Son falsely accused and charged with historic rapes by his ex

[myfamilyisinamess]

Can anyone give us some advice. My son has been accused and charged with several historic sexual assault and rapes by his ex. She didn't want him to have kids on xmas day so she had him charged with sexual assault on xmas morning, then 2 months later he gets charged with historic rapes. Solicitor waiting to get witness statements then high court.

[Casehardened]

Hi,

Just wanted to welcome you to the forum although sorry that you needed to find us.

I note that you are located in Scotland and as you probably know, the legal processes are somewhat different to the UK where most of our members are based.

Few of us are therefore able to offer specific advice on what you ought to do now. Having said this, we do have some very knowledgeable Scottish members, who may well be able to offer you advice when they visit the forum and have seen this thread.

There are also several parents on the forum who are currently in the same situation as yourself and they will be able to offer general advice on coping stratagems.

[J&PVTHW]

Hi myfamilyisinamess,

Firstly welcome to the forum, as Casehardened has said there are lots of parents here in simular situations who can offer lots of advice and comfort in this very difficult time.

My son was accused of raping his step sister early this year, also a historical rape with no evidence and no witnessess. As a mum i am devastated by the allegations and terrified for my son as you must be for yours.

I have made friends on the site and have been given lots of advice and guidence through this dreadful ordeal. I now do not know how i would have got through the last few months if it had not been for the kindness of members of the site. They have listened to me rant when i am really frustrated and offered words of comfort when i was extremely frightened.

Just remember, on this site you are not alone !! xx

[myfamilyisinamess]

Hi
Many thanks for your reply. I can't believe the amount of people who use this site.

My son now has 10 or 11 charges of a sexual nature against him. I spoke to solicitor who advised indicment will be served july / august with a provisional high court date of 04 sept. Trying to find evidence. His ex is bi polar and he has two children with her and their relationship has been on/off for 7 years. Coming up to xmas she kept changing her mind as to whether he could see children on xmas day, then she hit him with, she is 75% sure the baby is not his. He was in her flat on xmas eve to take kids for a few hours and he was playing rough and tumble with their 4 year old, she joined on,one thing lead to another then she said stop,so he did. He left with children, took them back later, then late xmas eve police arrive looking for him. He was out visiting another girl and when he came in we took him to police station. He was charged on xmas day with 2 sexual assault charges. he got out on bail and since then she went back to police with historic charges, only a couple of specific dates, some charges just a month given, no date or time. What a mess!
Can you give me any advice on gathering evidence etc

[gem]

hello welcome to the forum,
witnesses who know his ex would be a good idea if they are willing to testify for your son. face book is exellent for evidence . conversations, behaviour ect between her and your son going back as long as the allegations were made. gather as much info as you can on her friends and friends of friends who know a lot about her
has she said when the allegations took place roughly year month ect...

[MerlinScot]

I live in Scotland too and if you want I can offer different advice.

I was actually raped several times but the police turned on me accusing me of false allegations. My rapes were historical too and my case wasn't ever taken seriously at all from the start. So just wondering what your son's ex is using against him as evidence to convince the Crown Office to go to court.

It seems ridiculous to say this but I might help you a bit, making kind of cross reference to what the police dismissed in my case and what the police accepted as evidence in yours.

Your solicitor probably already informed you that your son's ex should have two strong pieces of evidence to support her claim. It depends what she's using, given that in historical rapes is difficult to prove the rape/rapes physically happened.

As concerning your son's ex disease, that's not taken into account. My ex is a certified depressed schizophrenic (meaning he even has different personalities taking over at a certain time), but that wasn't possible to use it as evidence against him, so I guess your son's ex bipolar disorder can't be used by your son as evidence of her false claim.

An advice, try to be objective. I know it's very difficult for a mum, but jumping on the "innocent man" wagon could do him some damage in the future, as my ex's family is actually doing. Remember that all raped victims have anonymous status until they're prved wrong, so spreading the word too much could put you into trouble for slander and label.

Good luck

[gem]

hi mabye law is different in scotland but if he has been charged with the offence he is entitled to get evidence for his case without causing harm to his accuser ..as long as it is within the law. i live in great Britain. and historic rape dosn.t need evidence as such only her word against his.. maybe someone can help me out here....is the law so different in Scotland as far as evidence goes.

[MerlinScot]

hi mabye law is different in scotland but if he has been charged with the offence he is entitled to get evidence for his case without causing harm to his accuser ..as long as it is within the law. i live in great Britain. and historic rape dosn.t need evidence as such only her word against his.. maybe someone can help me out here....is the law so different in Scotland as far as evidence goes.

Yes it is gem, as I found out at my expense. Her word against his isn't enough here, so she must have brought some kind of evidence that convinced the Procurator Fiscal to go ahead with the case.
Historical rapes don't go to court at all (the percentage rate is invisible, below 1%)unless.. well the PF office and the police were in dire need to boost their conviction rates. It's really a lottery.

[J&PVTHW]

Hi

Gem has as always already given you fantastic advice on gaining evidence to support your son. We logged facebook evidence, text messages, private messages from facebook sent from my son's accuser all during the same time period as she was accusing my son.

Collect anything you can, i.e was your son's accuser sending him friendly text messages during the same time as she has accused him of historic rape?

The above is the advice i was given when first joining the site which i started doing almost immediately. By the time i was asked to give a statement to the police about my son i had already downloaded evidence which indeed counted as a motive and maliciousness on my son's accusers part.

