What now help

[Rachel3333]

Hi my husband was falsely accused of raping his cousin she alleged she was 11-13 years old at the time she can't remember ! It was alleged to have happened 10 years ago and she only came forward in July 2010 he was arrested in sept 2010 charged in jan 2011 and went to trial in July he was aquitted in less than 15 mins by the jury but he is struggling and I dint know what to do to help him anymore he takes medication for the depression but he needs help and I don't know what to do anymore I think the fact she walked away Scott free doesn't help and the police after the trial treat him like he was in fact guilty her story was full of holes she said she was asleep when he did it and he was 13-15 years old and that his 6 year old sister was in bed with her but didn't wake up it's horrific and I just don't knw what to do anymore can anyone suggest support organisations there seems to be hundreds for rape victims but no one for him

[RFLH]

Hi Rachel, sad to see you hear. This is all 'normal' what he's feeling and you're right, more help should be given.

Has he been offered any counselling? If not, tell him to badger his doctor - what he needs to do is talk it out and keep talking.

If he feels up to it, get him to come on here and rant - he's not alone in feeling this way, there are many more who he can 'talk' to.

[Saffron]

Hi Rachel
Like RFLH said, I'm sorry to see you here, but glad you found us.
Has your husband made a formal complaint to the police about these malicious allegations? It might be worth doing - after all, the accuser has committed a crime. She attempted to pervert the course of justice. It is unlikely that the police will arrest her, but if a complaint is made it will show up on her record if she ever decides to try it again.
I would also suggest asking his GP about counselling. It does work for some people, and can be more effective than medication.
It could also be worth speaking to your MP and asking him/her to raise awareness of the damage False Allegations do to those accused.

Your husband has two choices. Either he allows this to ruin his life (and as a by-product, your life too) or he can fight it. For me, the greatest revenge was survival.

I agree with RFLH - your hubby might find it useful to register here and talk to people who have been through similar ordeals.

Welcome

[Rights Fighter]

It sounds as though he has PTSD as opposed to depression and this is what he should be asking his GP to address.

[Rachel3333]

Thanx will speak to him later about registering he has been ti the doctors again today and they have changed his meds I just feel so useless and don't know what to do to help ? But thank u for ur kind words of support

[Rights Fighter]

http://www.trauma999.co.uk/

Based in Swansea but have contacts all over the UK.

[fighter]

Hi Rachel,
My partner's case is the same as yours. The crime was supposed to have happened 14 to 17 years ago. He was arrested last December, charged September this year. It has been a painful 10 months for us and on January the trial will begin. I hope we have the same outcome as you have. The statement against him were conflicting and have many gap He raised the girl like a daughter and was very hurt! For a year now, we are living in a roller coaster of emotions. But looking forward to having this over.

But yes your husband has two choices, to move on or wallow in it as said by Saffron. He shoud be thankful nothing went wrong. He should appreciate what he has now-his freedom, and I do agree, the best revenge is survival and being happy or else that accuser would feel she had given him much suffering for a long time. Please dont let that woman ruin his and your life more. I am not sure I have helped, most probably I need more help than you . Being strong all the time is draining.Anyway, I hope you and your husband can get off this phase soon.

[felix]

Just to let you know. I thought I was a 'bit depressed'. I was diagnosed a few weeks ago with PTSD by the neuropsych who was doing a cognitive assessment after an unrelated? neuro illness. Am waiting for referral......

[RFLH]

good news and bad news - at least once you get the treatment underway you'll slowly begin to feel better.

[Rachel3333]

Thanx for that he has now registered and I am going to get him back to docs for advice PTSD I hope all goes well fighter it is the most soul destroying and demeaning experience being at trial ESP when u know the other party is lying and it's them that get all the help support and sympathy at court it's wrong it should be innocent till proven guilty but it's the other way round