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  • She's quite right, it is normal to experience these whirlwind emotions/symptoms of depression. I'm glad you're taking steps to manage it.
    May not be as easy as just being happy when the trial is over. There is quite a long recovery process but you'll get there
    "Be sure your sin will find you out"

    Numbers 32:23

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    • Hi Wunderland.

      Well yes i totally understand what you say especially with the ups and downs and i would sell my soul to cast a magic wand and make it better but that aint gonna happen so i can only offer you the course that i have taken and seems to be working, didnt happen straight away but im getting there and its essentially, just get on with life be as normal as you can (also advice from Tania Griffths and she knows what shes talking about).

      I do all the things i did before: i go out drinking and be outrageous, sometimes i stay in and drink (dont worry its not all boozing), im into some hairbrained adrenaline sports which i still do, sometimes i wonder round the house taliking to the cats and answering for them (admit it everyone does that!). Sometimes i come in from a run and force my girlfriend to hug my stinky sweaty self.
      Probably seems like a random list of things but what im saying is get back to what makes you, you otherwise you will just be a product of something **** that happened to you once.
      Go see your friends or ask them to come see you tell them everyhting i garuantee they will be on your side and make you feel better even if its just for a short while.
      Finally if you can find some macabre humour in it all and laugh a little then take it, hey its a bit dark probably sick, but laughing is always better than crying! (just dont do it in court).

      Chin up a little bit your breathing free air right now so breath it in deep.

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      • well said Billy - don't let normal (?!) life stop or the accuser wins - you can bet they're not sat at home worrying.
        And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

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        • Brilliant post Billy!

          And, yes, I do answer for my cats!
          "Be sure your sin will find you out"

          Numbers 32:23

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          • I speak to my dog she's the only girl i can fully count on right now :P

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            • I speak to the only person I trust: Myself! (So sad.)

              Wunderland I feel sorry for you but I understand what you are living.
              I remember a few weeks ago you couldn't wait for the trial and felt confident and now...

              But don't worry this is normal.One day you will be fine, the next...
              From your posts you seem to be an intelligent man so I am sure you will be OK.

              Talk to your friends and family as much as you can even if they don't realise (and will never) what you are going through.

              Every single day I wonder why I am still alive and why should I ?

              But I want to fight because I have a 10 years old son I haven't seen since last year and she wanted me dead.

              You managed to have dates so you must keep the faith,when you will be "not guilty" you will be after a while back to normal.

              My "ex" wife destroyed three families in one go,just for money.

              Anyway, I wish you all the best wunderland and always believe,it will save you.
              Non,je ne regrette rien.

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              • Billy,from which sport do you get your adrenaline from???

                Gary Connery?
                Last edited by Boys don't cry; 10 June 2012, 06:06 PM.
                Non,je ne regrette rien.

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                • Hey BDC a few really, im into flying and paragliding also do a lot of mountainbiking and surfing.

                  I have a question. The evil wench's barrister applied for her to give evidence from behind screens (this is fairly normal i think) but will the jury get to see her?

                  I only ask as to without blowing my own trumpet too much if they see her and me they will prob think why would i need to do that.

                  Also she has recently got a tatoo on her face (classy hey) and i know that means nothing really but jury members may start to make conclusions in their heads about what she is really like.

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                  • She won't be able to be seen behind the screen but this is completely normal and the judge will direct the jury not to let this sway them as it is the norm in trials of this nature.
                    "Be sure your sin will find you out"

                    Numbers 32:23

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                    • Billy

                      http://www.cps.gov.uk/legal/s_to_u/special_measures/

                      Sorry Faith but I am nearly sure that they can.
                      I remember my barrister asked her a question that she didn't really want to admit.
                      She stayed quiet for a moment,the judge was looking at her waiting for the response.
                      My barrister who was around 5 meters from me on the right could as well see her and the jury was facing her,
                      so I suppose that they could.
                      I might be wrong but I am conviced that it was the case.
                      Just trying to help
                      (This screen was blue ,in 3 parts and could be folded).
                      Last edited by Boys don't cry; 15 June 2012, 01:17 PM.
                      Non,je ne regrette rien.

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                      • Sorry I misread the question, thanks for that BDC

                        Yes she can be seen by the jury, but not by the defendent or the gallery is my understanding.
                        "Be sure your sin will find you out"

                        Numbers 32:23

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                        • I am almost certain that the screen will hide her from the public gallery and the dock. However the jury should be able to see her. In our case, we had to clear the public gallery to allow her to walk to the witness box, which was shrouded in screens. However, the jury and both counsel (CPS and Def) were allowed to see her. So much relies on body language, it is imperative that the jury can see her while she is giving evidence.
                          Screens are quite normal in these sorts of cases. The judge MUST direct the jury as such, and the judge MUST instruct the jurors not to draw any inference from the screens.
                          In our case the judge explained to the jurors that screens were being used simple because the complainant did not want to be identified. However, giving evidence from behind a screen will automatically give the witness "Victim Status" in the eyes of the jury.

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                          • @Faith and Saffron:

                            Perfect!
                            Non,je ne regrette rien.

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                            • Originally posted by billykickass View Post
                              I only ask as to without blowing my own trumpet too much if they see her and me they will prob think why would i need to do that.

                              Also she has recently got a tatoo on her face (classy hey) and i know that means nothing really but jury members may start to make conclusions in their heads about what she is really like.


                              Not nice Billy.

                              Juries take no notice of how handsome the defendant is (or thinks he is) or how ugly the complainant is (in the mind of the defendant that is - beauty is in the eye of the beholder).

                              If you big yourself up in that manner in front of the jury they will not like you for it.

                              Getting a tattoo on the face could be construed by the Crown as a wish to make herself as unattractive as possible so she doesn't get raped again.

                              Take nothing for granted.
                              People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                              PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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                              • Sorry RF didn't mean to come across like that it was just something we were talking about at work and I was wondering that's all.
                                Your absolutely right in all that you say.

                                In a sort of related funny story, I had a slight mishap whilst cutting my own hair the other day and despite the obvious mickey taking I still woke up with the most beautiful girl in all the land so I guess beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder, why she sticks with me will always be a mystery.

                                Moral of story... Don't cut your own hair to save £7.

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