We are still on bail, my son has not been charged and i have collected evidence to support my son on a daily basis.

We have not given any further information to support my son to the police only discussed it with my solicitor. We will of course be producing this evidence IF my son is charged and is to appear in court. Only then will the CPS and police see the daming evidece we have.

Good luck and keep being strong, your son will need you in every possible way.

[Faith]

I am currently looking into cases of Scottish law after being troubled by what happened to MerlinScot, with a solicitor in Scotland that I know and some law students in Aberdeen University.

I have found several cases that went to court on a complainant's word alone so I am not 100% positive that every case MUST have two strong pieces of evidence (it also raises the evidence of what counts as strong) even if it is in the Scottish law guidelines.

If I find anything of interest, then I will share it in a seperate thread

In the meantime, I do know this...in Scotland or England, once a charge is brought, your son has a human right to build his own defense and he should utilise this right with the help of a specialised solicitor.

[MerlinScot]

I am currently looking into cases of Scottish law after being troubled by what happened to MerlinScot, with a solicitor in Scotland that I know and some law students in Aberdeen University.

I have found several cases that went to court on a complainant's word alone so I am not 100% positive that every case MUST have two strong pieces of evidence (it also raises the evidence of what counts as strong) even if it is in the Scottish law guidelines.

Faith, I'll point out 2 things:

- Aberdeenshire is promoting kind of "private battle against rapists", so even the Grampian Police is treating rape cases in a different way than in other parts of Scotland. Rape victims have also the support of a SOLO officer, in the Highlands we're not supported by anyone from the report onwards. I had personally to go to the police station to ask that a female police officer should be sent to take my statement.
I've no idea where exactly the OP lives, but in the upper Highlands the "corroborative" evidence is still the ones ruling the cases and the Cadder ruling is quite considered too.
I was confirmed this by Rape Crisis Aberdeen and they looked into my case. They already phoned me three times, clearly admitting that up here it's like we live in another world. So taking Aberdeen as an example for my case is not appropriate.

- As you were saying, Scottish Law says there must be corroborative evidence that the rape/rapes took place. So anything out of this is the local police or Crown Office attitude towards rape cases.

Anyway, thanks for looking better into this cases because I'm trying to find a solicitor too who can help me to get to the end of this mess.

@J&PVTHW: Facebook messages were used against me as evidence too, but that shouldn't be the main focus. My ex NEVER replied to any of my Facebook messages because he just didn't like to do it and that was stated in few texts and more evidence. So please don't take that as a safeguard for this lady's son case.

Anyway, if my experience, although strangely reversed, can be used as support and help to the OP's case, please feel free to PM me

[J&PVTHW]

MerlinScot

facebook evidence, text messages and any other correspondance from the accuser are completely relevent in our case and can be used as evidence to support the accused. The advice i have given myfamilysinamess is exactly the kind of advice i was given when first joining the site.

There MAY not be anything to disprove the accuser in any of the above BUT in my case having a look at facebook and text messages brought lots of evidence to support my son so would highly recommend it to another family going through a simular ordeal as myself.

[gem]

i agree with j on this... Facebook evidence is paramount in some cases and the first bit of advice given by members is to collect evidence for the defence.
sadly i never joined this site until my son was found guilty . with no evidence whatsoever no DNA nothing ... i decided to do my own detective work for my son.s appeal. and Facebook evidence i have uncovered is very strong. trouble is we all put our faith in the justice system and expect a fair trial. in my son,s case this did not happen. with hindsight i would have moved heaven and earth to help my son if i had know what the outcome would have been. and i definitely would have gathering anything i could to disproof her lies. i stand by all the advice i have given to members'' that it is very important to collect all evidence for the defence. if i had done this in the beginning of my son,s nightmare he would be a free man today .....

[MerlinScot]

Facebook is a lot overrated and can be even manipulated, if you want to know.

I'm telling you this having been for few years a computer programmer in the past.

My Facebook messages to the accused contained lots of sexy comments, even including how much I liked sex with him.

To like sex with the accused doesn't EQUAL I liked to be raped and it's coming out now in the post investigation.

Even if I liked sex with him, having my neck broken and my face pushed down on a couch by a 20-stone man not stopping to rape me wasn't fun.
Rape is about control, it has nothing to do with sex even if the accuser and the accused were in a relationship at the time of the rape/rapes.
Sorry if I was graphic, but sometimes it's needed.

So gem, probably Facebook messages could have saved your son as well as they couldn't. I gues you won't ever know, as I won't ever know what it would have happened if I had gone to the GP the first time I had been raped.
My emails and any kind of correspondence were full of lies, my ex couldn't stand, as mental patient, to lose control. So keeping him happy and quiet was my first priority, always. To achieve that, of course I had to tell lies.
What supported me in my defense is that I wrote the truth to all the rest of the world.

To the OP, collect all the evidence you can, avoid policemen as the plague, and find a very very good solicitor

Good luck

P.S: Gem, I wouldn't have deleted tons of evidence of my ex's abuse if I knew I was going to report him. But I was so sick of his abuse that I even deleted my facebook account after dumping him.
So don't blame it on yourself for what you could have done, that's the past, unfortunately.

[Faith]

Whether or not you personally agree with what evidence from Facebook suggests is irrelevant at the end of the day.
The point is, Facebook evidence IS admissable.

Your neck was broken during the rape?
I'm horrified that this was dismissed by police...surely there are medical records...