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  • #46
    I'm pleased you went, feeling run down all the time doesn't help - you need to be fighting fit!

    I know its easier said than done - but try to get yourself interested in other things - 24/7 thinking about this will drive you nuts, try to get a walk every day, but most of all look after yourself.
    And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

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    • #47
      Thanks again for the advice - I tried the distraction tactic yesterday by going swimming and ended up nearly fainting!!

      Maybe I should stick to walking. Just about to go and get my boots and my ipod.

      See you later!!

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      • #48
        Sorry to hear u had a blip (and the tonsillitis!) but try not to beat urself about it. You will have bad days, feeling scared etc but it is a scary situation!! Just try to remember the reasons why u were positive before and focus on them to pull u through.

        Swimming sounds good but maybe as ur not eating and sleeping properly the exursion was just a bit too much for ur body, hence the feeling faint. Lots of people on here seem to be recommending walking which sounds like a good idea

        Re gp, can't tell if u went or not but maybe a good idea if u haven't, they may have some Ideas to help without drugs if that's what u want to stay away from.

        Hope the day is better for you

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        • #49
          Im in a similar situation and avoiding drugs as due to my job operating aircraft and weapons any sort of behaviour controlling drugs would make me unfit for work and ultimately more miserable so i have taken to doing as much fun stuff and constructive things i.e. courses and time with the girfriend. Which does help as it takes my mind off it and gives a feeling of normality needless to say though there still are very dark times im stuck in a bit of a rut where i just feel like im going to jail at the mo but hopefully it will pass soon. These are just my thoughts but maybe they might help you a little bit.
          Best regards.

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          • #50
            Hope you had a nice walk luv, I agree with the others distraction is great, i find reading trashy mags helps me ha ha I put off going to the docs for a long time because i was worried they would say i was depressed or something but they were great, she just listened to me, i did keep saying i don't want tablets and i'm not crazy in between my sobs lol but it felt nice just to release some of what i was feeling, i couldn't have done it in front of hubby because i was trying to be strong for him and everyone else. Hubby turned to drink at the very end and that did him no favours at all.......oh bowling was good!! picture peoples heads hee,hee

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            • #51
              Ha Ha thanks for the advice - I like the idea of bowling!!

              Had a great walk today and blasted a few cobwebs away!
              Will definately be doing that a bit more frequently now.

              Just off to a concert now with my beautiful wife. Don't really feel like it but I'm sure I'll enjoy it once I'm there........

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              • #52
                Glad you had a good walk,

                Hope you managed to enjoy the concert

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                • #53
                  Bi-polar

                  Hi everyone,

                  I've just found out that my accuser is bi-polar, on medication and had been drinking at the time.

                  Does anyone know as to what extent this could account for her apparent memory loss and her desire to 'seduce' me?

                  Also could this explain why she is claiming she was asleep at the time - could it be that she has a memory blank and is therefore assuming she must have been asleep? (she wasn't!)

                  I don't really know too much about this so any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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                  • #54
                    Your solicitor will be able to advise on this one - her records could be helpful if she has falsely accused somebody before e(to her therapists for instance).

                    The Crown would say "having a mental health problem doesn't preclude somebody from being raped and in fact could make them more vulnerable to it".

                    They would be right of course.
                    People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                    PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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                    • #55
                      I agree wholeheartedly about the vulnerability issue and that that doesn't preclude someone from being raped.

                      However I didn't know she was bi-polar until yesterday.

                      In terms of memory loss / delusions from mixing medication with prescription drugs and the fact that she instigated it, I wondered if this could explain her behaviour?

                      I'm still trying to understand the whole thing and am exploring every avenue at the moment.

                      As ever your help is greatly appreciated!

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                      • #56
                        The trial that was stopped yesterday (well pretrial as it had not got that far) relates to an accuser who has serious mental health problems although she was never diagnosed. A letter was received from the Crown to say that the matter was not going to proceed.

                        Her mother knows that the girl's father is Schizophrenic and her son also suffers with that - but his is kept under control. Having had sight of some of the medical records/statements it is clear that her testimony would have been unreliable BUT we do not know for sure exactly what caused the trial to be stopped by the Crown but we will find out next week.

                        If it does relate to the complainant's mental health problems this could/might have an effect on your case but it would have to be more than the fact that she has mental health problems or that she is bi-polar. It really depends on what her medical practitioners have said or found.

                        Obviously I cannot go into detail here as this is a public forum but I will PM you if I feel any outcome to the current matter I have been involved with, may assist you. I would need to know more though but we can do that via PM or email later. Please do not post up too much information on here.
                        People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                        PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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                        • #57
                          As ever thanks for your invaluable insight and advice RF!!

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                          • #58
                            All this may of course be immaterial as you could still be NFA'd.
                            People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                            PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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                            • #59
                              Thanks RF!

                              Deep down I know and hope that this may be NFA'd, but like most people who find themselves here I'm scared and find it difficult to get my hopes up!

                              Will try to stay positive

                              Thanks again for the advice.

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                              • #60
                                I'm bi-polar so hopefully i can shed some light on it for you.

                                What you describe can happen, she may well of been experiencing a the manic side of manic depression. However full blown manic is rare, rarer still is to have an episode while being medicated properly. Most manic depressants will have only 2 or three manic episodes in their entire life time. Of course it varies and there are different types of bi-polar. If this woman was in the grasp of a full blown mania, you would defiantly know.

                                In my case Ive only ever had two manic episodes in my life (I've had a few mild ones too). I was being medicated at the time and i couldn't sleep for 3 days and i basically lost my mind. I left my sisters house in my bare feet and i'm told i ran quite a few miles. I had no idea who are where i was. I just kept running, then i thought id murdered someone and ran further, then i thought i was time traveling and the whole world was out to get me. I was screaming, shouting, ranting and raving at thin air. I was rightful hospitalized (once they caught me!) I was in hospital for 3 weeks before i even new who i was.
                                This is an example of what mania does to people. Once my meds kicked in i was ok, and hopefully its my first and last one!

                                In terms of drinking on bi-polar meds i don't know how that would affect her, but id hazard a guess and say very badly. I wont drink, at all, ever and without exception and im irish!. Most people wont drink if even there is a remote chance the drink could trigger mania.
                                Mild mania is very different, and I think that is more likely. People will basically do really stupid stuff experience this form. They can cheat on there spouses, steal, break into epic monologs and will basically look like there on drugs. The can also spend a lot of money very carelessly (just ask my husband about the time i used HIS money to buy a 4 thou Apple mac laptop, and didn't remember about it until it arrived)
                                Last edited by Amre; 6 November 2011, 01:15 AM.
                                Laugh at your problems, everybody else does. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.

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