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Hi all, I found this site searching on Google for help when falsely accused of rape, I would like to tell you my story and hopefully get some advice.
Until recently I was married, and raised my wife's 2 kids with her since the age of 2. My stepdaughter and I have always been close from the very beginning, she chose to call me Dad even though I'm not her biological father. We've always been close, she chose to talk to me when she had problems as she hasn't always got on that well with her mother, who has a temper and a drinking habit.
At the beginning of this year (she's now 15) she hooked up with her first boyfriend. I found out he was smoking cannabis, and had encouraged her to do it. She was found to have joints in her bag at school. Over the space of a few months, she changed completely - she cut her hair, started listening to very dark music and her personality shifted completely. We didn't get on as well any more. She started sneaking off and drinking, and had to be brought home by the police when she was incapable of even speaking on a local front street. I told her I wasn't happy with her seeing this lad, and we argued a lot. At one point she told me if I didn't butt out of her life, she'd ruin mine.
In April, I found out she was smoking again, and we had another argument. The next thing I knew, she went to her mother and told her that we "had been a couple, boyfriend/girlfriend" and planned to move away and marry when she was 16. My marriage to her mother was rocky as hell anyway by this point, and we had already talked about divorce on 3 occasions. Her mother didn't know what to do at first, and we talked about it for 3 days, arguments back and forth. 3 days later, her mother went out to buy her weekly wine supply and left me and my stepdaughter alone in the house, so I thought she must trust me.
When she came home, her mood had changed. Ten minutes later, the police arrived. They arrested me, and said an allegation had been made that "unwanted kissing" had taken place. I'm in my 40s, and I'd never been arrested in my life. I've suffered from sever depression and anxiety for years, and my world collapsed. I was interviewed by the police doctor, then interviewed about the allegation, then bailed at 2 in the morning. I stayed the night at a friend's, but my mental state degenerated the next day and my friend rang the mental health crisis team. I was taken to an acute admission psych ward, and spent the next 5 weeks there with no money and very little help.
I was released as a homeless person, and given use of a temporary flat by the local council, which is where I still am. My phone, laptop and ipod had been seized when I was first arrested, and I was only weeks away from answering bail to find out if they intended to bring charges, then last week happened. The police arrived at my flat last week, to arrest me because a new allegation had been made. Rape. Of my stepdaughter. I've had NO contact at all with any of them since April when I was first arrested. The police said she'd written a letter to her mother stating that one night "somewhere at the end of November or start of December" when her mother was out drinking with her friends, I had sent her younger brothers to bed and had then held her down with one hand over her mouth to stop her screaming, and raped her, taking her virginity. Not only could she not remember the date, but she apparently couldn't remember whether I had supposedly ejaculated or not.
I had to tell the police that not only was the allegation not true, but physically impossible. Back in June last year I became impotent, and my sex drive disappeared. My wife and I had no sexual relationship after that. I was referred by my GP to hospital where I was diagnosed with very low testosterone levels, and placed on a hormone replacement program and given Viagra. None of it worked, and I still couldn't get an erection. I gave the police permission to access my medical records to prove this. I was bailed again with the date now extended until October so the CPS can decide whether to bring charges.
I'm terrified. Scared ****less. There is NO evidence to back up her claim. No bruising was ever reported, no DNA, she can't remember the date. Surely if your own father forcibly took your virginity you'd have the date burned well and truly into your mind? When I was arrested the second time the police interviewed me very quickly, and even drove me back home to my front door afterwards. I realise they have to take all allegations seriously, but surely to God the CPS can't bring a charge with no evidence beyond a very shaky account of what supposedly happened? I'm scared to leave my flat, my health is deteriorating, and I frequently feel suicidal. My wife has filed for divorce, I have no access to my biological 11-year old son, and she gave me nothing but a few bags of clothes after a 12 year marriage. My life is in tatters, and I am so scared
Until recently I was married, and raised my wife's 2 kids with her since the age of 2. My stepdaughter and I have always been close from the very beginning, she chose to call me Dad even though I'm not her biological father. We've always been close, she chose to talk to me when she had problems as she hasn't always got on that well with her mother, who has a temper and a drinking habit.
At the beginning of this year (she's now 15) she hooked up with her first boyfriend. I found out he was smoking cannabis, and had encouraged her to do it. She was found to have joints in her bag at school. Over the space of a few months, she changed completely - she cut her hair, started listening to very dark music and her personality shifted completely. We didn't get on as well any more. She started sneaking off and drinking, and had to be brought home by the police when she was incapable of even speaking on a local front street. I told her I wasn't happy with her seeing this lad, and we argued a lot. At one point she told me if I didn't butt out of her life, she'd ruin mine.
In April, I found out she was smoking again, and we had another argument. The next thing I knew, she went to her mother and told her that we "had been a couple, boyfriend/girlfriend" and planned to move away and marry when she was 16. My marriage to her mother was rocky as hell anyway by this point, and we had already talked about divorce on 3 occasions. Her mother didn't know what to do at first, and we talked about it for 3 days, arguments back and forth. 3 days later, her mother went out to buy her weekly wine supply and left me and my stepdaughter alone in the house, so I thought she must trust me.
When she came home, her mood had changed. Ten minutes later, the police arrived. They arrested me, and said an allegation had been made that "unwanted kissing" had taken place. I'm in my 40s, and I'd never been arrested in my life. I've suffered from sever depression and anxiety for years, and my world collapsed. I was interviewed by the police doctor, then interviewed about the allegation, then bailed at 2 in the morning. I stayed the night at a friend's, but my mental state degenerated the next day and my friend rang the mental health crisis team. I was taken to an acute admission psych ward, and spent the next 5 weeks there with no money and very little help.
I was released as a homeless person, and given use of a temporary flat by the local council, which is where I still am. My phone, laptop and ipod had been seized when I was first arrested, and I was only weeks away from answering bail to find out if they intended to bring charges, then last week happened. The police arrived at my flat last week, to arrest me because a new allegation had been made. Rape. Of my stepdaughter. I've had NO contact at all with any of them since April when I was first arrested. The police said she'd written a letter to her mother stating that one night "somewhere at the end of November or start of December" when her mother was out drinking with her friends, I had sent her younger brothers to bed and had then held her down with one hand over her mouth to stop her screaming, and raped her, taking her virginity. Not only could she not remember the date, but she apparently couldn't remember whether I had supposedly ejaculated or not.
I had to tell the police that not only was the allegation not true, but physically impossible. Back in June last year I became impotent, and my sex drive disappeared. My wife and I had no sexual relationship after that. I was referred by my GP to hospital where I was diagnosed with very low testosterone levels, and placed on a hormone replacement program and given Viagra. None of it worked, and I still couldn't get an erection. I gave the police permission to access my medical records to prove this. I was bailed again with the date now extended until October so the CPS can decide whether to bring charges.
I'm terrified. Scared ****less. There is NO evidence to back up her claim. No bruising was ever reported, no DNA, she can't remember the date. Surely if your own father forcibly took your virginity you'd have the date burned well and truly into your mind? When I was arrested the second time the police interviewed me very quickly, and even drove me back home to my front door afterwards. I realise they have to take all allegations seriously, but surely to God the CPS can't bring a charge with no evidence beyond a very shaky account of what supposedly happened? I'm scared to leave my flat, my health is deteriorating, and I frequently feel suicidal. My wife has filed for divorce, I have no access to my biological 11-year old son, and she gave me nothing but a few bags of clothes after a 12 year marriage. My life is in tatters, and I am so scared
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