I have been reading posts from others on this site for a few weeks now for reassurance and guidance and have finally plucked up the courage to tell my story to see if I can get any advice or opinions from others who are currently a similar horrible situation or have been here before.
I was falsely accused of rape by a girl I was working with at a public event about 2 months ago now. The claims are 100% false and we had consensual sex.
I have now experienced the whole range of emotions: confusion, shock, despair, anger, anxiety and frustration.
I was working as a volunteer at this event with a bunch of other people (40+) and met this girl for the first time while working. The first time we met was 2 days before the alleged incident and we hit it off that night. We were drinking with a load of other people and enjoying our time off in the evening. On this first night she was very drunk and we were kissing etc. in view of her friend and she was insistent on coming into my tent when we got back to camp were everyone was based. Her friend was trying to get her to go back to her tent with her (10 yards away) as she knew she had a boyfriend, however the girl was insistent and she came to my tent.
Here we continued kissing and she was force ably trying to have sex with me when I told her that she was too drunk and we should perhaps do it another time when she wasn't so drunk and was sure she wanted to considering she had a boyfriend. So she went back to her tent late that night. We swapped numbers after she left.
The next morning I could hear her and her friends discussing last nights events in her tent in a joking manner. There were also conversations that morning between others about how loud we were at camp and that everyone could hear her friend trying to get her back to her tent. That afternoon I approached her and said I hope she was okay after the night before and we carried on joking as normal etc etc.
The night after, I was out during the event with some other male friends. During the evening I received numerous texts and calls from her saying she wanted to see me and come meet me here etc etc. At one point I had 4 missed calls in a row.
I got a text late that night from her when I was back at camp with a group of people saying she was lost can I come find her. I called her, found out where she was and went to meet her. Once I found her I walked her back to camp where we bumped into a couple of people I was with that night in camp having a smoke. We stayed and chatted for a bit.
I then went to my tent where she then followed me and these guys I am sure saw her follow me into my tent. She asked me for some water so came into my tent. We sat chatting for a bit and she said that her friend (who she was sharing a tent with) had told her that her bed was wet from the rain that day. I told her she could sleep in my tent if she wanted. She then zipped up my tent and promptly came and laid on top of me. One thing led to another and we had fully consensual sex.
Afterwards she asked me for some more water but she had drunk it all so she said she had some in her car (which was parked 2 minutes walk away). She got dressed and went to get her water. By this time it was 5am-ish so completely light outside. I laid back and instantly fell asleep only to wake up at around 9am to my phone alarm and realized she hadn't come back. I sent her a text to see if she was okay and 10 minutes later I had officers at my tent arresting me on an allegation of rape.
This was the most humiliating, confusing and devastating moment of my life....being led through a camp handcuffed and chucked into the back of a police van.
I was then taken to the station were I was held in a cell for about 9 hours, undertook humiliating personal dna checks and interviewed for around 2 hours.
The only part of her lies that I was told were that apparently she scratched my back and bit my neck to try and get away, but I had no marks on my neck and only playful small nail marks on my back which she did by just rubbing her nails under my shirt. The police took photos of the back and the neck to prove their were none or minimal markings. I was also told that she apparently did not scream because she was embarrassed (we were surrounded by tents with friends in, including those we left minutes before). The only thing I can't explain is apparently she had a drop of blood on her tights....but no marks on her body whatsoever. My duty solicitor believes it will be NFA'd but of course he cannot guarantee this!
I have been suspended from my job after I told them what had happened but everyone (including the top bosses) has been 100% behind me and do not believe I could do anything like this and I also have close friends and family completely backing me but this allegation has turned my life upside down.
6 weeks after being arrested I got a call from the DC leading the investigation saying that they were nearing the end of their inquiries, that they had spoken to her friends who had all confirmed that we were 'close' during our time at the festival and said that they will try and get this sorted quickly for me. She then said that they now just needed to speak to any witnesses I would like them to speak to so I gave her names (that were in my statement anyway!).
At this point I was pretty positive I would get a call to say that it was all over, but my bail date fast approached and the day before I got a call to say that they needed to extend it as they still needed to get those statements.
I have now been given a new bail date....in 5 more weeks!!
I am once again at the stage of frustration, anger and despair.
I'm sorry for this being so long winded but I wondered if anyone had any words of advice or just an opinion from their experiences about what they believe will happen in this case.
