Falsely accused of rape by my wife of 12 weeks

[just married]

Chilly comfort, RFLH, but comfort all the same. Thank you. x

[RFLH]

when it has to be done - it has to be done. Hopefully it'll be a smooth, quick and painless one for you.

[just married]

thankyou, RFLH,

unfortunately though, as an imperfect person, a sinner even, I'm rarely in smooth quick and painless mood. Especially if she's footing the bill. I saw my own recommended family lawyer a long time ago, but had yet to meet to draft out a petition. I understand this is the list of 'faults' which makes the other party intolerable.... And if our relationship is so over, and this the last remaining document, I will have nothing but my own way in agreeing to it's wording.

I need to find out so much stuff, but here is not really the place I guess.

[Boys don't cry]

JM

I am please to see you back in the forum but I don't want you to have negative thoughts.
Nobody is perfect and I am sure from the list below that in a way or another we are sometimes slightly all siners .

1 Lust
2 Gluttony
3 Greed
4 Sloth
5 Wrath
6 Envy
7 Pride

Regarding your divorce, I just hope she won't accuse you of other defamatory offences because of her failed attempt for rape.
It would be time and money consuming,trust me...

Take care and I wish you all the best.

Always keep faith and strong.

[just married]

you too, dear BDC, you too.

unfortunately when it comes to these three;

1 Faith
2 Hope
3 Charity

I'm still a bit of a sucker.

I know my small and cute accuser and I still love each other desperately, and for life, but maybe I'm wrong.
I have been wrong before once or twice.

I don't know if love means perhaps how much pain you can tolerate.

Regarding the wording of divorce petitions, (though I know nothing of such things) I insist that the false rape allegation is included in the document. I'll be prepared to use the remainder of my life savings on it.
It's likely this is our last line of communication.

There have been one or two tiny communications. I had the police visit me this morning to take a statement about her phoning me with thanks after her stuff was returned to her a couple of days ago. I hung up at the sound of her voice, (It's been nearly 9 months) but I still reported her call to the police 101 number to have a CAD number issued in the event of further developments. They did check the full story on their computer, and seemed to take it quite seriously that she would contact me.

BDC, is there anywhere on the forum where one could find out anything about how to go back to the start and report her false allegation to the police, and have a subsequent investigation? It seems the obvious way ahead...... So obvious, I wonder how often it happens, after all the bitterness fear and mistrust of the system has damaged the FA victim so severely.......

In my limited dealings with the police, I experienced nothing but a slight suggestion of sympathy and obvious impartiality. Then again, I was NFAd in six weeks..... and the evidence in my favour was kinda glaring.... Some of her messages I'd saved on my phone's inbox were kinda...... compelling....


She needs to be prosecuted to wake her up. She was 39 last year. I am considerably, (well, not that considerably) older.
Neither of us had previously married. We are both youngest children of quite large families. I still have, despite massive problems we had in some parts (perhaps most) of the relationship, faith and hope in the perfection and astonishing success of the remaining parts of the relationship which make it worth fighting (almost) to the death to save. We were just at the beginning..... We still are......

Then again, it was just a whirlwind romance...... just another statistic....... easy to dismiss... just another mistake.... wasn't meant to be...... the easiest thing in the world to give up on...... Not as if it took a huge amount of work to achive such bliss...... Somewhere in my mind during our (4 months) (or 6 or 7 in total before the allegation) of intensity was the thought that nothing worth having has ever been easy to achieve.

Then again, only very old, or very wise folk know so much about life...... Me, I'm still learning.

As for consuming time and money.... in a way, almost anything would be better than this, Then again, the slightest development has me in a flurry of activity. Otherwise I seem to be In a state of slothful almost paralysis..... inactivity personified...... Very hard to find the motivation and discipline some days.

Finally, she's part of me, and here's the reason why. Because I am the best.



PS. Listening to the Dixie Chicks the last few days... LOVE that stuff....

[just married]

PS,

BDC, regarding accusing me of other defamatory offences, she had already, in April, (to my ever - increasing dismay) made rumours about 'domestic abuse' on facebook and such.... The first thing I knew about this was about the time I came out of hospital after some quite scary surgery. The last time I saw her was 3 days before my appointment for the surgery.

