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  • #1

    Not coping well today

    Hi all
    I having a very bad day
    I don't even know why I'm writing on here my wife said it might help.
    I can't really see the screen properly for crying.
    Why is this happening to me. My life is totally ruined because of this allegation and I can't take it anymore. I'm terrified of court and I haven't even been charged yet. If I get charged life will get even worse. I've lost my job because the accuser works there and so I'm not distracted from all this. I loved my work sounds crazy to most people but I really did I'd actually be excited on a Sunday evening about going unto work Monday morning! I so angry she has taken that from me. My lovely wife is so good about all this especially as I did betray her trust with this girl, I should be supporting my wife but I'm so depressed she is having to try and support me instead. Sorry babe, I truly am. I guess only people on this web site will have the faintest idea what I'm going through. Only 14 days till I find out if I'm going to be charged and each day closer is getting harder. Ive been told there wont be any further re bails this time I will actually get an answer. I'm ranting on now I know so I will sign off. I hope you all are having a positive day today and hope we all get the NFA we deserve. I've finally stopped crying so I guess writing has helped a bit.
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  • #2
    Keep writing Raptorace - it does help. Please tell your wife that if she needs to vent that this is a good place to do it.

    I know that its easier said than done - but try and make time to go out for a walk or drive out - anything - make the most of the sun whilst its out. I know only too well that this takes your life over 24/7, but give yourselves a break.

    Give your wife a big hug, she sounds like a wonderful lady.
    And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

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    • #3
      Hi Raptorace,

      I know how you are feeling as I am in the exact same boat.

      Some days I just don't want to get out of bed and the gut wrenching feeling as I wake from a dream where I have no worries is soul destroying. I wouldn’t be lying if I said some days I wish it to all be over, not to wake up and prevent my family and friends suffer anymore of this nightmare. The thought of going to prison physically makes me sick and having people check up on me for the rest of my life is harrowing.

      I understand the fears in your head all to well, your wife is a strong woman and who obviously loves you so very much. You both need to be strong for each other at this time. I feel horrible for what I have done to my Girlfriend for betraying her trust and putting her through all this pain, she could have easily walked away and washed her hands of me but she has stayed with me. For 3 years we have had the best life I could have wished for and she demands no matter what happens be it 5 years...10 years we will have our lives together again. That keeps me going in this difficult time.

      We have to keep on going as one day this will all be over no matter what happens, you as a person know the truth and can take something from that. I try to think about the people less well off than myself who have and still are suffering horrific things in the world.

      Be strong my friend and know you are not alone in this and please try and take something from that.

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      • #4
        Hang on in there. It's hard, I know it's hard.

        You mention your wife, your lovely wife who has stood by you through this. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but you owe it to her to be strong, and you can be strong. Be strong for the people you love.

        If you are charged yes it will be awful, but in a way at least then you can start fighting. A solicitor will not be able to do much until (if) you are charged, so if the worst does happen at least you can start doing something. Cold comfort I know, but you have to hang on to the positives.

        I echo what RFLH said. Your wife could gain a great deal of support here. I for one have ben in the same situation as she is now.

        Hugs

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        • #5
          Thanks people much appreciated

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          • #6
            Hang on in there.Its perfectly normal to feel how you do. Every emotion will surface at some point, for both of you.
            Keep sharing with each other , even if its negative and you dont want to bring her down.
            This site will be a God send for you both.I only wish we had found it earlier.Everyone has been there and got the tee-shirt in some shape or form and nothing you can say wont be understood.Some people are logical some are just there so share and know what you are going through.
            keep battling on and loving each other .take care

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            • #7
              Hi Letty,
              Are you as ok as you can be?

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              • #8
                hi verity,
                I tried to message you. I'm getting by as best I can thanks.

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                • #9
                  coping

                  i am fully aware of what you guys are going through, i am still waiting and i think within 2 weeks i will find out my results.... its not easy there are days i just don't want to get out of bed as well...

                  but hang in there, we must continue to fight to the end... all my friends say u will be fine and i just worry too much... my lawyer says i am my own biggest enemy... i think there are some truth to it

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