need advice please on false allegation

[LFC6198]

About 3 months ago i was acused of rape when the police came to my house i was in germany at the time and spoke to them on the phone i was very cooprative with them and arranged a time when i could go to the police station, i took along my own solicitor with much exsperiance in this, after tellin him the story and been interviewed by the police he was confident it will go no further. since the interview i have been told nothing and it is stressing me out. people in my home town have told me she is doing it for money and that if the police get intouch she will drop charges. i am in the armed forces due to go to afgan my bail is about to run out is it normal for things to go on so long has anybody who has been wrongly accused of rape got any advise for me as it is makin me sick with worry. the only thing im guilty of is cheatin on my partner its something i really regret.Also when i was relased on bail i was never charged is this a good sign?...

[tarzan]

Hello LFC6198,

I sorry that you're in the situation you find yourself in, but welcome. You will find much advice, support and kind people here to help you.

You ask if it is normal for things to take this long and I guess (not really knowing how long you have been on bail for) the short answer to that question is yes! Things really can drag out. I was bailed, then re-bailed and then re-bailed again before I was told no further action would be taken. In total I waited four months (and that's short compared with some) to hear those words - NFA. How long is it now you have been on bail for? Incidentally, being told nothing after the interview is completely normal too. I wasn't even made aware of what was alleged and still, to this day, have no idea what was reported to the police (other than an allegation of rape) - no details whatsoever.

You say that you took along your own solicitor; is this solicitor a specialist (or experienced) in dealing with false accusations of rape? If not, then a simple criminal solicitor will not do. You must enlist the help of those who specialists or are experienced in dealing with false allegations of this nature - I cannot stress that enough. There will be someone along soon who might be able to point you in the right direction should this be the case. Alternatively, you could try FASO (google them) and they will be able to help will this too.

The fact that you haven't been charged yet would suggest that the police did not have enough evidence at the time to charge. They will have bailed you to carry out an investigation. This, however, does not mean that you will not be charged. If you read some of the threads on here some people have no further action taken and others, sadly do get charged after repeated bail dates.

Right now you need to prepare for the long-haul as these things can take time and unfortunately the police won't be looking to prove your innocence but to gather evidence of the alleged offense.

It may be wise to map out a time line of when this is alleged to have taken place, in as much detail as possible; the possible reasons why this girl has made these allegations; what evidence would prove she is lying; why she is lying; witnesses that could be contacted; possible CCTV footage; text messages etc etc - anything that will help clear your name. These may not all be applicable but you get my point. A detailed time-line will help a great deal.

That you've come here is a good thing - there are many people who will advise and support you. I know that you must be sick with worry and that's completely normal too - my time on bail was dark; the worry, the anger, the unknown - it completely changed me and today I'm not the person I was before these allegations were leveled against me. But keep coming back; ask questions, vent off, tell us how your feeling and I promise nothing less than as much support as you need will be available. Do you have support for friends and family? Is this your first bail date approaching? Perhaps, if you'd like to tell us a little more of the situation we could offer more advice, but please do not feel obliged and do beware that the plod look through these fora too so don't give too much away - anonymise everything!

So, that leaves to me say, welcome again and do come back for all the support and advice you need. I'm sure others will be along soon (with far better advice that me!) to help you out.

Hold in there, buddy.

T x.

[RFLH]

Hello LFC6198, thanks for replying Tarzan - mischief managed!!!

[billykickass]

Hi mate
If you read through my posts you will see that our situations are almost too similar! My bail date is also approaching in a few weeks and im bricking it too. So i cant really offer any advice except to say were in this together at the mo and there is perhaps some strength of mind in numbers. I found that telling the guys at work about it and letting them make a bit of a joke of it brought some light to dark times and cheered me up if nothing more. my thoughts to you buddy good luck.

[RFLH]

thanks for your words of support Billy - is really does help others.

[LFC6198]

Hi mate
If you read through my posts you will see that our situations are almost too similar! My bail date is also approaching in a few weeks and im bricking it too. So i cant really offer any advice except to say were in this together at the mo and there is perhaps some strength of mind in numbers. I found that telling the guys at work about it and letting them make a bit of a joke of it brought some light to dark times and cheered me up if nothing more. my thoughts to you buddy good luck.

mate just been havin a read of yours its **** init. i didnt have my clothes taken away the girl involved waited till i was out the country before she reported it she told my mates i did it, the night after at a party. I can only talk to me mum and uncle and told 1 lad at work my problem is i have a Misses and 2 kids keepin that from her is killin me and she has noticd a change in my attitude but is not sure with whats up, i just tell her im worried about afgan. my boss at work has been helpfull and fully wants to protect my family life. The police was very helpfull with me and worked around my timings when i was avalable etc. good luck to you to mate..

[LFC6198]

thanks for the advise

Hi tarzan wow didnt think some one would have the time to write all that so i will start with thanks..im not sure what to say about the situation there are no witnesses no cctv or anything cause we was at her flat. It happened on a friday night and she waited till the monday to report it knowing that i had gone back to germany to work. On the saturday she was tellin my best mates brother at a party that i had raped her. i trid to ring her and txt her the following morning not to tell anyone we had slept together cause i didnt want my wife to find out and that it would destroy my marraige plus she is like my 3rd cousin and my mum and hers are like best friends (not now). Sorry im not very good at writing so i hope it makes sence to you..When my mum told me the police had been i rang them straight away and arranged a date to come back to england and meet them. The first police officer to come arrest me was a DC but it got past on to a WPC my solicetor though this was abit strange. I did the interview answered all the questions my solicetor was pleased in how i answered there questions and thanked them for the questions they asked me, the police also told me everything that she had told them about what had happened. After my interview my solicetor told me with the question they had asked me and the way things went he dont belive things would go any further. He also said this is a very common thing and he has delt with this kind of thing many of times before. I also know him from a previous and he is good.. she told people she was scared to go down stairs incase i was still there yet she had walked me to door and even got my phone for me that i had forgot in the bedroom. She has been tellin people she is doing it for money she told peopl she couldnt sleep but in her police interview she woke in the morning realised what happend and was in bed all weeknd yet she had been to a party on the saturday the list goes on. SORRY ABOUT MY GRAMMER THATS WHY IM IN THE INFANTRY AND NOT A OFFICER LOL.