The allegation didn't come until 2 weeks after that. I found out about it three weeks after, when I was arrested from home.

I am now deducing that her female friend, with whom she stayed after the last time I saw her, probably, put her up to this in order to qualify her sufficiently to achieve the necessary charitable status for housing and other benefits.......

Then again, I could be wrong........ The truth, I think, maybe has a way of rising to the surface over time......

[Boys don't cry]

Finally, she's part of me, and here's the reason why. Because I am the best.

Excellent quote JM.

If love is measured by the amount of pain you can suffer,I don't ever want to be in love again:It was atrocity.

If you still have the voice messages from your ex,tell your divorce solicitor about them and I the fact you used them for your defence.
Don't forget to mention that she tried to ring you a few days ago and that you reported it to the police.

I am quite confident the reason for you being accused of rape was a way for her to win the divorce battle.

If you want to prosecute her ,I do not have the knowledgenor the remembrance if someone successfully did it.
I wish I could as I believe I would have some evidence but I have been warned that it would be really expensive and unfortunately without a guarantee of the results.

Very hard to find the motivation and discipline some days...
Don't worry,sometimes I can't be bothered as well.

Not ready to make nice:The dixie chicks.

Hopefully 2013 will bring everyone of us happiness.

[just married]

'I'm Not Ready to Make Nice' is on the list I've been playing all day.... 'still mad as hell'.....

Here's the end of my last post i couldn't add because the 20 minute re-edit time was up.....

Another devastating effect of an FA by a woman is the 'If I can't have him, no-one else can' effect..... Maybe too much coffee today has fuelled this observation, but its' terminal iciness is something that encourages my sloth..
The thousand or so miles I walked and ran over the summer stopped around 30th November... it was all in public, but in isolation.... now I'm lacking motivation........ and finding sloth justifiable........

Something always comes around the corner to promote inspiration and activity....

take care, and thank you...

(on behalf of all those you help, too.)

jm

[just married]

Another small update.

I just dug out my old 'evidence' mobile phone from the bedroom drawer today, where it, and its' incriminating text messages from my estranged young wife and accuser have been kept all year.

I needed to transfer my old contact numbers, as the £20 replacement tesco mobile phone I've used since got nicked a few weeks ago.

Turning on the old phone, I found a new text, sent on Friday 28th, an hour before the recent phonecall to my home, the one that caused me to hang up the phone immediately upon hearing her voice, and report the contact to the police on 101 for a CAD No. This phonecall had been, however, prompted by her wanting to thank me for arranging to have her belongings returned to her from storage..... (We've been at a contact stalemate for 9 months following the FA.)

The text reads; 'oh JM, JM, my love, my husband. Thank you so much.------- Email next week.'

after crying for a bit, I called 101 today and got a CHS number to log the incident of the text, and was issued with a CHS Number, to go with my CAD No from Friday.

This has, BDC, promoted at least another flurry of activity, which for that alone is a good thing, as I was really thinking that 1st January would be a convenient time to end it all. Someone has suggested I'm manically depressed, which sounds about right....... (The erratic highs and lows..)

So, do I
1. Text her back, ...'oh false accuser, false accuser, my love, my wife....'

2. Arrange ASAP for Stage Two of the relationship; 'Falling in Love Again'... (Involving falling into each others arms, and making the world go away...)

3. Wait quietly and patiently to see if she gets enough rope to hang herself. (metaphorical english expression.)

I have, since my FA, been obsessed with seeing her charged for perverting the course of justice.
For such a narcissistic pervert, it would seem to me to have such appropriate symmetry.

In my position, what would you do?

There's one detail I never divulged yet, is that not only neither of us married before, but also, neither of us had children before which, during our relationship, was on the cards....Though the mere thought of a woman capable of what she's done to me raising a child terrifies the life out of me. One of the me's.

..... I seem to be back amongst the shattered foundations, the ruins of the basic building blocks of psychology......

