used against her should anything come of it. It's soul destroying I know, but speak out to us all, that's what I've been told. There are a lot of people on here that have given good advice to others. Keep out of her way then she won't have any bullets to fire. I know it's heartbreaking my niece did this to my husband and the trial starts Monday.
Be sting and were all with you.
Hol

[Faith]

Spoke to a lady (very nice and helpful) at Chris Salteese(??) and she was seemed to think that it wont go any futher??

Margaret?

Boys Dont Cry's advice is spot on. Don't get in touch with the police.