please someone help me

[Mark3333]

i was accused of rape quite some time ago i have had my trial middle of last year i have been finding it hard 2 get over i have just been getting on with each day as it comes i have came a long way since last year but still not where i should be i have gd days n bad ones some days im in a gd happy mood n others im a little down n sometimes i just feel lik crying i thought it would be easyer than this i have my wife who i married start of last year n she has stuck by me throught it all now i just keep lying 2 her n she is sick of it n ready for walking i tryed going back 2 work n couldnt cope with it n i have now relised i will never be the person i was wot else can i do 2 help me

[RFLH]

Have you been for any counselling? If not, approach your GP and get a referral.

You may find that posting on here may help - your feelings will be understood by other posters as they have been through the same thing.

[Mark3333]

I have been 2 counciling twice now will try coming on here more often as i aint been on for a while

[RFLH]

at least you'll know that there is usually someone on here to talk to.

[Boys don't cry]

Mark3333.

Sorry to hear about your turmoil but I can confirm that it is normal.
You have been found NOT GUILTY, remember!!!,
you have a wife who cares about you and maybe children.
You are not alone,if it is urgent you can call the samaritans and some members on this forum can understand.

"One day is fine,the next is black".

My only advice is to keep yourself busy and to look after your wife.
She is supporting you without understanding.

Try to relax and maybe you should tell her the truth.
You will feel a lot better and can remind her that you are "NOT GUILTY"

Take care.

[marynarz]

Hi
The best idea is to make you busy. Try to do things you were doing before trial like plying football etc.
Plan your future and stick to it. Support your wife and spend with her any free minute. Take her somwhere etc.
Im fresh cos my case finished previous wendesday, but I know what I should do to make our life better etc. You should realise after everything that life can end any second and that everyone can loose everything just like that, So move on, and make sure that you and your family will have better live than before trial, that will keep you busy for sure

[Boys don't cry]

Hi
The best idea is to make you busy.
You should realise after everything that life can end any second and that everyone can loose everything just like that, So move on, and make sure that you and your family will have better live than before trial, that will keep you busy for sure

You are absolutely spot on Marynarz.

[victoria]

Following trial

I am so sorry that you are finding life difficult following your trial. Please remember that you have been through one of the most traumatic experiences imaginable and in a way it would be strange if you did not suffer some form of 'post traumatic stress'. Our ordeal lasted 21 moths an we endured 2 trials and we both find it hard to put it all behind us. Your head is so full of the trial, the accusation your defense and nothing else it is very difficult to banish all the negativity over night. All I can say is that 9 months on events in real life gradually start to fill your head and although you still have the trial and all that went with it in your head it does gradually move to the back of your mind. The cliche 'time heals' is true although I dont think many people can completely forget the injustice of it all. Please be patient and let time pass and enjoy the simple pleasures. Please don't push your wife away - she probably is having a tough time too. Best wishes.