Husband accused of rape

[Rights Fighter]

Saffron you are right to advise caution with what appears to be hopefully news.

A&F, all you can do is to sit tight and wait. Easy for me to say I know but that is all you can do at the moment.

[Angry and frightened]

Thanks to Saffron and RF, yes I now this is only hearsay at mo but, best I can get at mo, always knew the local grapevine would be quicker than the "legal" one. I will sit tight, the only outcome I expected but quicker than I thought- I hope!

[Izzy]

Hi Angry & Frightened,

As said by RF & Saffron I would be cautious about hearsay. I have experienced it as I also stay in a very small place.
Unfortunately with the high of hearing something on the grape vine that gives you hope comes the low when things don't change as you expected them too and it is horrible.

I hope what you have heard is right though.


Take care,

Izzy

[Angry and frightened]

Thanks Izzy, going thru total **** at the moment, regarding my sister putting up my husband. We have decided that if his bail is extended again, he will go to a bail hostel, great British justice, hey?

[Amre]

I really feel for you and your family - this is absolutely train wreck tv. We get a lot of wives and girlfriends on here with that partners have been accused of rape. Generally, the man has had sex with the accuser and she, in turn, accused him of rape. But it seems that you husband didn't even have sex with this "woman" and to me this is an utterly ridiculous state of affairs.
Not much can be done until the DNA is back but there are some steps you can take. Keep a dairy of all this woman antics. Dates and times of when her kids trespass- basically everything she does that impacts you or your family. She sounds like a bucket off crazy and people like this shouldn't be aloud to run amuck with peoples lives. Rest assured, her lies will catch up with her.
Have you thought about moving house? I know that you shouldn't have to but getting away from this woman maybe a smart move in the long term. I'd be worried incase it was your son that got accused next. Madness, total bloodily madness. Lets just hope she gets her "4 bed" house and pisses off away from you.
I just don't understand people like this, and i always found it so hard to believe that a person would destroy another life for money, but it does happen and its sick

[Angry and frightened]

Thanks, Amre. No, it would be hard for us to move as we are buying our house, and I cant see anybody wanting to buy it, really. That is a good idea, the housing association were supposed to be sending me forms to fill out with ti.mes and dates of her antics. They left me a message when I was away ( even though I told them I was going) I phoned when I got back and spoke to a different woman, who wanted to know the details again. When I mentioned that she had falsely accused my husband of raping her, she became decidedly frosty! This is why I wanted to wait until it was all resolved before I contacted them, but this policewoman told me to phone, so I did. She was supposed to get back in touch, but hasnt so far, and I havent even spoken to the woman whose name I was given, yet. Will have to phone again when I am not working. Thank you again

[Angry and frightened]

What do you think?

Hi all. The news is that my husband has had no phone call today, extending his bail date, as he has done before. I suppose they could phone in the morning, tho. We take this to mean he will either be charged tomorrow, or NFA`d. His bail time is 4pm. What Id like to ask is, if poss, could I attend with him? I would also like to know if he IS NFAd, is she still allowed to go around calling him a rapist? Also, how do we find out who the Chief Constable is - would the normal plods know? They dont seem to know much else!

[Casehardened]

If you would like some idea of what is going to happen before you go he could ask his solicitor to phone beforehand to try to find out.

Hoping that it is good news for him......

[Angry and frightened]

Have had some bad news. Police phoned this morning and said my husband is going to be re bailed until December.She said the report had not even been sent to the CPS yet, as they were still waiting for forensics and going through witness reports. That will be 6 months. What witness reports? There was my husband, myself, my son and hers. I know they didnt interview any of the neighbours. What forensics? They didnt take phones, computers or the car. Its not like its a historical case, or a question of consent, he either had sex with her or he never! Surely its not that hard to prove or disprove? Why are they taking so long? He was in tears on the phone this morning saying he couldnt take much more. He cant spend another 3 months at my sisters, so will be in effect homeless. The policewoman said she couldnt go into details with him. He phoned his solicitor and he, of course, wasnt available, but his secretary said she would get him to phone my husband, but he wont. We cant hire a sol until he has been charged, cant afford a private one, so we are stuck. Is there nothing we can do? I just want him home, then they can do what they want!

[Izzy]

I'm sorry A&F, unfortunately as a lot of us have found it is a really slow process from the time that the police finally put the report in to the time it takes
for the CPS to look at it.
Is there anywhere else your husband could stay?

I know it's hard but try and stay strong x

[Angry and frightened]

Thanks, Izzy, all of his family and most of his friends are dead ( not a lucky person, I know)! The thing is, this is the 21st century, surely it does not take 6 months to decide if someone had sex with somebody else the night before! I am thinking of contacting my MP and Chief Constable over the length of time this is taking, also the WPC s attitude on saying to an INNOCENT man- "I cannot reveal any details to you"! This is so wrong, that you cannot have paid for legal representation at this stage. My husband and myself have paid taxes all our lives and are being treated like this.Have found out how to contact our MP, have found C.C s name but only how to make a complaint against the police force as a whole, but that will do for starters. I do not intend to take this **** lying down!

[Angry and frightened]

BTW, same wpc told us bail would be 3 days, then 3 weeks then could be up to 3 months, now 6 months, we do believe she does not have a clue what she is on about! I have learnt more on this forum - perhaps we should direct ALL police here to learn something about the legal process!

[felix]

Am deeply sympatric. We felt the same - 7 months from arrest to end of bail with no charge and no further action.... Horrible and there is nothing you can do - we tried....

[Angry and frightened]

Hi Felix and thanks very much, you are probably right, just feel so impotent and angry on behalf of my husband. Like many others I no longer have any faith in British justice.We were just spending a pleasant afternoon in the park with my 3 little grandaughters, when my husband had a phone call off the police, ruining our trip. She said she had a report that he was driving on our estate( which is against his bail conditions).. He told her that he parked on garages in the next estate, so that I could bring our dogs down for him to walk when I finished work. She said that he was using our estate to turn around in, which he wasnt and he had witnesses to prove this. She then said she might start taking witness statements as the situation was tense- No s... Sherlock! My opinion is if they spent more time sorting out witness statements and dna results, and less time running around after her every 5 minutes, this "tense" situation might get resolved quicker.
On a different note, we have come to an agreement with my sister so that he can stay there. He is on contribution based jsa at the moment. I think we can now be classed as separated (albeit enforced!) so the Government can pay for his board and lodgings there, and maybe backpay it? After all, we have the police as witnesses that he is not living here. Does anyone know if this is possible? Many thanks

[Rights Fighter]

.........................

On a different note, we have come to an agreement with my sister so that he can stay there. He is on contribution based jsa at the moment. I think we can now be classed as separated (albeit enforced!) so the Government can pay for his board and lodgings there, and maybe backpay it? After all, we have the police as witnesses that he is not living here. Does anyone know if this is possible? Many thanks

Not sure about JSA and whether he can claim as a separated person but if he is charged, then unless you are separated (not just by distance) in the accepted sense, then public funding would still, I think take your income and property into account.