[tarzan]

Hello again!

Mate, please don't worry about your grammar - I'm not here to critique your English, it makes perfect sense and that's all that maters. And another thing my friend; a man who fights for their country, whatever rank, gets my respect!

Are you friends with any of those she has been telling she is doing it for money? If so, would they not be willing to give a statement to that effect - this is a motive for the false allegation that could be used in your defense (providing this goes to court, which I hope dearly that it doesn't). You could start to make inquiries about it though - it would be a start.

If she told the police that she was in bed all weekend and you know that she was at a party do you not know anyone that would verify that for you i.e. at the party with her and can show that she is lying?

When she reported it, and it being a false accusation, then I assume there is no bruising etc? If so this comes down to a case of your word against hers. I take it also that this is an issue of consent i.e. she saying that she didn't give it and your saying she did?

Where did you meet this girl? Are there any other witnesses that could help you? People the following morning? Was there anyone else in the flat? These could all be used to your advantage in proving your innocence.

You played it pretty much as I did in the interview - I too was accused and just told them how it was - answered all questions and gave as much detail as possible. I believe this helped me, but there have been many reports on here where telling them everything has been a bad thing. It then got twisted and used against them - poor souls. But at the time, to me, it seemed the most sensible thing to do - after all I had done nothing wrong! Did the WPC interview you or the DC? That would seem strange if it was the WPC!

As for telling your wife, well mate, you've been naughty but that does not deserve this allegation to be leveled against you. Have you considered telling your wife? How do you think she would react? You'd be surprised at how this kind of adversity can pull people together. I certainly know that it brought me closer to my family, however, I was not married or had another partner. I guess only you know your wife, and the decision lies with you. I would just hate for her to find out by other means (especially if this girl is your third cousin). It's worth some thought, but ultimately the decision lies with you.

I know that the worry must be getting to you at the moment but hold on to the fact that you know that you are innocent of this crime. Many people on here have been 'no further actioned' but sadly there are some who are charged. When is your bail date?

Anyway mate, keep coming back with questions or for advice or just to talk about how things are going as I know this is a mega-mega tough thing to deal with - a proper rollercoaster of emotions.

T x.

[tarzan]

people in my home town have told me she is doing it for money and that if the police get intouch she will drop charges. .

Just re-reading this and I'm a bit confused by the quote above. What do you mean by if the police get in touch she will drop the charges? Did she not report it to the police originally?

T .

[LFC6198]

Just re-reading this and I'm a bit confused by the quote above. What do you mean by if the police get in touch she will drop the charges? Did she not report it to the police originally?

T .

yeah she did but since she reported it the police have not contacted her and she told people if they do she will drop it..

[tarzan]

This is odd behaviour mate. Almost as if she is afraid of the consequences of her actions if she is caught out!!

[LFC6198]

there was no brusing she told everybody there was blood every where the police told me that she had a few droplets of blood but didnt seem to concerned by it. is it normal they tell you what thy said? they tried to catch me out by twisting things but i always corrected what they had changed i.e so you had sex on the couch no it was in her bedroom. i have wanted to tell my wife but it would kill her been in the army im away from home alot and she is very loyal and deployin in a matter of weks and leavin this on her would be very bad so i have to try keep it from her. I told the police about the party etc they didnt ask for any names or anything. also they mentioned my ex girlfriend who is a evil ***** i think she may have somthing to do with it all... there is so much more i would like to tell you about this. When i said to her dont tell anyone it will damage my marraige and mess my kids lifes she is a mother of 2 who has given her kids away, maybe that has made her think f*ck you. i dont know apparently she has done this before but that what i hav been told not 100% sure. My whole town knows about this not 1 person i know or knows me belives her even her own mum told my friends brother she is lying. I just hope the police belive what i told them.Sorry if this is waffle find it hard to write what im trying to say...

[billykickass]

Mate i would say probably dont tell your misses unless you go to court and if not just see this as a message from above to stop playing around i know its pretty much part of the culture in the army. I wish they told me what my accuser had said i didnt get anything. I too am sposed to be going abroad with work next month and this is causing a right pain for my hierachy with planning etc. I hate this situation wish it would be over but chin up i guess (not good advice i know) but might help to know your not the only one feeling like this.

[Amre]

I can see where billys coming from but I have to disagree. If you don't tell your wife and she finds out from another source she will be wayyyyy more pissed off. What if ur ex tells her? Or the cops call and ur not in? Honesty she will feel like the biggest fool if everyone knows bar her. Own up to the affair, tell her you made a mistake but you didn't hurt anyone. She will find out. It needs to be from you. Women forgive men for affairs and she might well stand by you. if you get done, you will need support.
Instead of following billys advice follow his example. Billy told his mrs and she's standing by him.

[billykickass]

Yep amre is right and i am truly lucky and blessed for that fact. You said your off to afghan soon. Is this a first tour? Although you said your infantry so probably not i know you guys get hit for tours even more than us. No reason really to ask just incase it is i could prob offer you more advice on dealing with being separated over that period if it helps at all.