Falsely Accused of Rape after 1 Night Stand on Bail for now a year, is this normal?

[Anonamous]

Hi all,

Im not sure how much more of this case I can take as the stress and panic has left me with severe insomnia and mild panic attacks, I would like some assistance on what normally happens on this kind of accusation and why I am being rebailed so often.

To fill you in, this time last year, I had intercourse with a girl I met on a night out. I had spent 2 hours with her outside the nightclub waiting for a taxi, buying her food and then walking her to her friends (as she decided not to take taxi I had booked) this is all in areas well covered by CCTV, including the food shop that has its own CCTV. Upon walking her back to her friends she admitted to me openly that she was bisexual and she was going to her female partner's so I couldnt come in. She began to instigate sexual intercourse with me outside. Following on from this I then walked her back to her partners and we spoke in depth about her possibly getting a job at my company, I took her name and she found me on Facebook to which I messaged her "Hope you are ok, do you still want a job?"

I was falsely accused of rape from this one night stand, I was arrested at my workplace last year around 2 weeks after the the evening of the accusation had occured. I consequently lost my job, became homeless due to my parent's house being searched on 2 seperate occations on the date of my arrest and also lost my then G/F for cheating on her. From a petty crime commited as a teenager, the police had me forensically linked to the female that claimed she had been sexually assaulted after the night out.

My solicitor said almost immediately this is an 'essex rape' and won't reach court, just give an honest statement and I will be fine. The police took her name from me and also my full statement. I was released on bail to return after a month.

However I have not been back to the police station in now a year, as I am rebailed the day of or the day before I am due to the return to the police station. The Police still have my phone, keys and clothes that I was accused of wearing that night.

is this case normal? can I take any positives from my continuing bail circumstances? is a year on bail normal? my next bail date is next week and I am starting to really worry about the prospect of being falsely convicted as I admitted to sexual intercourse and it is now essentially my word vs hers?

Any assistance would be appreciated

thanks

[Faith]

Sadly, these cases are infamously lengthy

You've made a mistake by cheating on your girlfriend, but you have more than proven that. it could be that the time it is taking is due to checking CCTV footage
However, this is not easy for you, and I would advise that you visit your GP for support with your mental wellbeing, if you haven't done so already.

You can not ever take anything for granted and can't be sure of the reasons for rebail but you can take small comfort in that while they don;'t charge you, they don't feel they have sufficient evidence to do so.

It could be they are holding out for someone else to come forward.

I wonder if the lady in question has alleged that you pressured her into sex in exchange for a job in your company.

She may of course have accused you to cover up her own guilt over infidelity against her partner.

What area are you in? A county will do. We may be able to give you the details of a specialist solicitor, which is important in these cases.

[brokenman81]

Your case is like a carbon copy of mine although mine is gonna be concluded soon!

Some say its normal to feel like this, but it ain't normal when all you was have a 1 nite stand!!

To feel like this (I'm not the only one), fills every day with dread, you just want to cry constantly and you feel a shadow of who you use to be!!!

It's so wrong!!!!

[billykickass]

This all seems very similar to my story as well, i totally understand the ups and downs that you are going through. Hang in there bud, you are not alone!

[Boys don't cry]

Welcome to the forum Anonamous.

What you are feeling at the moment is normal,in a word:inexistant.
One year seems to be so long but if next week you still are rebailed I suggest that you have a word with your solicitor to contact the police and tell them that the situation you are living is unfair and they need to take a decision.

Thank you Brokenman and Billy for your support and I hope the best for both of you .

[erin]

1 year that is nothing,u try 2 years like me same **** like you instead the evil ***** came to my house and spent the night and cheated on her boyfriend i was never a cheater.She was friends with some other person i knew.............................................. .......................well the bad news is there is nothing worse you can do is think about how unlucky you are and how could this happen.Beleive me you can cry untill all your hair falls out nobody besides you mum and you will care................ SADLY.........................I can only speak for myself I Spent the night with a psychopath the police told my lawyers it was a VERY weak case against me.My sol says this is going to be easy for him I have spent my WHOLE LIFE SAVINGS I WORKED LIKE A DOG 14 HOUR DAYS in the hot SUN or ICE COLD.............................................. ............yes there were times in the first 6 months I acted like a little teenage girl i Cried daily flirted with the Idea of suicide but of course I would never do it because I deep down knew there was a future for me after this because I was not a rapist,I also stopped giving a **** what anyone thought of me SO here I am today 3 months away from trial and I am a new person I took all the pain and spun it into a pair of balls lol the other thing that has helped me is anti-depressants a lot of people on here are against it but i have to be honest the anti-depressants have helped me that constant pain in your heart that you feel like a knife being twisted around and around the pills took that pain away.............................................. ...............................It will never be ok mate what is happening to you I know in my case the police don't give a damn about the truama my barrister and sol don't give a damn yes they do a job but I look at them as merchant's of misery because I won't have a penny left to my name after this and I never want to go through this again but I think to survive this **** and not die or end up a very young-old man you need to evolve into a posotive person the jury don't want to see a weeping manchild in the courtroom people got sick of me very quickly because i felt sorry for myself but life is not fair.Ride this roller coaster yes YOU ARE SCARED ****LESS AT THE MOMENT.........................YES YOU ARE IN THE WORST PART OF YOUR LIFE........................................BUT BE BRAVE..........................work out,work hard,build your case, try not to drink or take dangerous drugs,don't smoke you body is a temple you must love yourself and when this is all over and the roller coaster ends you may have lost a lot but i can promise you will be stronger then ever before a new man ready to take on the world .NEVER GIVE UP THE STRUGGLE !

[Boys don't cry]

@Erin

No one wants to experience 2 years and I know it is happening to some members.
I lived this and just feel compassion for the falsely accused.

By the way,you made a little mistake in your posts about the trial date.
Previously you said it would be in February and in your last post you mentioned in 3 months which would be
end of January.

I wish you all the best but in court you can't make any mistake.

Thanks for being supportive and take care.

[erin]

my trial is feb 5

[erin]

3 months away give or take few weeks THEN I AM FREE MAN ))

[Boys don't cry]

I spent last Valentine in crown court accused by my ex.

I've been rude,I forgot the

[RFLH]

We're not against anti-depressants - its just taking those that aren't prescribed to you that we are!

Whatever gets you through the day - as long as its legal and not harmful to you!!

[whatsgoingon?]

3 months away give or take few weeks THEN I AM FREE MAN ))

Good attitude Erin! Hoping my boy'll be a free man first! (His trial - a whole week long starts 3rd week of january) Praying for a string of bananas!

[brokenman81]

Mine starts in days few and I am going through a world of emotions!!😱

[lawlessone2009]

I'm counting days until the 22nd of November!

This bail and all the other psychological tricks that are played is simply sick! It really is time that someone somewhere gets the law changed to implement time limits.

Maximum of 110 days on remand and yet if you're bailed it's normally a LOT longer than that! Treated worse than someone who's unfortunate enough to find themselves locked up...

[erin]

Things will never change