Help me! Falsely Accused of Rape!

[witsend]

Are you off to GP? I truly think you need to do this, it's not a sign of weakness, in fact it takes a lot of strength. Another person on board to help and support you is a good thing. I know it's tempting to keep ringing the sol but as somebody else has said when they know something you will. We all know that the waiting is horrendous but remember you ARE NOT ALONE, you've only got to read some of the other posts to see that.

[OldJoe]

I won't, I won't
This is horrid, this is the worst thing thats ever happened to me, thank you so so much for all your support so far, hopefully this will be over sooner rather than later.
I'm so anxious all the time.

I can't live like this.
nothing on TV I find interesting, I can't play call of duty without constantly thinking about this. Its killing me, the Dr's are shut at 1 today and there is no way I can get there before 1, as I am relying on a lift from my sister - in - law.
I feel so ****, I just want to die. I want all this to go away, I can't stand it anymore.

the worst thing is I wasn't even going to go out that night that this alleged rape occurred. I was going to go to my on - off girlfriends at the time and take her some Lemsip cos she was ill, I wish so much I had done that instead of staying out, then I would not be in this f'd up situation. I hate this I can't go on anymore, I'm so sorry, your probably all sick of me rambling on, on here about how depressed I feel.

[Shatteredhusband]

Dont't worry about venting on the forum. It is a good place to pour out your feelings. As you know most people here understand as they have personal experience of how difficult this is.

Perhaps you should book an appointment at the GP for tomorrow. I know you don't feel it but you are coping well with this terrible trauma. You have made good progress over the last few days.

Have you tried reading other people's threads on the forum? I think when you start you may see how many positives your case has. It will also pass the time and provide lots of useful advice and information.

We all feel the same, if only I hadn't done this or that. If only I had realised what she would be capable of. I am guilty of this a lot myself. But the fact remains that you are innocent, you did nothing wrong and that even if you had made different choices, you could be in a worse position. So try not to dwell on things, more important that you focus on moving forward.

Someone on the forum once gave a Winston Churchill quotation which I really liked.

"when you are going through hell, you just have to keep on going".

To me it meant just get up every morning and put one foot in front of the other until this nightmare is over. If you do this, you will get through it and be a lot wiser and stronger.

[OldJoe]

can you give me some links to the other stories?
I can't find any, thank you.

[Darktimes]

Hi
Oldjoe
glad to ehar your doing better mate

yea I thought Playing games would help but they dont take your mind of things at all!

Try reading my thread The Worst New Year Ever

Hope Everythings going ok

[Shatteredhusband]

Joe

http://www.daftmoo.org.uk/mooforum/f...ccused-of-rape

The link takes you to home page for part of the forum. The posts are in chronological order with the most recent first.

Just click on one and start reading.

When you find one similar to your situation, at the very bottom of the thread you are reading, you should find some similar threads. Try using these to explore. Some of the older stories have some great advice and more importantly the old ones give the whole story including whether NFA'd etc.

Any other problems just ask.

[Shatteredhusband]

You can also do a search using the search box to find a thread which deals with something you are specifically interested in.

Good luck.

[OldJoe]

I'm praying each day she will drop these allegations or i'll get an NFA call.

[Shatteredhusband]

Joe,

You need to pace yourself as this will take some weeks.

Even if she withdraws her allegation, the investigation will continue as people retract even true allegations for a variety of reasons. So the police will finish the investigation.

Hope you found some helpful information from the other threads. I found them so useful and still read some of them if new questions spring to my mind.

Hope you got a chance to get out today.

Best wishes
SH

[OldJoe]

I'm going to the cinemas with my brother later tonight.
I just want this to be over, each day is getting easier, then harder, then easier.
Its destroying my character and who I am.

I don't think I can hang on for another 2-3 weeks.


I just want it all to go away. I'm an innocent man, I have never hurt a single soul in my life, I have ALWAYS gone out of my way to make sure other people are happy. Just pray this doesn't destroy me completely. Please.

[Saffron]

Oldjoe
I'm sorry, but you have GOT to hang on for at least another couple of weeks. As you know, cases like this take weeks, even months to get to a conclusion.
Look how far you have come! A few days ago you couldn't talk to your family about this; now they are truly informed and on your side. You have spoken to a solicitor who said positive things.
Yes, you are innocent, but that doesn't make the accusation just go away. You need to pick yourself up and say "I will NOT be beaten". And make sure you are NOT beaten. Yes it's unfair; yes it shouldn't happen; yes it is soul-destroying. But it has happened to you and you've got to do something about it.

This may sound harsh, but as I see it you have two choices. You can either let this consume you and drown you in a lake of self-pity, or you can FIGHT it. And part of FIGHTING it is to sort your head out and get your metaphorical boxing gloves on. Stop worrying about what might happen and start preparing for what could happen.

As I said before, we are all here for you. We all know what you are going through. Be kind to yourself, and for goodness sake please look at the positives.

[Shatteredhusband]

Enjoy the cinema. That should take your mind off things.

This will not destroy you. As I have said, this will make you stronger. You can get through this and you will.

[OldJoe]

Thank you for your supportive words,
I keep thinking about how ridiculous this is and how its blatantly obvious it is that I am innocent, then I think what if? What if I end up in prison? what if I'm wrongly convicted? whats going to happen to me? how long am I going to be in prison?
what if I get killed in prison? lol! I know it sounds ridiculous, but my heads a mess!!!

[Darktimes]

Oldjoe been there done that i bet you've looked online at all the cases and what the conviction rate is etc etc!

DON'T this just fuels the fire of doubt running through your brain mate!

it does get easier! just carry on living the life u lead before this happened and i agree with saffron it HAS happened you need to hit this on the head and realise your innocent and you cannot let this woman win!

[witsend]

OLDJOE, wise words from other members So go out and enjoy the film!!!