chidhood rape

[teulk]

My partner has just told me that as a child of 6-9yrs of age her farther repeatedly raped her (her mother also knew what was happening too) I knew she had been sexually/mentally assaulted by her father and that she attended councelling but until last night i didnt know to what extent. What i want to know is what can be done to bring this monster to justice, surely he cannot be allowed to get away with what he's done.................he doesnt even deserve to live ! To rape someone is terrible but a 6yr old !!!!!!!!!

[diana_holbourn]

I think he ought to be brought to justice as long as she's prepared to go through with it, because rapists tend to attack a number of people over time, not just one person at one time. So he might still be harming people like that. Perhaps a case is more likely to succeed if you can get coroborating evidence. He may have assaulted other children like some of her friends or family members when she was a child. Ask her if she ever saw it happen to anyone else, or whether any friends just stopped coming round with no explanation or didn't want to be near him, or if she can think of anything else that in hindsight may have appeared suspicious. If she can somehow contact those people again, perhaps she can ask if he ever behaved sexually inappropriately towards them, and whether they'd be willing to go to the police with her and press charges. Or has he lived with children since she moved away? Perhaps if she could contact them, she could ask them. She wouldn't necessarily have to go into detail about what happened to her if they say he never behaved towards them like that; she could say she was asking because he did something to her but she'd prefer not to go into details, or something.

Perhaps her counsellor could give evidence. If she's been to counselling with a rape support service, it will count as evidence that it happened.

[teulk]

My partner has 3 older sisters and he molested/sexually assaulted all of them in one way or another, as far as she is aware he only raped her. She has cut all ties with her family (apart from with 1 sister who is also having councelling) the rest of her family, well her 2 other sisters are in denial and just beleive what happend should stay in the past. What i find the most unbelivable is that one of her sisters has children and she still goes to see her parents on a regualr basis. When my partner told me what had happend i was so angry and it was all she could do to stop me from going round there and beating the **** out of him. It has been about two years since my partner attended councelling and she went and saw her father and told him exactly what she thought of him, as far as she is concerned it is over for her and she said and did what she needed to do/say to him. I however beleive he should still be punished but my parner does not want it all to be dragged up and made public.

[diana_holbourn]

If your partner doesn't want it publicized, and no one else is prepared to go to the police, perhaps you could ask her if she'd be willing to research any treatment programmes for rapists in your area and to ask her father if he can acknowledge that he needs to change his behaviour and ask if he would be prepared to accept help. Treatment programmes can make rapists more aware of the harm they're doing to their victims, and after they realise it, some can feel very remorseful and guilty. If he refuses, he may still be a danger. So perhaps she could get in touch with her sister and ask her children if they're ever uncomfortable around him. If he's still doing what he did before, he ought to be removed from children. Perhaps your partner will change her mind about going to the police if she thinks it might still be going on.

[maria]

i really feel for your partner and you . she has to do what is best for her but its people who actualy do do the crime that get away with it and people that haven't end up suicidle and punished with there lives destroyed this really angers me . this so called man SHOULD NOT GET AWAY WITH IT x good luck x