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accused of sexual assault (I am not guilty!)

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  • #16
    They are not all bad! My husband's GP was very sympathetic....He was sent to a counsellor and given anti-depressants. (I hid the anti-depressants after he threatened to swallow the lot in a suicide bid, but that's another story)
    When my husband was sent to prison I really struggled to cope, and requested an emergency appointment with my doctor. She referred me to a specialist counselling service, which was great.
    I can understand your reluctance, but believe me, it's definitely worth doing.

    Stay strong.

    Saff.

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    • #17
      thanks.

      I dont want to go to prison and hope I dont. the offence they said is very minor and should pass the prison.

      but yes, i understand.

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      • #18
        Rights Figher, I hope your move is going well and smooth.

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        • #19
          saw the solicitor yesterday.
          she said it would be a tragedy if I got convicted.

          she also said there were a couple of points that didnt make sense. apperently it was on the lines of that it wouldnt make sense on why I would be groping her breasts and rubbing her sides? What is that? no idea.

          but the more I think about the relationship as a whole, even though it was genuinly great until people interfered, it was about money as I bailed her out for an eviction and was helping her with other things too.

          why would she lie of such an allegation? Maybe because she was scared, her past (we talked about that before and ive always supported and comforted her and she knows im not a threat or anything), took advantage of the situation as a form of revenge or something as we were having difficult times (a minor dispute blown out of propertion), and because friends are worth more than a genuine decent relationship.

          her friends probably telling her to "get rid" of me, due to my now ex telling them only of the small bad times, overexaggerating, and never talking about the great times.

          could also be due to misunderstanding, as she has done that recently, and overreacting. having pressure from other sources/people.

          so scared.


          I did see the GP and she was understanding, gave me anti depressants and is trying to arrange a councillor to see me.

          but still, how can I proove that I never touched her like that at all? so difficult. no one else saw but only one witness heard "get off"... but that could be anything.

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          • #20
            Well done on taking positive steps. I hope your GP can get you in front of a counsellor as soon as possible.
            It's good to hear that your sol seems to be positive too. Hang on there! We are all here to support you.

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            • #21
              thank-you.

              im just so low down still naturally because i wonder why all this is happening and what type she has turned into and the things we had together.

              i just dont know how to proove my innocence in court. That is the big thing.

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              • #22
                I am torn between pleading guilty at the commital, or not.

                I am not guilty but have no evidence to proove that. same goes for guilty but she only has a statement which to be fair, isnt enough I would have thought.

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                • #23
                  If you are not guilty then plead that way. If you agree to guilty to get it over and done with, then you will appear on the register as well as being forever known as a sex offender.

                  If you have supported this fremale in the past financially, then you open the door for her to collect a few thousand in 'compensation' falsely.
                  And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the world round .... and laughed and laughed and laughed ..

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                  • #24
                    but if found guilty at the crown court, penalty would be harsher they say.

                    thing is, how can I prove my innocence? I mean, i have some things to prove that she was being all over the place, being confused etc... etc... and messing me around, taking advantage of me when i was trying to (or though I was) help her, but dont think that will stand up in court.

                    her past also is a little "iffy". but I gave the benefit of the doubt.

                    she was also confused, hurt, angry as was I and upset too, and knows it would hurt me more so she could feel better about herself especially under her friends and the things they fed into her.

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                    • #25
                      I think in these situations you have to decide between what might make life easier for you, and what is right. My husband pleaded not guilty because that is what he was, even though we know that if he had pleaded guilty he probably would not have gone to jail.

                      You have to place a certain amount of trust in the judicial system, because all else is chaos.

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                      • #26
                        indeed. very true.

                        someone said to me that the prosecutor has to find out or make me guilty and needs to proove i am guilty.... but i am not.

                        i miss her and somewhat love her. just wonder if she feels the same but doubt it the way she has been and her interfering friends.

                        oh i dunno. im so scared

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                        • #27
                          I know of a young man who was told by his barrister to plea bargain (admit "guilt" for some of it).

                          He was told he would get a short sentence if he did that as he would certainly be convicted.

                          the young man continued to plead not guilty and was FOUND not guilty by a jury a couple of months back.

                          Had he taken his barrister's "advice" and pleaded guilty he would be sitting in prison right now with no chance of appealing the conviction.

                          How you plead is between your God and your conscience. If you are not guilty - can you lie and say that you are?
                          People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                          PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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                          • #28
                            welcome back. hope the move went well

                            i know what you are saying. I am not guilty.
                            but I also believe that I guess, the prosecutor must find me guilty in some way?
                            further more, i have some emails where she states she loves me, and wants to meet etc... etc... then turning 180 on the day.

                            but no idea if that will hold up in court for "sexual assault"
                            Last edited by firehawk; 13 September 2009, 07:23 PM.

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                            • #29
                              The prosecutor doesn't find you guilty or not guilty - the jury does.

                              You should use that evidence especially if she sent them after the alleged assault.

                              The move went as well as it could thanks - but it would be good if the removal men came to remove the boxes and wrapping paper as it's been more than three weeks now and it's still here.
                              People Appealing Convictions of Sexual Offences ~http://www.pacso.co.uk

                              PAFAA details ~ https://pacso.co.uk/pafaa-people-aga...ions-of-abuse/

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                              • #30
                                yes I understand.

                                the specific emails were sent in that week, especially a day before.

                                there were text messages sent back and forth in that week of negitivity, but I deleted them as I was naturally upset/angered.

                                just dont know if all this will be in my favour or not. I also gave a copy of my bank statement to my solicitor who I saw once (but had to pay for it) and she said it would be a tragedy if I got convicted, but wants to try and see what she can do in terms of pushing it for the financial reasons, as my now ex was kind of taking advantage of that.

                                on that same week we also spoke on the phone, a little tension but either way, she said things like she cannot imagine me not being in her life, she wants me, loves me etc... etc....

                                how to get out of this alive and innocent, goodness knows.

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