Thanks for taking the time to read my living nightmare.
I was falsely accused of rape by a girl I was working with at a public event about 2 months ago now. The claims are 100% false and we had consensual sex.
I have now experienced the whole range of emotions: confusion, shock, despair, anger, anxiety and frustration.
I was working as a volunteer at this event with a bunch of other people (40+) and met this girl for the first time while working. The first time we met was 2 days before the alleged incident and we hit it off that night. We were drinking with a load of other people and enjoying our time off in the evening. On this first night she was very drunk and we were kissing etc. in view of her friend and she was insistent on coming into my tent when we got back to camp were everyone was based. Her friend was trying to get her to go back to her tent with her (10 yards away) as she knew she had a boyfriend, however the girl was insistent and she came to my tent.
Here we continued kissing and she was force ably trying to have sex with me when I told her that she was too drunk and we should perhaps do it another time when she wasn't so drunk and was sure she wanted to considering she had a boyfriend. So she went back to her tent late that night. We swapped numbers after she left.
The next morning I could hear her and her friends discussing last nights events in her tent in a joking manner. There were also conversations that morning between others about how loud we were at camp and that everyone could hear her friend trying to get her back to her tent. That afternoon I approached her and said I hope she was okay after the night before and we carried on joking as normal etc etc.
The night after, I was out during the event with some other male friends. During the evening I received numerous texts and calls from her saying she wanted to see me and come meet me here etc etc. At one point I had 4 missed calls in a row.
I got a text late that night from her when I was back at camp with a group of people saying she was lost can I come find her. I called her, found out where she was and went to meet her. Once I found her I walked her back to camp where we bumped into a couple of people I was with that night in camp having a smoke. We stayed and chatted for a bit.
I then went to my tent where she then followed me and these guys I am sure saw her follow me into my tent. She asked me for some water so came into my tent. We sat chatting for a bit and she said that her friend (who she was sharing a tent with) had told her that her bed was wet from the rain that day. I told her she could sleep in my tent if she wanted. She then zipped up my tent and promptly came and laid on top of me. One thing led to another and we had fully consensual sex.
Afterwards she asked me for some more water but she had drunk it all so she said she had some in her car (which was parked 2 minutes walk away). She got dressed and went to get her water. By this time it was 5am-ish so completely light outside. I laid back and instantly fell asleep only to wake up at around 9am to my phone alarm and realized she hadn't come back. I sent her a text to see if she was okay and 10 minutes later I had officers at my tent arresting me on an allegation of rape.
This was the most humiliating, confusing and devastating moment of my life....being led through a camp handcuffed and chucked into the back of a police van.
I was then taken to the station were I was held in a cell for about 9 hours, undertook humiliating personal dna checks and interviewed for around 2 hours.
The only part of her lies that I was told were that apparently she scratched my back and bit my neck to try and get away, but I had no marks on my neck and only playful small nail marks on my back which she did by just rubbing her nails under my shirt. The police took photos of the back and the neck to prove their were none or minimal markings. I was also told that she apparently did not scream because she was embarrassed (we were surrounded by tents with friends in, including those we left minutes before). The only thing I can't explain is apparently she had a drop of blood on her tights....but no marks on her body whatsoever. My duty solicitor believes it will be NFA'd but of course he cannot guarantee this!
I have been suspended from my job after I told them what had happened but everyone (including the top bosses) has been 100% behind me and do not believe I could do anything like this and I also have close friends and family completely backing me but this allegation has turned my life upside down.
6 weeks after being arrested I got a call from the DC leading the investigation saying that they were nearing the end of their inquiries, that they had spoken to her friends who had all confirmed that we were 'close' during our time at the festival and said that they will try and get this sorted quickly for me. She then said that they now just needed to speak to any witnesses I would like them to speak to so I gave her names (that were in my statement anyway!).
At this point I was pretty positive I would get a call to say that it was all over, but my bail date fast approached and the day before I got a call to say that they needed to extend it as they still needed to get those statements.
I have now been given a new bail date....in 5 more weeks!!
I am once again at the stage of frustration, anger and despair.
I'm sorry for this being so long winded but I wondered if anyone had any words of advice or just an opinion from their experiences about what they believe will happen in this case.
Thanks for taking the time to read my living nightmare.
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