How our modern legal system allows this torture to happen by one person's word alone... (egged on, I like to think, by her evil trusted friend.... after all, the 'victim' status would have maybe got her cash, has almost certainly got her housing... and a nice secure future, all kickstarted by the dreadful abuse she suffered... pretty much what the americans call a slam dunk, I think.)

[Rights Fighter]

Another small update.

The text reads; 'oh JM, JM, my love, my husband. Thank you so much.------- Email next week.'

after crying for a bit, I called 101 today and got a CHS number to log the incident of the text, and was issued with a CHS Number, to go with my CAD No from Friday.

This has, BDC, promoted at least another flurry of activity, which for that alone is a good thing, as I was really thinking that 1st January would be a convenient time to end it all. Someone has suggested I'm manically depressed, which sounds about right....... (The erratic highs and lows..)

Perfectly normal and doesn't mean you have manic depression (now known as Bi-Polar)

So, do I
1. Text her back, ...'oh false accuser, false accuser, my love, my wife....'

2. Arrange ASAP for Stage Two of the relationship; 'Falling in Love Again'... (Involving falling into each others arms, and making the world go away...)

No and No

3. Wait quietly and patiently to see if she gets enough rope to hang herself. (metaphorical english expression.)

Yes

In my position, what would you do.

There's one detail I never divulged yet, is that not only neither of us married before, but also, neither of us had children before....Though the mere thought of a woman capable of what she's done raising a child terrifies the life out of me. One of the me's.

What does that have to do with the price of fish?! I do hope you are not seriously considering having this nasty piece of work back in your life and having a child with her. The next allegation could relate to that child if she got pis*ed off with you.

[just married]

Hi RF. Happy New Year. You're a gentleman. lol.

Just whimsically whimsing really..... I know, I know.....

With misunderstanding though.... the whole Romeo and Juliet....

And society...... and the minefield of rape...... law..... I never knew (until now)... sure no one else who's not been touched by this does either..... We just all have our prejudice and hypocrisy.....

And the basic building blocks of psychology......

and the control games people play.....

AND EVEN religion....

Bob Dylan always springs to mind with 'the carpet too is moving under you'...

anyway.... just whimsing...

real nice to hear from you... hoping all's good....

I'm glad that last year is over, to be sure......
x

[Rights Fighter]

Silly sod!

[myhome]

as I was really thinking that 1st January would be a convenient time to end it all.

Hi Jm - as casehardened put in a post to me "suicide is not an option" but a few days later I thought it was, wrote the note, never went through with it, and I have rarely been so relieved about not doing something - if you see what I mean? A work friend pointed out that if I had, everyone would immediately think, "So, she was guilty then." My sister was much more blunt and said, "So I get a phone call from the police - we've just found your sister's body, please would you come and formally identify it - is that what I'm supposed to do?" Then the little part of my brain that is keeping me going started to give me many more reasons why it's not an option - not least because I'm innocent....
I too have tremendous swings of mood - last night's was down so low - other days I have all the confidence that it'll turn out right...

There is so much support on here -it's unbelievable! And it keeps me going - it can do the same for you too....

Be strong

[Izzy]

How our modern legal system allows this torture to happen by one person's word alone

You aren't alone in asking that question JM - I've asked myself that for the last year.

3. Wait quietly and patiently to see if she gets enough rope to hang herself. (metaphorical english expression.)

- Definately!

I have also entered a sloth period, so unlike me but have come to the conclusion it makes me feel worse, so from Monday I am hopefully leaving it.
I also need motivation, any chance of your running post's being resurrected?

[IvorBinWronged]

From the outside...

...It looks like the FB domestic abuse accusations we're not just for getting he rehoused, but maybe a start of a second attack - once you are arrested and out of your house (married quarters), she can enter and don't forget she can have you banned from you coming anywhere near her because she still "will always be believed" afterall the rape allegation was a cry for help because of the "real" abuse that was going on.

Have a think about where she was rehoused - was it dismal? If so, then she's back on the scheming tip.

If you get back with her, even to just talk, then so be it but don't be surprised when you end up in a hostel with her living in your house high-fiving the evil mate for a job well done.

Hey, Happy New Year - you got NFA'd in post number 40 - go join Match and pick a winner.