Husband accused of rape

[Angry and frightened]

Not sure if my last post went through but thanks RF. Do you mean if he is charged, they could make us sell our house?

[Rights Fighter]

No they can't make you sell your house but you may be expected to pay towards the costs unfortunately. If you check on other threads you'll see that people are allowed to pay by installments.....

[Angry and frightened]

Hi everybody.
Have not posted for a while as nothing much has progressed with my husbands case even tho it has now been 4 months. HER life on the other hand is slowly disintegrating! She has been in a wheelchair, now crutches, since jumping/being pushed out of the window, tho she is telling people that she fell down the stairs even tho there are lots of witnesses to the truth. The other Saturday night her husband was taken to hospital after overdosing on his meds and the fire brigade were up here the other Sat morning at 6am, to put out her chip van fire, again waking everybody up. The best news tho is that her husband has now left her as he has had enough of her antics. My prayers must be working! She will now know what it is like to be alone , living next door to me!
She has told 2 of our neighbours that she has dropped the charges against my husband, but I dont believe this, as he has not been charged and, I believe she could not drop the allegations without being charged with PCJ herself. We have heard nothing off the police ourselves, although my son has just said he saw police at her house about an hour ago.
Could he possibly phone the police to find out how the case is progressing, would they tell him? Or would he have to go through his sol, and would he do lt? I do not understand how this dna process works. If they get it back in dribs and drabs, do they gradually build up a picture of what went on [slowly the truth sinks in) or do they have no idea until everything is back, and then they piece it all together? Sorry if that sounds a stupid question!
Hope everybody is doing as well as possible, thinking of you all x

[Pink lady]

Hi

Hi my husband is in the same position I also want to know if we can ask for an update and if so will they tell us this has only been a month however he does not go back for bail until end of December.

[Izzy]

I'm not in your neck of the woods but I found that there was no info. to be had from the police and I did try. It's such a long drawn out process after
the initial chaos that starts it all off.

From reading other members from England's posts it seems to be that your solicitor can enquire on what's happening before the bail date.

[Angry and frightened]

Hi all, thanks for reply.
Yes Izzy, he did ask when last bailed, why it would take so long and was told '' I cannot discuss that with you!'' Arrogance! Has phoned his duty sol, but no answer. I honestly cannot see, if you have not been charged( therefore, technically innocent), the police cannot, at least, keep you updated with what is going on. He is not entitled to legal aid as he has not been charged but is still treated as the guilty party! Are they trying to say, you do not need a solicitor, on legal aid, as you have no charges to answer, but also we will rip your lives apart as we regard you as guilty, and therefore treat you like dirt, just because we can! And you can do NOTHING, unless you are wealthy enough to have private representation!

[Boys don't cry]

Angry and frightened.

Unfortunately the police is not here to protect and serve the falsely accused.
I had exactlly the same answer "I cannot discuss the matter with you" while my head was all over the place.

Please,please,please but nothing,no emotions,like the one who accused me.

He only said:
-"You seem to be a good man!"
and I answered:
- "So why am I here?"

I met my solicitor and barrister only twice in ten months before the trial.
I do accept that they are extremely busy but we expect so much from them while we are desperate for any sign.

The only advice I can give for your partner is to keep busy and try to concentrate on his defence.

(By the way I am happy not to be your enemy)

[Angry and frightened]

Hi Pink Lady, thanks for your reply.
I also dont quite understand what your husband has actually been accused of, but whatever, if you believe in his innocence, then stand by him as im sure you are doing. It is a very long, drawn out process, as Im sure you are finding out. The people on this site are VERY experienced and great at giving help and advice, as most have been there themselves, so know what its like. Keep coming back for help and advice, when you dont know what the hell is happening or what to do next, they will! x

[Izzy]

Hi all, thanks for reply.
Yes Izzy, he did ask when last bailed, why it would take so long and was told '' I cannot discuss that with you!'' Arrogance! Has phoned his duty sol, but no answer. I honestly cannot see, if you have not been charged( therefore, technically innocent), the police cannot, at least, keep you updated with what is going on. He is not entitled to legal aid as he has not been charged but is still treated as the guilty party! Are they trying to say, you do not need a solicitor, on legal aid, as you have no charges to answer, but also we will rip your lives apart as we regard you as guilty, and therefore treat you like dirt, just because we can! And you can do NOTHING, unless you are wealthy enough to have private representation!

It is rubbish I know and I think that is the shock that everyone feels when they find themselves caught up in the system.
The one thing that I will add is that even having private representation doesn't seem to make any difference, we tried it and you are still caught up in the no disclosure/no decision yet circle, waste of time and soul destroying.

It does seem like karma has caught up quickly with your husbands accuser

[Faith]

What is the latest on your case Izzy?
You may send a PM if you wish

[Angry and frightened]

Hi Izzy, its so true, you dont know what its like until you go through it. My family and friends at work say things , like maybe the police will drop the charges, HE HASNT BEEN CHARGED! THEYARE STIL L!"INVESTIGATING"! Im sure they think its just waiting to go to court, they dont realise how long it takes, I
didnt!

[Angry and frightened]

BDC, thanks for your reply, you are such a stalwert on here!We will wait out the police "investigations" and see what is going to happen. What else can we do? Legally, I mean! Cannot say anymore as I am sooo peed off! x

[Boys don't cry]

I don't really want to use the word "wait" because in bail situation it is a synonym of "indefinate".
But you need to try to focus on your family,work,...

As long as he hasn't been charged,he won't know about the CPS and false accuser's statements.
So your solicitor cannot do much as well.

In a way it is good news,so keep faith and keep busy.

[Izzy]

Hi Izzy, its so true, you dont know what its like until you go through it. My family and friends at work say things , like maybe the police will drop the charges, HE HASNT BEEN CHARGED! THEYARE STIL L!"INVESTIGATING"! Im sure they think its just waiting to go to court, they dont realise how long it takes, I
didnt!

I was asked ' hasn't it been dropped yet ? ' quite a few times and it really got to me. People mean well but it's such a horrible
question to answer.

[Angry and frightened]

No, the general public really do not understand about cases like these as the "NFA" and "Not Guilty"Are brushed under the carpet by the media, as being either too hot a potato to handle or not news worthty. Doesnt stop the papers reporting the name of the Fa when they are charged and making their court appearance tho! Even tho the false accuser is not named, and they could quite possibly be the guilty party.